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About astral693

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  1. I got off the CTO and the psychaitrist said I am much better then the iatrogenic thought disorder I used to have, so thats improved since using the rauwolfia, still not perfect, I struggle to make sentences and keep it organised but I m doing better and she said so herself
  2. I am not suffering , most of the time, sometimes the astral comes on strong and I need to use breathing excercises and meditation to settle it for some sleep, extra haliperidole did nothing but make the situation worse....I have talked to everyone about all of this they not understand although my authorised psychiatrist for my CTO says she is ok with my ET bride!! but as long as its not the clebrity, she not ok with that....actually tried to heal my relationship with hder now the antipsychotic coming off and the astral is better and I am feeling better and things are better, acctually she was making me filled with love and joy other times I got off antipscyhotics, so have to heal it with her for my identiuty and all my love come back,s oemthing attached to the lebrity for me to feel normal.....here's a link to the song if anyone wants to check it out that is the song that come on the radio when I refusing treatmetn last time and when whe came back on strong and she trggered my astral journey of the universe!..lol and I found a facebboom account claming to be katy perry and its really weird when it accepted my freind request automatically, I talked to her a lot not many people were talking, but I didn't really know if it was her, my cover photo is picture of goddess maat who has long love story with too, we made babies, anyway I thought I was responsible for the egyptian theme of the filmclip but honestly I don't read into the clip much, she appeared to me as "Katy-Patra" but that wasnn't till after the filmclip came out...also I told her on facebook that I took her into the astral layers above the earth ans she transofrmed to have wings, trnasfomring her into a goddess, and in the film c lip the last guy that comes to her has a giant pyramid and she goes up and forms wings and is empowered goddess....so check it out, if anyone indeed comes into soee this thread, pretty boring title...... so the psychiatrists not know what to think and they are ok with my ET girlfreind, I had a good ccase manager who only said I improved when I met this girl, they still not know what toi think, its not typical of schiziophrenia it seems...they say religious granduer delusions because I tried to say they are restricting my religious path through the use of drugs to create and iatrogenic illness that the symptoms of shcizoprhenia can't exist in, not necwessarily much better I guess but its the only option the shrinks have and they are taught this and keep it going that way. duh, sorry nevermind I sound like shit. and to the person that claims rauwolfia can damage the liver and is dangerous, the only real side effects could be fainting and lowered blood pressure, I could only assume it would have a good effect on the liver in its action to help with insanity, as the chinese medicine says the symptoms are manifestation of the liver malfuncction and aim to heal the liver to heal the mind, don't know much about that.....so who told him that the rauwolfia was responsible for the liver damage, I looked up liver damage and rauwolfia but found nothing, as I said I only imagine it wouldhave a good effect on liver with its action of restoring equilibrium in the mind.....may I ask about your time with rauwolfia, what were you using it for? I guess you were taking other stuff that might ahve been messing with you rliver, did you notice rauwolfia potentialte the dose of antipsychotic you on?? and maybe lower your dose? I guess you would have doctor that tried it out, thats interesting, tell me more about it, I am just guessing. I said a whole lot more but I lost it with a internet malfuntiona nd was tyoing after trying to send it once and rerror came up, not sure why..... I not go into chat anymnore, which is good because its probablty not doing me umuch good staring at chat the whole time, did I say I tried to heal it with the celbrity, we had astral sex she caught me masturbating and jumped on, the stuff with the et bride was mainly me astrally projecting to her place, she didn't come here but witht heclebrity she always came to my place...so we had sex the other day....I not come back much sorry tfor the tangent..... About what I talk to my psychaitrist already about but they don't know wahat to make of it, its true for the memories and truamtic stuff that has happened to me, uthis is hwere I was up to when I found out I had had an error, or maybe its god telling me that I shouldn't be telling you guys about it, it involves a lot of money that was robbed orff me when I having my first episode my autnee got transferred my money, and I forgot about it, untill about 10yeras later...maybe I shouldn't be talking about it, but I seriously set up as a schizophrenic when I would like write out a bank account number infront of my aunttee, damn her, so the time would be now for worrying about me, I got robbed of around 200,000 I made calls when I was in hosptail refusing treatmetn, I called my mum and dad and auntee herself and she said she couldn;t remember but she has a