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Dark_Princess_78

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About Dark_Princess_78

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    Undisclosed, Ohio
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    Dancing all night, chocolate, Bacardi, checking out the Internet, anime, and more I can't think of now.
  1. I actually have 2 stories. One boyfriend was unipolar depressed, and the other a bipolar 1. The depressed one was always suicidal and in and out of the hospital. I'd take him home, and back again. It was terrible. I was actually the stable one in that relationship. I couldn't melt in front of him. I melted alone or with family, but never in front of him. He needed my strength. Then the second one was bipolar 1. He lived with his mother and still worked, despite having psychosis and a long history of hospitalization. They flirted with a schizoaffective DX. His mother ruled his life and would not let him make choices for himself, and he let her. He wanted to go on SSDI, and his mother refused to "let" him and "made" him work. She just didn't understand. It ended up that one day I took the unipolar depressed guy to the hospital, called his mom to tell her, and never saw him again. I just couldn't handle it. Then one day the bipolar one told me that his mother told him to do this or that, and I just couldn't hear another thing about his mother, so I blew up at him and that was the end of that. But overall, I don't see a problem with it, as long as at least one person is somewhat stable. You understand what each other is going through. A "normal" person doesn't understand, but we do. I really love other crazy people in general.
  2. Finally, someone did something RIGHT for one of us for a change and things worked out! Excellent!!! I always love to hear good news. Too bad there isn't enough of it.
  3. I think the most important thing is that your pdoc knows you quit taking your Wellbutrin. At least then he or she has a record of what you are really taking. I'm happy you like Risperdal! I have the same problem with what I take. I don't know what I need and don't need anymore. There are so many things in my cocktail that I'm not sure. I think I'm going to ask my pdoc about trying an experiment to see what, if any, medication we can eliminate. DP
  4. I've been depressed for some time now, and nothing is getting me out of it. My pdoc doesn't know what to do. I'm thinking of changing doctors because my doctor should know what to do. Anyway, I feel like throwing myself in the middle of traffic. I just need to be here for my son. I've been on unemployment for awhile now, and it is wearing out, and there is still no job in sight. I'm a personal trainer and they just aren't hiring. This is so pathetic that I have to ask you this, but looking at my cocktail, what do you think I can suggest to my pdoc that we do? My pdoc is an idiot. DP
  5. Thanks! I'm realizing more and more every day that I'm in love with him. I don't know if it is mutual or not. Today he said to me that the store associates would be all over me when I went in to buy this phone charger, and I made a comment about how I'm NOT hot, and he backpeddled and said they do that to everyone. Clearly, that was a compliment. I'm so afraid to say or do anything. I don't want to risk anything. I've had a million dreams and a million plans, and just can't do anything. If it will be natural, then how? He told me today that his family asks him all the time why we don't get married, and I just laughed, and he never offered any reasons as to why we're not married, or laughed, but he kind of just sat there. Maybe I should have taken the chance to ask him why we're not married That kind of opportunity never comes around.
  6. Ok. So I end up in the strangest love situations. I should probably not date for awhile and focus on why I have strange love situations, I know that. Anyway, here goes... My current boyfriend is one of these guys who says he'll call at a certain time, and then time goes by without him calling. When I call him, he'll be already doing something else. We were in the process of making plans last night, only for me to call him 2 hours after he was supposed to have called me, and he was already at home (40 mins from me) cleaning his house. This is a pet peeve of mine that I totally hate. I can't stand it. Of all relationship no-nos for me, this tops the list (along with cheating and hanging on other women). Not calling is the sign of a lemon to me. Other than that, he has a heart of gold, which is hard to find. He opens up to me like no one else, and trusts me, and *claims* he wants to be with me. Some of these feelings are returned and some are not, especially considering how he alienates me by not calling when he says he will (GRRRRRR). So, peanut gallery please, what should I do with this man? Have a talk? Throw him out the door? Be more relaxed? Focus on me? Combo of the above? Thanks so much, DP
  7. I'm a personal trainer and I also teach fitness classes at a gym, so you're in luck! She probably gave you shady supplements that increase your metabolism as long as you're taking the substance, and as soon as you stop, the weight will come back. You are probably also taking things to make you lose water weight. This stuff can be very dangerous. It can also interact with your bipolar meds. I would run it by your pdoc. S/he will know about what is in that stuff exactly and be able to tell you if it is even safe. I wouldn't get excited about the weight loss, because I bet my bottom dollar it will come back if you stop taking the supplements. You could also be taking protein, which is fine, but you can get that from supplement shakes (I especially like the Curves shakes because they're good soy protein, high in vitamins and minerals and low in fat and calories), and these shakes aren't hundreds of dollars or something. You can buy them for about $30/3-4 week supply. Drink them along with a nutritious meal. That being said, exercise will build your muscle and increase your metabolism the natural and safe way, and it is FAR better for you than any fad supplements. I used to starve myself to be thin, and when I learned moderation and stopped the crazy supplements/starvation it opened a new world for me. I'm a healthy weight now. I'm also rather buff and could beat up many of the guys who work out at our gym!
