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aquarian

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Everything posted by aquarian

  1. I started filling out paperwork at my last job for an ADA accomodation to not have to work more than 40 hours a week. This was because OT had become somewhat mandatory for an extended period of time (not sure if it was officially mandatory OT for everyone in my department or somewhat voluntary with lots of pressure to volunteer and "chip in") but I skated by the whole time just working my usual 40 hours because I think my manager knew I was generally having issues (partly due to my dad being in the process of dying) and never once asked me or pressured me to work OT. However, when they hired someone new way above my manager (and this new person was on an OT mission because we were understaffed and not meeting our metrics), I think my manager had to start explaining why I wasn't working any OT at all. So then she gave me the ADA accomodation paperwork to fill out. Then, while I'm filling out this paperwork and having to write down and explain to HR why I can't work more than 40 hours a week, I realized how bad things had really become for me. I was working my 40 hours a week and getting nothing done except going to bed and going to sleep at the end of workdays M-F. And then I would sleep the entire weekend, only getting up to go to the bathroom and take snack breaks. I was like, oh shit, I'm worse off than I thought. And I'm barely hanging on at work as it was. So that was weird to put into words as my explanation for why I couldn't handle more than 40 hours a week. I think I did actually submit the paperwork, but I'm not sure. Not sure if I was (or would have been) granted the accomodation because pretty soon after the ADA stuff, I started going in/out on STD. Then I ended up on LTD. And now I'm on SSDI (disability). But I felt I had a good case for the accomodation because I was being treated by a psychiatrist, trying different meds, and I had no functioning life outside of my work week as it was. The thought of coming in on Saturdays was nuts to me. I was like, I sleep all of Saturday; how am I supposed to come in to work? Or staying an extra couple hours at the end of each day M-F...doesn't work so well when I have to sleep 12+ hours a night and am expected to shower, eat, and drive back into to work the next day. Plus, I was becoming less productive/functioning at work stuff and it would get progressively worse by the end of the day. So I'm not sure that I would have accomplished much by staying extra hours at the end of a shift. It was a great job and a great company. But it was bad timing as far as me being new in the job, my dept growing rapidly, my dad slowly dying at home, effexor pooping out, and other life stressors.
  2. Not sure if this has been mentioned already: When I go to my profile and choose "Posts" underneath the "Forums" heading in the left hand column, it only lets me look at the first page of results. Even when I click the number 2 (or another number) or the next button or the last page double right arrow button. Same issue with "All Activity" from my profile page and possibly others. I just checked those two. However, what does still work (as a workaround) is going to "Settings-Manage Followed Content" And looking at "Forums-Topics" in the left hand column. Then I can see all the pages and clicking on the numbers, etc. works.
  3. From the source you linked to/provided above: "It's important to note that neither of these studies was a randomized controlled clinical trial, so neither proved that either type of drug causes dementia."
  4. Effexor/Remeron/Valium has been my mainstay since 2002. (Well, it started as Effexor/Remeron/Xanax but after a year or two pdoc made me taper off the xanax and onto valium.) I remained totally stable med-wise and was mostly functional. But then around 2011-2012, shit hit the fan and my combo was no longer cutting it, so we added abilify and tried various dosages. I also tried swapping out effexor for pristiq but went back to effexor eventually. Also tried out latuda (maybe before or after abilify?). Not sure in what order all that happened and whether it was over the course of months or a year. Tried adding in some stimulant stuff eventually. Nuvigil was no help. Ritalin ok at best. Finally settled on adderall. Stayed on adderall for at least a couple years I think. One day a year or two ago, my pdoc says, why not add buspar to the mix? She said it probably won't do anything but can't hurt and might help with anxiety, right? So turns out buspar gave me some energy although did zero for anxiety (not sure how that works) so I told my pdoc it was time to stop the adderall since the buspar was superior and I was tired of the afternoon crashing from adderall among other things. So now I'm on effexor/remeron/valium/abilify/buspar. Pdoc has me try going up to 30mg remeron from 15mg at one point. No difference but I'm still on the 30mg btw. So more time passes. I'm frustrated that I'm not making any big "progress" and am still on SSDI and not working or volunteering. Pdoc says lets cross-taper from effexor to cymbalta. During the cross-taper, a bunch of minor life stressors occur and my panic disorder comes back after being mostly in remission for a decade. I stayed on cymbalta for a few months at least, maybe longer. Finally said, let me go back on effexor since cymbalta doesn't seem to be any better. So back to effexor yet again. And now more valium to help with the panic disorder. 2mg 3-4x/day so still a tiny dose but I was only taking about 1mg at night for years prior to this. And I still can't drive on my own due to panic. Can barely make it through a meal at a restaurant without panicking. Am exhausted after having to leave the house to do something in public. But still have to keep leaving the house and trying to drive with someone else in the car so that maybe, someday, I can get back to the old status quo, which I used to be dissatisfied with but would do anything now to get back to. So basically my cocktail can be stable for a decade. But then it can also be tinkered with and meds swapped in and out many times over the course of a few years. Hard to say since my concept of time is poor. And the more med changes and crazy, the more hazy things become in the rearview mirror.