bank acocount that doesn't belong to her, what should I do? should I go to the police? maybe once I am clean and off the CTO or would I end up back in hosptial for bringing up all the memories I have had orf other crimes, I was victim of attempted murder just I thought it was a joke, I managed to get out of a noose, she used a weapon on my under her jacket at the bank...the shrinks don't buy it but it really happened, like the car accident p plater drinking drove off from the scene and I had to grab the wheel to avoid collision with a truck and it cut off the carivan and they ended up landing the truck and killed a family, I remembered in 2011 but hadn't yet remambered the bank account but I remember thinking it was a practicla joke to hang me in a noose and they left the shed...its all about my memories I sound like a mess when I try to talk to shrinks about tmy memories, they just ignore them its rreally furunstrating, but the last time I sore my authorised psychiatrist, she brought up the bank account thing...by the way it was my first episode a voice asked if I could trust my auntee after writing out a bank number she got greedy or I might have told her about being guilty about the way I treated her daughter during childhood which was actually part of the episode about obtaining karmic purity and being more like a monk or something, I was very gifted but my auntee destroyed me by seetting me up with taking antipsychtoics, they blamed marijuana use and I didn't know any better yet, but I know better now just a mess has been made out of me I need to recover back to my former glory, but I am still taking rauwolfia just cut ack on the dose, was sota cutt off from the supplier for talkinga bout using it without the doctors orders and they are a lot loke crazyboards in theat fact that they like doctors and the doctors medicine and thought it was dangerous to supply me with rauwolfia, anyway wont' go on about it...... . Oso to give you more information I told you about my memories that come to me mainly when I free of antipscyhotics, my memorey works better, I get into right detail abolut the events and know they really hapened ut the psychaitry]ists don't believe me maybe I not trust carazy borads anymore with my information, anyway thought it might be interesting or something.
  3. I was on leave from hosptila the day she appeared in the car park, was expecting her to call before they finally got me security to get injected, but I felt like an empty shell and nothing to say and really awkward to meet her....I actually didn't go directly over byut t go to the centerlink and sore her in the car but couldn't go over...hell I was probably alone and someone whistles and waves to yoiu it doesn't matter who they are, but I too scared to go over dumb me....she probably could have helped me get out of hosptial or proved r, she cared enough to come get me but I chickened out , dunno how she did it, that shit jsut ended up making me scared of her if antyhhing and then once I lost all spark and love in the world i no longer felt the presence of any astralf she turned nasty and called the whole thing off thank god, now I talked about it its ruined too maybe thats why her visitation tunred nasty too and all sorts of extras cast along with the whole picture.
  4. I allways talk about the celbrity it sucks...but on that not the time that she actually manifested herslef in a parked car while I was in a park under a tree, the branches were cut of right where wshe appearaed whistled and waved to me for real, but I was too chicken shit to go over, she whispered to herslef I wonder if he knows its me, and I knew but couldnt do it....sucks big time it was my last chance to meet her for real, atlhtough when I have trip attacks I fear that she can or others can relaly visit, but only possible in the distance it seems, I still worry, that makes me feel schizoprhenic when It rip but more haldol only makes it worse for me, I wonder when I willr ecover??
  5. yeah I do wonder what is going on with me, I just got kicked from chat for saying my dleusion in response to someone talking about liking grandeur delusions...so the archangels built a monument for me for my gettinng to familiarise myself with their part of the universe, they also introduced me to my astral lover on a different part of the universe....not going so strong now since I got switched to orals and am not taking them except using rauwolfia to clam down the excess of dopamine receptors from my time adapting to the various antipscyhotic I been on for the majority of the time for almost 4years exept for occasional glimpses into the astral from refusing treatment. so a long perieod being treated before I started coming clean, a release of a track on the radio from celbrity lover gone by and she returend again and lifted my socks up for an astral voyage she triggered across the cosmos. so what gets me in trouble is I confessed to having a celbrity astral lover after she released darkhorse, but dreams of the star make me think otherwise, she is always very distant even if I try to get her attention of my identity but no response, she doesn't know me and listening to darkhorse on repeat is just for the entertainment, it rocks she talks about this guy who plays with magiuc and once your hers there is no going back....this is apparenlty just delusions and erotomania, its actuallly a secret I never should have