  8. I used to have this problem in the beginning when I first started Lamictal. I think it is a problem of when you're taking it. I think you should talk to your pdoc about either splitting the dose, or taking it at a different time of the day. Drink a lot of water too. Sometimes my headaches go away if I get hydrated.
  9. My rent is too expensive for my Chapter 7 budget, so I'm apartment hunting. I need a 2 room place for myself and my son. The problem is that because I'm in bankruptcy, no landlords will give me the time of day. The only places I get to see are real dumps. I can afford better than that, but can't afford where I am now. I need a balance, but no one will give me a chance. Do you have any ideas? I've never been late on my rent and I can get a cosigner if necessary.
  10. I'm not a pdoc of course, but it does sound like BP1. I don't think it is the end of life as you know it. Actually, BP and the psychosis are very treatable. There will be relapses, there are usually relapses for everyone at some points, but for the most part you can live symptom-free for long periods of time with the right medication combination. This may sound very, very weird, but BP has actually ENRICHED my life in that I have been to the heights and depths of human experience and come out on top. I'm probably a BP1 but haven't been DXed officially with it yet. I guess I'm not crazy enough Look at the bright side. You are a fuller, more vibrant person. It sounds weird, I know, but a lot of CBers will understand. Some won't agree. We're all different and have different reactions and experiences with our disorders. Get on meds, and the right ones. It is so important. There is the "kindling" effect, and that is when your brain actually gets damaged by your disorder and your episodes get worse as time progresses and you have more and more episodes. Don't let your brain get worse. Get some medication!
  11. I'd get familiar with the course of his cycles, so you can predict when he'll come down off of this high and what to expect when he does. Let him know that you care about him and your relationship (if you haven't already), and that's why you want to go slower with the physical side of things. Good luck with whatever you want out of this. I hope you can sort it out with yourself and with him. Things like this are complicated. In the meantime, everyone else has said everything I was thinking.
  12. Whiskey, I totally understand how you feel. I've had relationships like that, where I really don't miss my significant other and while he may be #1, there is a #2 or even #3 also in the picture. It never meant that I didn't love them all, just that maybe they all were different to me and I appreciated different things about them all. I had a make-out fling with my boss not all that long ago, and am taking the time to decide if I'll maybe take a stab at being more than friends with my best friend (a guy). If I do end up with him, that will be the end of my multiple lover ways. In the meantime, I'm just thinking, and if something interesting comes up, I'll go for it in a casual way. BAD BAD BAD !!! I know what it's like to feel like you should feel more but don't. In any relationship, there are tough times to weather. It doesn't mean you won't pull through. You can be honest with him to a point and just say that he was gone so long and you need to warm up to him again or something like that. In any relationship, you're going to have your highs and lows. Just accept it as a low if you'd like to continue your relationship. It sounds like he *could be* a catch, but it's up to you to decide if he's meeting your needs enough to keep him. Don't be afraid to reserve some of yourself to be selfish, and at the same time bond. We all need to look out for #1, ourselves. Sorry to say, but I do believe in taking care of ourselves first, because without that, what do we have to care for others with? DP
  13. I could write a lot about what to expect in a lot of ways, but mainly, they will make sure you don't have anything you can hurt yourself with, and structure your day. You'll have time when you get your meds, time when you eat, time to do what you want, time to sleep, and all of that. Some places allow smoking and some do not. Some make you wear a patch, and some let you go in a courtyard or something, some have a smoking room, and other variations. Some places (most actually) make you get a Dr's order before you're allowed to have caffeine! Talk about strict! You're not even allowed to have regular coffee or soft drinks at all the places I've been to except for one. You're making the best choice. Good luck! dp
  14. Karuna, yes, I've had a historically messed-up love life. I don't know why I feel compelled sometimes to just jump into things, which is why I'm making darn sure that I'm making a smart move if I do decide to tell him. If I want to, then the choice will be a long time in coming. What brought on the desire to tell him is just that in contrast to the bad "relationships" I've had recently, it proves to me again and again how I really feel about him. We're just so good for each other, unlike the other scumbags I tend to bring into my life and end up regretting. But to decide to go for it, I need to be DARN SURE that it is the right thing. I had that ill-fated interlude with my boss (yikes!), and then a date with my ex that ended up not working out. Thank heavens for that! These terrible experiences have proven to me what love and closeness I do have with my friend. These experiences just highlight what I've already known. But this isn't something to play around with. If I go for it, it has to be right, and at the right time. I think I need to make sure that everything is right.
  15. My best friend is a guy. We've been best friends for 10 years, since college. I'm sure that at points in our relationship we've both thought of each other as more. A lot of people tell me that we'd make a great couple and we're so sweet together. I love him with my whole heart and do wonder if we should give it a go. I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I love him as more. I have for years and haven't done anything about it for fear of rejection. HELP!!! What should I do? Should I give it a go and tell him how I feel? Should I keep it hush hush? Should I hint and see if he bites? This is so confusing!
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