  5. I'm not sure if it's just me but here's a very minor thing that I noticed a little while back: So I click on unread content and that works fine and I see unread content going back a certain number of hours, not sure how many hours but it's usually (but not always) sufficient. But when I click on the "load more activity" button at the bottom of this page, it gets stuck as "Loading" and a grayed out button. I'm not sure if this always used to happen or if it's new since the update. Maybe it's even already been mentioned.
  6. I found this thread in which Wooster had some good cautionary advice (i.e. things to be aware of): https://www.crazyboards.org/forums/index.php?/topic/78541-online-therapy/
  7. Also see (for further reading) : https://www.propublica.org/article/the-myth-of-drug-expiration-dates https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1395800/#__sec7title Cheap OTC stuff I tend to not use much beyond expiration, since it's cheap to replace. And I personally wouldn't take expired antibiotics or antivirals (I don't care what the Army Studies have shown in the 2nd link above)....unless of course the zombie apocalypse has occured, in which case expired antibiotics and antivirals are sounding a whole lot better to me. But other stuff that's expired doesn't worry me as I personally haven't had an issue with expired valium, xanax or effexor for instance. But usually my stuff might only be expired by 1-2 years at most. And it's stored under decent conditions. But that's just me and my experience.
  8. My pdoc will take my unused meds if they are in bottles with seals or in unopened blisterpacks, not past expiration date, and then she will give them to other needy patients. I've done this a couple times with her in the past.
  9. There was actually a bipartisan bill that was passed and signed into law in very late 2017 called "Stop Taxing Death and Disability" that (going forward) prevents the IRS from taxing the discharged student loan debt as income. It's just for people whose student loan debt was discharged in 2018 and beyond (to 2025 when the law apparently expires if not renewed). http://www.doverpost.com/news/20180102/coons-stop-taxing-death-and-disability-act-passed-into-law https://www.studentdebtrelief.us/news/discharging-student-loans-no-longer-taxable-income/ You can even tell that the student loan site removed the stuff about owing taxes on discharged loans from their FAQ section: Here's the current FAQ: https://www.disabilitydischarge.com/faqs (nothing about owing taxes on the discharged debt) The old FAQ in August 2017: https://web.archive.org/web/20170816224615/https://www.disabilitydischarge.com/faqs (Note there is a section for "Are there any tax implications after approval and discharge of my federal student loans?" which explains "The amount of the discharged debt will be considered income for federal tax purposes and possibly for state tax purposes. You may want to consult with a tax professional to determine how this may affect your personal taxes." This part no longer exists in the current FAQ.) Also, on the 2018 instructions for 1099-C, the IRS now instructs, "Student loans discharged on account of death or disability. Do not report these discharges on Form 1099-C." So apparently people are no longer issued 1099-Cs for this kind of debt discharge. https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/i1099ac.pdf
  10. I have one (from many years ago and it's still in). I rarely get headaches, both before and after the piercing. I still get the occasional minor headache (resolves if I take 2 aleve), just as I always have.
  11. When my insurance changed, my tdoc agreed to let me pay her what she used to get paid by my insurance plus what my copay was. So it used to be that between my insurance and my copay my tdoc was getting around $80/session. So when I changed insurance and she was no longer covered, she agreed to make her rate $80/session which I paid out of pocket. And instead of seeing her every week, I switched to every other week because I couldn't afford $80/week but $80 every two weeks was doable. Eventually my insurance changed yet again and now she's covered again and I can go every week and I pay about $18/session (the 20% medicare part B doesn't cover. I have a medigap plan too, but it's high deductible and I never hit it, so yes, I'm responsible for the 20% part B doesn't cover).