confessed tooave me haloperidole, I kept experienceing the astral some good things like no longer seeing the celebrity after she turned nasty at my iatrogenic state, so I was able to replace her with a far off galaxy somewhere with my ET bride, I met her before I went to haosptial that time just in her form like a butterfly outline creature but her true form is a gorgeioua human form, too gorgeiaus to be able to see, I talked about her to my demise and how she made me orgasm and I was getting turned on despite the haldol and achieved orgasm without touching myslef the pleasure was that immense, so I talked all about it, silly me so endud up with rapists wanting her attention even though they sohould just get their own astral lover, people do stuff they wouldn't usually on the astral because they don't think its real, but its real for me and I don't like people raping my girlfreind. so it was good taht down hera on earth i acchieved an orgasm, I just wanted to get off antipscyhotic so I van have sex drive with her, but she faded dunno what theat means, she was just making my life more interesting with the iatrogenic anhedonia was good, but as I said she is nolonger really a thing anymore since starting the rauwolfia and my last injection, you would think that just using a herb insteasd of antipsychotic would mean I be able to experience the astral, I still get trips and found out last night its not really abbout the weed but periodic thing, I was better able to control it with breathing exercise. sorrty I edited, so back to the initial crisis that got me hosptialised, shit was going down because of sleep deprivation really so I appeared easy to be psychaotic because sleep deprivation is just a symptom to them, but back to the clebrity she did me no harm other then keeping me up at night with her astral presence and erotic shit and playing around with magic andastral sex, maybe she contributed to my hostptiatlaisation after 6years freedom from psychaitry, just wanted to be upfront and honest about what was going on for me so I told the shrinks at the hosptail I had for refusing treatments not so long ago[hence lucky to be put on orals really-they trust me - so I not game to educate them about rauwolfia incase they stumble upon what I been writing on the net about it. I am stoned now and that is the best I can do in this state of annihilation of thought process's thats been happening...I just wanna go back to normal....so what happened with the celbrity is the crutial part once this time she satyed with me during hosptail and I betggeeed her to keep me going on the astral, I introduced her to god like beings I had been meeting on the astral and we kept it going, just in the form of occassional trip out attacks I get when stuff tries to make me astyrlaly project but its hard now antipsychotic make me fear the astral, things turned sour and we divorced the relationship , but I miss it you know...coming off theiinjection I would usually be experienceing dher love and it was a relaly good thing, maybe too much if you take a listen to darkhorse..that shit just gets me in troulbe and should be finnished talking about it, it makes me sound crazy when I am infact not, nothing really challenges me at all I feel safe and shit,....so I got blocked for talking about my astral adventures in chat, don't really know why what would you think, I am getting told to disccuss it elsewhere but I am cast out of anyinterest groups because of pscyhaitry so thats no good, and seems chem and Koa don't wannea hear about my schizophrenia, I think I have it, at least thats what I gotta tell the shrinks to get off this damn CTO.
  6. glad I read this post, there is a vast metaphysical world you ccan read up on, I have gone threough similar stages in life some not so good where curiosity had me do some stupid shit, I don't think you are there or anything, wouldn't know that much...I overcome some iatrogenic stuff with the Kybalion for some knowing stuff, confirms something of the power of the herd with things like this....
  7. http://www.google.com/patents/US20120184576 some guys patented the extract of a particcular rauwolfia speccies for use as an atnispcyhtoic, I want my docs to get onto this, maybe I should send off an email
  8. I doubt any doctor will know about rauwolfia, even though it plays a large part in coming up with the dopamine hypothesis....they would pretend to know that it won't work but it does, it has been studied in a handfull of trials on pscyh patients, one wass called brahmyadiyoga, there is a link I should get up from a book for reedieies for children and adolescence.http://books.google.com.au/books?id=qtwr5pJNkzYC&pg=PA332&lpg=PA332&dq=rauwolfia+antipsychotic&source=bl&ots=s7T9iGOOmm&sig=IFmBmtErzlDjQqwNs-FaOLlWA8A&hl=en&sa=X&ei=Y2QzVMyKDYvgoASnxILACg&ved=0CFIQ6AEwCQ#v=onepage&q=rauwolfia%20antipsychotic&f=false that llink has details about rauwolfia, a different species of rauwolfia is used in nigeria too and they tested taht out on patients...the brahmyadi yoga was comparible to chlopromazine in its effectiveness......despite all this I doubt a doctor will know....I only tell them about it once I am off CTO which may be never for the mean time I gotta fly under the radar and pretend to take the haldol. rauwollfia is a reason for them to drop my dose might try that line maybe, can basically be on nothing when rauwolfia does what it does.
