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hopeless

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Everything posted by hopeless

  1. Treatments haven't done jack. So now I have shitty memory on top of depression. I've forgotten a lot of things from before the ECT and having trouble retaining new information. How do I bring this up at work without getting fired. It's like fucking Memento
  2. After I woke up from ECT today I realized that the left and right edges of my tongue were swollen. I didn't get a chance to inform the nurse. Has this happened to anyone? I don't see my ECT doctor till Thursday so not sure what to do in the meantime. I took two Advil. How do I prevent this from happening again?
  3. I've been thru six (or seven) ect treatments...bad memory loss. Still more to go. I felt well briefly but back to my depressed self. Not feeling very positive.
  4. I'm in the middle of treatment. Will have #7 on Friday. Made a difference first couple times but I've been in a depressive rut the past couple days. The memory loss is brutal...cant remember anything. But it's worth it if I get better
  5. I've been hospitalized twice this past year. Both were positive experiences. The second time I was hospItalized for ECT.
  6. Hi, I have treatment resistant depression for four years. I've been on over 10 drugs and NONE have worked for me. I've been hospitalized twice. Started ECT a little less than a month ago. five treatments in. Feel AMAZING. Run, don't walk to ECT. I'm willing to get these for life if it means feeling this way. I feel naturally happy. Check out my threads in the ect forum.
  7. What is retrograde amnesia mean? I'm not sure what kind of ect I'm having...I'll ask the doctor... I'm thinking of taKing some adderall to make up for the loss of focus
  8. After the last ECT treatment, how long does the memory loss last till?
  9. Yeah. I feel like a fucking failure cuz meds have never worked for me. And ECT is fizzling out. Maybe I'll ask the doctor for some adderrall to offset the lack of focus and memory loss. ECT + work + 5 day wedding = ugh And I'm having trouble scheduling future appointments. Sucha PITA.
  10. It was very difficult to concentrate at work, especially with the obvious gaps in memory. It's so depressing I feel so helpless. The suicidalness is creeping back in.
  11. They don't give me anything while I'm conscious...not sure if they insert something while I'm knocked out. Do these effects last? Should I prepare to crash?
  12. Treatment four today. I'm willing to get these for life if it means feeling this great! I injured my tongue in the last treatment so I told the anesthesiologist about it. This time my tongue was okay but my inside cheek is lacerated.
  13. I was on lithium prozac zyprexa and cymbalta during a breakup. Did not help.
  14. The past two days have been great. I am full of energy. I baked cookies and they didn't turn out well and in my usual depressed state that would have upset me but I did not have a care in the world. friends say I look different and I'm only three treatments in. I feel almost manic. It might be because I'm still on the prozac. Once I'm off that I might be at a normal level. This feels amazeballs.
  15. Uh oh....did I go back to work too soon? Friday was my first day back. I have been able to manage so far... This week I have ETC Monday and Wednesday. Planning to work the rest of the days. Hoping for a miracle. Staying positive.
  16. First day back at work. Forgetting alot of things like passwords. I still have a couple weeks of ECT left. The days I get it done I've been sleeping a lot. Feeling better today
  17. Back home from the hospital today. Had three ECT sessions so far. 9 more to go. I have a slight headache and bit down on my tongue =/ Mood wise I don't see an improvement but other people have said I look better.
  18. Waiting to get admitted now. I think I'm gonna go for it. Been too miserable. Thanks lavendarfairy. I already used up most of my FMLA last year when I was in patient. We do a rolling year. =/ my doctor said she'll have me back at work in three weeks. Let's hope.
  19. No, right now I'm waiting at the doctor's office. They don't allow phones at my inpatient
  20. Thanks for sharing your experiences. I spoke to HR today and I only get three weeks off so idk what to do. My job or my health? I have no motivation to go to work anyway. It sucks I really need the health insurance.
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