  12. Have you ever appealed all the way to a hearing? I was denied at the 2 lower levels but then finally approved at a hearing. I also know at least one person online who applied for Bipolar I who was denied even through the hearing stage but appealed to the Appeals Council, got a remand, and was approved at the remanded hearing. Long wait, but finally approved.
  13. I had to call the SSA 800# to ask when my next review would be because my SSDI benefit continuation letter did not indicate when it would be. But the 800# told me.
  14. If it makes you feel any better, I'm mid-30s (so relatively young in SSA years) and I think I started out as medical improvement expected, so there was pretty much zero chance on me getting a short form. I think I'm medical improvement possible now with a 3-year review schedule.
  15. Ok, so it sounds like you just need a way to cope better with the stress, which you mentioned in your first post. I had thought you might be exploring other options like changing the rep payee, but now it sounds like you are managing the finances ok, just not the stress of reviews. Is it an SSI financial review or medical review? I just went through a long form CDR for my own SSDI benefits, which was stressful. So I can somewhat relate in a sense, but to a lesser degree because it didn't get too extreme with me. I mainly just talked to my therapist about my concerns and my increase in anxiety and panic. She sort of reasoned things out with me. It helped a little. I'm hoping that the next CDR will affect me less now that I've been through one, I can reason with myself even more that I've already made it through one successfully. Unfortunately, it's just the nature of the beast with SSI and SSDI that periodically you have to undergo these types of reviews.
  16. There are organizational rep payees if you don't have someone trusted who can handle being a rep payee. I believe the organization would be authorized to take the lesser of 10% or $40 from the monthly benefit. https://www.ssa.gov/payee/NewGuide/toc.htm#About_Payee_Fees https://www.ssa.gov/payee/become.htm
  17. Also, don't forget that SSA has a new(ish) wage reporting app on the myssa website*. You can't use it yet if this is your first time reporting (they direct you to call or go into local office if you click on the button), but hopefully you can use it to report wages for a particular employer going forward after your first time reporting to a human (via phone or local office). This would also require you to set up a mySSA account if you don't already have one (I recommend this anyway). You can do that here: https://www.ssa.gov/site/signin/en/ I have not attempted working yet so I don't have any personal experience with this. But yes, call and report your wages, ask about using the online wage reporting app in the future, and always save all pay stubs and time sheets if you have them. Sometimes SSA does not get a detailed breakdown of your wages from your employer side and it can be helpful in some situations. And if you work a lot, be careful of months with 5 weeks or more than the usual number of pay weeks. I only say "be careful" because if you're trying to avoid using up a TWP or going over SGA, you might accidentally go over in a month with 5 weeks and an extra paycheck. Good luck with the part time sampling job! *https://blog.ssa.gov/new-wage-reporting-application/
  18. The title of the article is "Many People Taking Antidepressants Discover They Cannot Quit" with the blurb, "Long-term use of the medications is surging in the United States, according to an analysis by The Times. One reason: withdrawal symptoms that make it difficult to stop." I saw this article today too on my phone while waiting to pick up food. Saved it for later and read it just now. For me the more interesting angles in the article are mentioned in passing but not explored. The article is primarily fouced on the withdrawal issue (including mention of brain zaps), while the more interesting stuff (to me) was just touched upon briefly. There is also this little bit from the middle of the article that I'm glad they acknowledged (but again, don't explore further even though I was quite interested in knowing more about who is this subset of users is and the debate among doctors about the size of the subset): "Still, it is not at all clear that everyone on an open-ended prescription should come off it. Most doctors agree that a subset of user benefit from a lifetime prescription, but disagree over how large the group is." https://nyti.ms/2EsK4hZ (permalink)
  19. I got medicare immediately too after my SSDI approval following a hearing. The months you were waiting for a hearing count as long as the judge didn't change your onset date. My understanding is that basically, any month for which you receive SSDI backpay counts toward the 24 months needed for medicare eligibility.
  20. Showed my mom the Bowie bubble wrap one. Her first impression was it looks like a decapitated Bowie head with bubble wrap.
