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l'appel du vide

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About l'appel du vide

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    Phoenix
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    Psychiatry, Pharmacology, Video Games, Philosophy, Spirituality, Religion, Politics, Skincare and Beauty.

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  1. I can feel your pain. I was also agoraphobic, and that is truly the worst mental affliction that I have had to deal with. Combine that with being depressed....may I ask why you are only on Klonopin and not any antidepressant and/or antipsychotic for your psychotic depression? Taking an antidepressant + antipsychotic along with my Klonopin has changed my life, a complete 180. It has put me in *mostly* full remission. I promise no matter how empty and void you feel inside, things WILL get better, but you have to put your foot through the door. Talk to your psych about your symptoms and get on a medication for this depression. I hope you find relief soon.
  2. I frequently take my 90 day Klonopin prescription on flights in my carry-on. They have never made any comments about it since I keep it in the original Rx bottle. But stimulants are a different ballgame. Traveling to another country I would definitely research the laws and also look into the stigmas surrounding these medications, especially since you mentioned the incident in Bolivia. If I were you I would only carry around a few pills discreetly if I am going to be out for awhile, and keep the Rx bottle at home. But it all depends on which country you are in, as someone stated in an Islamic country it would be very risky to carry around stimulants. Best of luck to you.
  3. I am seconding this. I have been on a daily Clonazepam regimen for going on 6 years now, and have actually reduced the dose from 1mg 3x a day to 0.25mg twice a day over time. It still works just as good as day one, and I've been panic attack free for these 6 years. I've only taken Alprazolam and Lorazepam as needed, but have heard of tolerance and redosing issues with those since they have short half-lives. Though, keep in mind tolerance to the carefree, loopy, sedating feeling that benzos can cause WILL happen no matter which medication you take. I have noticed only the anti-anxiety and anti-panic effects stay the same.
  4. Prozac has been the only SSRI I've been on that HASN'T felt like an SSRI, if that makes sense. The other SSRIs I've tried tended to really flatten me out, whereas echoing what others have said here, Prozac has stimulated me like a cup of coffee and did not make me TOO apathetic (I have to take Rexulti for my apathetic/anhedonic tendencies). I have read that Prozac has a unique mechanism, acting as a 5-HT2C antagonist, which is probably what makes it stand out from the other SSRIs. I promise you that Prozac will be very gentle on you, I had little to no start up side effects. It's been good to me for a total of 6 years. Good luck to you, you will find relief soon.
  5. Antidepressant wise, Prozac has been the best for me. If we're talking any medication, then that would be Rexulti. Such a good medication. The two together synergize so well.
  6. From what I thought, most modern antidepressants such as SSRIs (with the exception of Paxil, AKA Paroxetine), SNRIs (Duloxetine, Desvenlafaxine, Venlafaxine), Wellbutrin (Bupropion), Viibryd, Trintellix....etc all have little to no anticholinergic effects. Do you live in the US? Usually it's the older Tricyclics that have heavy anticholinergic effects. The antidepressant I take now, Fluoxetine (Prozac) has no anticholinergic effects I'm almost positive. It should be very easy to find one that has no such effect.
  7. Please don't be scared of taking it, I know taking antipsychotics can sound scary as I was very scared to try Rexulti, a different antipsychotic, but it has helped me so much with no side effects. These are really effective and safe medications. Plus, you're on such a low dose I really don't think you'd run the risk of having any side effects. Do yourself a favor and relax, and get some much needed sleep.
  8. I've also been on the same dose range as you, 0.5mg-3mg a day for years with no problems. But because of the opioid epidemic, they don't want to be responsible in any ODs. How do they know if their patient is secretly taking an opioid along with their benzo prescription? Plus, some doctors genuinely think of benzos as something that gets you insanely high like amphetamines or opioids. It doesn't help that the withdrawal from them can be uncomfortable. I think it's so overhyped, everything about benzos. The only thing not overhyped is how effective they are for anxiety/panic. I am just as dependent on my Prozac, Rexulti, and Trazodone as I am on my Klonopin. Privately insured psychs wont be as benzophobic, but medicaid ones, YES. They simply don't want to be held accountable incase ANYTHING were to happen.
  9. I've always taken Rexulti in the AM. It made me slightly tired at first, and now I think it's slightly stimulating.
  10. How common is it for BPD people to go on sex binges? I've been craving sex and getting it anywhere I can. I make sure I am safe, but I wonder if what I'm doing is wrong.
  11. I take clonazepam 0.25mg twice a day. Have taken up to 3mg a day, but I've been on clonazepam daily regardless for 6 years now. I am physically dependent but I am not addicted; I never crave clonazepam or abuse it. It still works for me, I think you have nothing to worry about. It is a life saver for anxiety and panic.
  12. Thanks so much for the reply. I had only gotten sober by detoxing, at home at that. I haven't been to a 12 step meeting in a long time, I think I ought to swallow my pride and check it out. I definitely am experiencing PAWS, some days are much worse than others. Example, today is a good day. It's so strange how the brain works; I hope the PAWS goes away soon or dies down a lot. I can't get the vivitrol injection because of financial reasons, so I am stuck on the once a day pill.
  13. Klonopin 0.25mg-0.5mg twice a day - Antianxiety/Antipanic Prozac 20mg a day - Antidepressant/Antiobsessive Rexulti 1mg a day - Antipsychotic/Antidepressant Trazodone 50mg a night - Sedative Naltrexone 50mg a day - Anti-opioid/antiaddiction Truvada 200mg/300mg a day - PrEP/HIV protection
  14. I have been craving opioids again, after being clean for 7 weeks. It's hard to believe I am admitting this to really anyone, but I miss them a lot. This is going to sound more like a blog post but I need reassurance from someone who was also addicted to opioids, specifically heroin and fentanyl. I am randomly smelling the vinegary burnt marshmallow smell (I would smoke H and percs) and it's driving me nuts. I'm on Naltrexone 50mg a day....can't get the implant. Everything in my life is going well and I am just scared of what could be. I don't want to die. Is anyone else recovering from opioids? They scare me so much. So many people I once knew are now dead. I hate taking the once a day pill, since I could easily stop it, but I don't want to talk to anyone about my thoughts as I know they will pass. What's the right thing to do? Just do it? The reason this is especially difficult is that I live with my parents, who think that naltrexone is a literal cure. They think I'm cured as long as I take naltrexone. How do you tell someone your willpower is weakening? They will think I want this. I don't know what to do.
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