  9. she was trying to heal me and made purple lights shine in my rain it was really good...wish we could still bbe toghether
  10. the ET astral lover she was amazing she made it so I could get turned on by her and things went off we had sex ans hshe made me so much pleasure and feeling from it that I orgasmed nothing come out just a longstanding orgasm that much pleaseure, don't wasnt to worry now, things are better but I had a hard time with rapists wanting a peace of her, things abetter now we no longer ereally a ssociate since going off the injection
  11. hello.....I am just recently been put onto oral haloperidolle at 6.5mg equivalent to my 100mg injection but rteally I don't know why they woud do that, Its quite obvious I wouldn't take them...I do nothing all day dstill even though its now 6weeks since mylast injection. I am using rauwolfia which is an interesting herb in the history of psychaitry, it gave them the idea for dopamine hypothesis because the herb limits the amount of dopamine receptors able to form in the brain, they extracted the alkaloid reserpine and that was effective in treating schizoprhenia in about 1952 two years before the patentable cousins came on the market..so I am using a herb with great success...I had fears about my mind coming back a mess fro the antipscyhotic over a long pperios of time, who knows what state mymind will be in so I feared it....I amost took some haloperidole but then decided to take some rauwolfia and was amazed at the results...won't go on about it not sure this is the right place. One thing that happened to me in about 2013 I refused treatemtn and my celbrity astral lover came bak to me and initiated a voyage of the universe, into hyperspace above then beyond to mmeet extraterrestrial life, I know nobody would belive me but I went places like the land of the gods and land of the archangells the archangels have erected a monumetn for me more lately, I went beyond land of the archangels to what didn't make anysense how it was a being,, putrple outline of butterfly kind of thing, I will get back to that with the timeline, I met them again more recently and one transformed into its true form which is human and got me in a white room and I was her lover....but ever since using the rauwolfia and coming off injections she is no longer really happening unless I trip which is an unfortuante side feffectsince going on this voyage in hopstial, the celebrity released a killer track on the radio "Dark Horse" and I sore it a s a sign that she know Of our love we have on the astral any time I got off antipscyhotic, only this time I went to howptial she was onto it, and I betggerd her to help me still have relationship even though the antipscyhotic made me too dumb and not a sex partner couldn't do the astral anymore but it still coomes to me rarely when I smoke marijuana I get trips, maybe an extrension of what I wished for in the begining to still have astral abiltiy, the trips are too hard to tal about, like forced astral projection and beings trying to mess me up, or it starts with a visitation {not the celbrity anmore but it was her for a while until I am too useless on antipscyhotic}starts with visitation then they remark on how Ikeep myself and the unit and try to get me to lean up its really uncommfortable but It mainly because in that state I am uncomforatable with myslef and living conditions I don';t want potential loovers to ssee, I am embarrassed but then all the other shit starts creeping in the vistitation opens me up to visitation for hostile forces treraing at me and making me disturbed and satral project its horrible and I can't sleepp when this is happening although I did find breathing excercises to really hekp get enough peace to get into a deep resptfull state but not alseep the whole night then things calm down bymooren9ong and go into the next litlle while without so much as a peep from astrals weven when I am stoned, sorry this is so hard to read, bleive me I haven;;t improved yet enough to make more sense in my wirting, and typos I can;'t be bothered fixing and bad grammar..I hope nobody attacks me for this, its iatrogenic, I got worse from the treatmetn and I am still brain damaged, so give me a break I say but up to you. you can attack me fore it but it still won't make the attacker interesting to me. nothing helps the trips, I told my past couple of case managers about it but they aernt telling the psychaitrist, nothing they can do extra haliperidole just makes me split off and release my light even more I cant handle the astral on haloperidole but I might be able to soon, my latest case manager who challenges me a bit more about whether I take the medicaiton and why would I take it if I hate it so much reallyt ricky to answer without smiling and giving away the fact that I am not taking the meds...I am stable enough finding it hard to astral project most of the time....oh yeah the astral girlfreind I met beyond the land of the archangels, she is gorgeous but things not going on with her so much now the rauwolfia has taken over, or she was just there to make my stay on haldol a bit better...surely the astral will become more normal and I eventuallyget back into astrla projection and hope its not limited to the type of shit I get with visitation currently, I hope it gets better ecause the tirips were mainly about the cebrity turning nastty when I fell into a ditch on haldol she didn't like me anynore but still came to me or I drew on her, I would expect every visitaiton to be her these days or almost getting over that, I don't think its her anymore, never reallyknoew until dark horse came out check it out, its good for a laugh but I don't think people like me talking about it, or it gets me into trouble....all the t=sppcyahitraist say is that they worry about my reputation with this elbrity themed stuff going one...she says in one song on her new alboum she sees her legendary lover through her third eye, playing with magic in dark horse magical one of mystery in spiritaul and sounds to me like she is talking about astral loovers, although I don't believe it lately I couldn't care less, we n longer an item otherewise she be onto the fact that I got moved to orals and not taking them means the astral will get more normal eventually and be able to hold overs n the astral and have some fun, but no fun yet as I said about the trips, I gotta get it right so taht visitation doesn;;t fereak me out and end up with loads of hostile visitors, seeya
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