  21. All I could find via some quick google searches: WHO guidelines: Accept Individuals with anxiety disorders or mood (affective) disorders (e.g. depression, bipolar disorder), provided they are generally in good health and are not obviously over-anxious, depressed or manic when seen on the day of donation, regardless of medication Defer permanently Individuals with psychotic disorders requiring maintenance treatment http://www.who.int/bloodsafety/publications/WHOguidelinesblooddonorselectionAnnex3.pdf https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK138205/ Interesting federal case against a blood plasma center in Utah (though this deals with selling plasma vs donating blood): "As part of Octapharma’s donor eligibility determination, Mr. Levorsen 1 was required to undergo a physical examination during which he revealed that he was taking the medication Geodon for borderline schizophrenia disorder.... "Based upon Mr. Levorsen’s disclosure, Octapharma informed him that he would be unable to donate source plasma. The basis for refusal was Octapharma’s assertion that during the donation process Mr. Levorsen might have a schizophrenic episode and “pull the needle collecting blood out of his arm and hurt him-self and/or others.” (doc. 1, ¶16). As a result, Octapharma placed Mr. Levorsen’s name on the “National Donor Deferral Registry” (“NDDR”) thereby marking him as an individual unfit to donate and ensuring his inability to donate plasma at any donation center in the nation. "On May 23, 2013, Mr. Levorsen provided Octapharma with paperwork from his treating psychiatrist, Dr. Benjamin Thatcher, and from psychiatrist Dr. Christopher Davis. Both doctors agreed that Mr. Levorsen was “medically suitable” to donate plasma two times per week (doc. 1, ¶19). However, despite the psychiatrists’ clearance, Octapharma informed Mr. Levorsen that because of his borderline schizophrenia disorder he would remain on the NDDR. As a result of Octapharma’s actions, Mr. Levorsen remains unable to donate source plasma and has been deprived of the $260.00 monthly income that his plasma donations previously provided (doc.1, ¶21). On April 30, 2014, Mr. Levorsen filed his complaint against Octapharma alleging a variety of claims based on violations of Title III of the ADA and seeking both declaratory and injunctive relief (doc.1, ¶21)." .... "Based hereon, the court concludes that Octapharma, a plasma donation center, does not qualify as a place of public accommodation as contemplated under the ADA and therefore Octapharma is not subject to 42 U.S.C. § 12182. Accordingly, Octapharma’s Motion To Dismiss is hereby GRANTED (doc. 10)." https://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/USCOURTS-utd-2_14-cv-00325/pdf/USCOURTS-utd-2_14-cv-00325-1.pdf They appealed and the case was remanded: "The district court concluded that plasma-donation centers (PDCs) aren’t service establishments because, unlike section 12181(7)(F)’s enumerated examples, PDCs don’t provide a service to the public in exchange for a fee. The Tenth Circuit found this "superficial distinction" irrelevant. Under the plain language of section 12181(7)(F), a PDC was a "'service establishment' for two exceedingly simple reasons: It’s an establishment. And it provides a service." Because the district court erred in concluding otherwise, and in dismissing the underlying action on that basis, the Tenth Circuit reversed and remanded for further proceedings." https://us10thcircuitcourtofappealsopinions.justia.com/2016/07/12/levorsen-v-octapharma-plasma/ (Very) short article about the case: https://www.courthousenews.com/schizophrenic-man-has-case-over-donation-ban/ https://www.reuters.com/article/octapharma-plasma-ada/plasma-donor-rejected-for-schizophrenia-can-sue-under-ada-10th-circuit-idUSL1N19Z0BF
  22. Sorry if my post came across badly. I was just playing devil's advocate I guess. Most of the nonfiction I've read that had little takeaway is what I would call nonfiction "lite" (maybe there's an actual term for this?). Not all of what I consider nonfiction "lite" has no takeaway, but I've stumbled across a few.
  23. I've read a few nonfiction books that I've gotten almost zero takeaway from. Don't ask me for titles because my memory sucks. Plus, I gained almost nothing from reading them which makes them poor candidates to take up limited memory space. But yeah, nonfiction's no guarantee.
  24. SSDI is sometimes offset by California state disability. But if you fall into the group who can collect both, then try not to feel guilty because it's there for a purpose.
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