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About MooMeMa

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    New Hampshire
  • Interests
    Paranormal, writing, becoming an EMT/Paramedic, gaming, simming, watching fart videos on youtube.

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  1. My Mom is doing really good after her stroke...I am surprised but thankful. It was a massive one with a lot of bleeding and doctor's said it could be fatal...yet here she is a month later, alive and kicking...with one leg as of right now lol. She is mostly her old self but does have some moments of confusion and her attention span is a little wonky at times. We're waiting to get her into a skilled nursing facility for some rehab...which is taking longer than expected because the Medicaid folks took their sweet old time to approve the long-term extension which would allow more (and better) choices for a facility. 

    1. jt07


      That's GREAT news! Thanks for the update. I'm so happy to hear it.

  2. Well, my Mom is talking with a valve on her trach...she's there mentally but not there at the same time. She kept saying to me last night "Let's go" and when asked where she said the mental hospital. We asked who said we had to go there and she said the name of my old Psychiatrist (I feel awful because we kept asking for his name and it took so long for it to click in my head WHO she was saying). I feel so bad because she kept kind of pushing my hand as if she were pushing me out the door and saying "let's go". It was a bit trippy considering the time's she's remembering is from around 1999 - 2003ish. I get that her brain needs time to kind of rewire and heal so her memories are a mishmash of old and recent...IT's just going to take a bit of time to get her brain back on track. Although the Nurse did say worst-case scenario is that she stays the way she is now...which I mean, alive which is GREAT...but bedridden, with a urinary catheter and tube thing for number twos, with a damn PEG tube for tube feeding, memory all over the place with some decent moments of lucidity.

    What a fucking shit show. She has diabetes which is news to us and would be to her...I am so FUCKING ANGRY because ALL of this could have been prevented if she had gone to the doctor like we had been begging her to for months... I'm assuming the stroke was a complication of untreated diabetes which she could have been diagnosed and taking care of if she had freaking listened to us for once...ugh...

    1. jt07


      Well, you don't know that the stroke was the result of untreated diabetes. It could be, but it could not be also. I wouldn't get too angry over it because it is one of those things that is impossible to know. Not everybody with untreated diabetes has strokes.

      I'm glad your mom is making progress. It's going to take time, but I think she has made remarkable progress is a relatively short time. A stroke is severe and it just takes time. Given that this is the immediate aftermath of the stroke, and she has progressed I"d say she has a good chance of progressing further.

      Uncertainty is hard to deal with, I know. You are given essentially 3 outcomes: 1. She gets completely better. 2. She gets better but not completely or 3. She stays the same as she is now. And it is uncertain which it will be. Since you have no better reason to assume the worse over the best, it's better to focus on the good and forget about the bad. You might not even have to deal with the bad, but if you do you will have saved yourself a lot of worrying and bad feelings.

      Good luck to you and her, and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

  3. I just want my fucking Mom to get better and come home god fucking dammit. I honestly just wish somebody would blow my brains out right now because I don't know if I can deal with this shit much longer. 

    1. jt07


      I'm so sorry you are feeling like that. It's a lot to deal with and a lot of stress. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Hope your mom gets better soon.

  4. So it's been a week since my Mom had her stroke and aneurysm...She's slowly getting better, it seems. Her Nurse last night on the phone said my Mom spontaneously opened her eyes a couple of times which is fairly new and she was following commands again and also started giving a thumbs up when asked (albeit a little delayed but progress nonetheless). tomorrow we have a meeting with the caseworker and some doctors I guess to figure out what to do for the future and stuff...I keep fearing the worst, like they'll give some awful news and I'll just end up having a mental breakdown. 

    1. jt07


      That's great news! I doubt they will give some awful news since she is showing definite signs of improvement. I am happy to hear she is making progress.

      Be sure to take care of yourself too. 

    2. Gearhead


      Very glad to hear your mom is improving!

  5. So my Mom had an aneurysm/stroke at work Thursday...She is in the ICU now in what I suppose would be considered a coma...I honestly don't know if I will make it through this. I love her so much and miss her. I have horrible codependency issues and have relied on her my entire life for literally EVERYTHING. I can't live without her...she doesn't deserve this at all...she is a good, selfless person and I've treated her so horribly and done/said such terrible things to her that i will never forgive myself for. I need her to know how sorry I am and how much I love her....why is this happening?

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Gearhead


      I hope your mother recovers, Moo. Can you talk to her while she’s comatose? I’ve done that before. It’s surprisingly healing.

    3. Wooster


      Nobody deserves to have illness and suffering. However, they do seem to be part of what it means to be human.

      It's painful to watch someone you love have this kind of experience.

    4. San


      Wishing all the best to you and your mom. Trust me, she knows how much you love her and she's forgiven anything you've done. You're her world, too. You'll be in my thoughts, just know your mom knows much more than we'd think! You're a good person, wishing you comfort. Think about the good times. ❤️ and don't beat yourself up.

  6. I really am such a terrible person holy crap. 

  7. Me nearly every day of my life. I didn't have the "realization" until a couple of years ago when it just popped into my head sitting here one day...That I had no idea who I am as a person, what my true personality is, what my real opinions are on things. I'm always flip-flopping and forever stuck in that phase of "finding myself" by testing the waters. I realized then that I'm barely human at this point, and more of a shell of what I "once was" (I'm using that phrase loosely because even as a teenager, my depression & anxiety ruled over me so I have no clue what part of me was real or
  8. We're made to feel like shit every single day because nobody takes our problems seriously. People love to bitch and moan yet they never want any action taken to prevent horrible things from happening. The cycle will continue to repeat itself until SOMETHING is done.  (That something being better gun control AND mental health care).

  9. Mental illness needs to be taken more seriously! These fucking shootings will NEVER FUCKING STOP if people keep ignoring one of the big problems! Not all mentally ill people become homicidal maniacs but a lot do. Doing what these murderers do is NOT normal and people need to stop writing it off as "OH HE WAS JUST ANGRY" "OH WHO CARES STFU ABOUT THEM". I  got into a facebook argument because my Aunt refused to understand what I was saying...She kept spewing the same shit about "Oh I DON'T CARE IF HE WAS MENTALLY ILL I DON'T CARE THIS AND THAT INNOCENT PEOPLE DIED BLAH BLAH HE'S TO BLAME" yet I never said he wasn't to blame....Only that mental health care is horrible and too many people ignore obviously disturbed people. 

    Mental illness is seen as a joke by "normal" people. We get told to "get over it" or "stop feeling that way". These school shooters and serial killers always show signs of having issues but everyone around them writes them off. Add on a horrible mental health care system and it's a recipe for disaster...

  10. My Mother is pushing me to my limits. You'd think the reality of all these young people in town ( old friends or  classmates) dying and her friends losing their child would snap her to reality but I guess that's not the case. 

  11. I hope my brother dies in his sleep tonight. 

  12. Fuck...Two month until my birthday...Please no...I can't bare getting older. agh

  13. Having no thyroid gland sucks. Relying on hormone pills for the rest of my life sucks. Between my mental health issues and constantly fluctuating hormones, I've been a an awful crabby mess. I mean terribly moody and snapping at my Mom over EVERY little thing and just having 0 patience with every aspect of life. These mood swings are different than the one I experienced cuz of mental illness growing up...almost worse. It's driving me CRAZYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! lol

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