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Ceicbot

Member
  • Content Count

    36
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About Ceicbot

  • Rank
    Member

Contact Methods

  • Yahoo
    stmpchik

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Woman
  • Interests
    Watching the show Shameless, Glee, Supernatural and Horror movies.
    Also Youtube
    and Tumblr

    But only on good days...

Recent Profile Visitors

1,840 profile views
  1. Its raining which usually means im happier. Usually..

  2. i hate being in this state. Its like im aware of how sick i am but since its in me i cant change it. i feel like im in an aquairium. i can see out but i dont see a way out

  3. i was literally feeling great today...its like they want me sick..why would they she say that? ugggh im so irritated

  4. Omg yess!!! i cut to stop the crying when i feel it coming like a freaking train. Its like im afraid if i start crying uncontrollably i wont ever stop. I mean i cry like maybe after anyway but with cutting i feel like i have more of a control on it? Iduno..but i absolutely get that. Sometimes ill get my feelings hurt and it'll be minor but i still get the urge just to be in control of how im feeling. Like in a weird, you're not allowed to hurt my feelings, only im allowed to hurt myself. iduno..its weird and way crazy...>.< sorry yesssss i am the same way! absolutely this
  5. Anxiety makes my stomach gurgle like literally, im not hungry or anything and i can hear my stomach gurgling. its so embarrassing

  6. Drowning..and i'm trying to stay afloat

  7. Yess, I absolutely can relate to this wholeheartedly >.< its so hard. Im the same way ive stopped for a long period of time then it just happens and im back to being unable to control it except i feel like i set boundaries every time. This time since i have ballet i cant let myself cut anywhere that it could be brought to attention so thats limited my cutting by a lot maybe that can help cut it down set like a limit say okay no more than 5 here and stuff like that maybe bit by bit could help. I totally relate
  8. isolating myself should be my career, im great at it "/

    1. crtclms

      crtclms

      If only it were an Olympic sport. We'd have a really good team on CBs.

  9. yay, im glad there are responses i was afraid there wouldnt be any. @MndCDB, yeah you're definitely right about that. I do SH when im emotional. I think i do it to gain a control or handle on it. When im in that state i just keep falling and falling and you're super right i have to be extra careful cuz i feel it sometimes getting too carried away.."/ @0000000 I think i feel guilty because once the emotional part has passed i just have these wounds on the body part and since the moment has passed im able to really think and go did i need to do that. But when im in that state im spiraling so hard i just grasp onto anything. So the guilt comes from, now i have to hide these and it lets others know that i engage in that which is very looked down upon and considered "emo" and im not even in high school anymore im 24 @iaawal Yess exactly! thats how i am too. I tried wearing gloves today but since their new they were just irritated and stung >.< (theyre on both of my forearms.."/, so even typing is a little irritating cuz the keyboard brushes against them but i just regret it but last night i didnt--i couldnt @wooster thats intense to be able to SH while calm >.<
  10. Is there such thing as a mild form of Trichotillomania? I think i have that

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Ceicbot

      Ceicbot

      oh wow really? what is BFRB?

    3. cosima

      cosima

      "body focused repetitive behaviors." includes trich, dermatillomania, dermatophagia, etc.

    4. Ceicbot

      Ceicbot

      oh yeah that def sounds accurate

  11. Iduno, i was just thinking about how last night i SH..and how now i have to deal with the consequences. I think i always forget this part. its like in the moment its all so real and hard to bear and i forget that now i have to wait till this heals and stops being so sore. So i was looking for posts about that, talking about how people feel the day after they engage in SH. So i guess we can do that here. Just like does mood stabilize after, is it guilt everytime a pang of soreness rings through? I guess for me it does, i feel dumb for letting it get the better of me and then having to hide them while they heal. I always choose terrible spots so it makes doing anything kinda painful as well, like typing. *sigh* iduno
  12. Yup, Nonmilitary PTSDer here, i was kinda shocked when my therapist told me i had PTSD i def thought but i havent been in a war and come to find dont need to be >.< would love to share and just relate with others
  13. omg i relate so much to you! i also have PTSD not due to combat or child abuse but multiple traumas. It did start when i was a kid but continued in giant leaps up into my 20s (im 24 now) so yeah i dont feel like i fit in with the child abuse stuff >.<
  14. i was clean for awhile then..iduno like an avalanche it all just came back...and it feels here to stay
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