Jump to content


  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

1 Follower

About Laftaf

  • Rank

Profile Information

  • Gender

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Laftaf


    Hi thoughts, So your thinking, It may be better just to not call, and just wait until you have the money to pay? I'm trying to weigh my options right now. I'm in a bad situation so I will take all advice right now. JT, I guess it couldn't hurt to call right? Hmmm, I will be officially homeless tomorrow, so I think I will have to start getting things done.it's like I have to force myself to fix mess that I created. Thanks, for the idea....
  2. Laftaf


    Do you mean the bank where your credit card is from? You just call them up and say that you can't pay?
  3. Laftaf


    Awwwh, thank you. I will definitely need it.
  4. A long time ago, when I took Citralopram, I had that same feeling tooo, of just like a blah fog, if that's the right way to describe it. I only took it for a short while but I didn't like it, so I stopped. Perhaps the side effects will get better with time?
  5. Laftaf


    Well it looks like I am going to be homeless for awhile. It's all my doing because of the poor choices I made due to my depression. I am currently trying to reduce my stuff so it will fit in my care and basically, I will have to live out of it for awhile. It is slow going on my resume, but I am still trying to get it completed. If anyone has any good thoughts, or tips on living out of your car, please let me know. This is not something I have done nor thought I would be doing at my age, but I gotta make it work somehow. It is kind of sad to be getting rid of a lot of my stuff, well I did purge about a year ago, but I also feel kind of liberated by not having the things, I am a "shopper" and not in a good way, The stuff that I have is not high quality, but I did realize one thing today, It is that, I tend to buy things for "the life I want." and not for the life that I have now.and since I am in no circumstance to even start having that nicely decorated apartment type life, I just had to donate a few boxes of things. I have to keep remember to only buy for the life that I have right now. The one good thing about this forced purge ( my stuff really isn't worth the money to put it into storage) is that I am turning into a minimalist very quickly. Although, I am a bit tearful right now because I messed up again and now I have to live the consequences. So if you can send me good thoughts because I am a bit scared of living in my car especially at night. I have been reading blogs and such about the subject, and it can be done, but I think It wil be rocky.
  6. I did like Natures Calm. It tasted good and fizzy, and it did help me relax/sleep. I stopped taking it because it was a big glass of liquid right before bed which made me get up in the middle of the night to urinate. Plus it was a bit expensive, but if I had a choice, I would take it again. Glad you like it!
  7. I'm not sure if anyone is going to just admit that have been looking through windows. Just start taking steps to make the situation more comfortable for you. By starting a conversation with him about his whereabouts, you can kind of start dropping hints like, "Wow, can you really see ALL that from you window,?" "Do other people walk a lot too, or just me?" Just to start pointing out some things that you are noticing....... Whatever he seems to be doing, seems pretty low key, since none of his activities right now seem to be solid enough to land him a formal reprimand or anything..... I guess it all depends on how you want to make yourself comfortable in all of this. You could vary your walking routing, start documenting uncomfortable incidents, stay in public places. talk to his wife..... Minimize the impact this person has on your life until it there are more permanent solutions available.
  8. Can you try and introduce yourself, the next time you see him, by his truck? Something like, " Oh, hey there, I thought I noticed you outside the window the other day, so it's nice to put a name to the face.' all cheery like. Or maybe, " I notice you out by the window, the other day, it seemed so hot, and I felt bad for anybody that has to be outside for so long....... with that sympathetic smile on your face. Maybe then he'll know that you are aware of him looking into the window....... Just a thought I am putting out there.
  9. I saw this quote and I really liked it. "Books are like people, in a sense that they will come into your life when you need them." --Emma Thompson--
  10. I was wondering how did you "get" the compound form, since there were no doctor's nearby? I looked into Ketamine clinics in the bigger cities, but right off the bat, I knew I wasn't going to be able to afford it. However this nasal spray thing, I've never heard of, and it sounds interesting.
  11. I hope that you and your doctor can figure out why you and the guy are in such a habitual pattern of making plans and then cancelling.It might be fun to meet up with him one day.
  12. Yeah, I haven't gotten into the visualizations quite yet. But I am sure one day, suddenly it will just interest me, and I'll really get into it. I do short meditations, and those sleep hypnosis videos are really good for me lately. ( and free:) ). I can use all the people, beings, or whatever looking over me right now that is for sure!.
  13. I wasn't raised with religion or faith based, but the way things are in my life, I will take anything. I have been suffering from depression which has been paralyzing my life to the point that my finances are dire and my living situation will change in about 2 weeks. Treatment is not an option, for me right now, but in the past I have tried medicines and therapy and active listening websites/hotlines with very little success or sense of satisfaction. I live an isolated life and do not have support like family or friends so I am on my own for all of this which makes it really hard for me. Anyway, I do know that I need to get a job, but cannot find the motivation to make a resume and start the process. For months now I have known that things are going bad but all I could do is avoid everything. I have been trying to fight my depression by doing things that are "free" like journaling, meditation, cardio, researching, mindfulness etc..... but I do know that aside from medicines and therapy, what I really needed was encouragement or belief, or "sign" or something, that everything is going to be ok. I mean, it gets tiring having to figure everything out on my own and truly I am tired. Every once in awhile, I would like someone to say," I'll take care of this, don't worry." But instead, I know that is not going to happen. There is no one looking out for me except, for me. Unfortunately, I seem to have a strong instinct for self preservation, or just extreme cowardice so it looks like I am stuck here on earth. So, one day, I was listening to the radio in my car, I'm not much into music, so I rarely listen to anything new. But what came on right away, was Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive" song. I know that it is a break up song, and relationships have no place in my life right now, but I have always liked that song, and she sings that one chorus, "I will Survive" with such feeling........ Since literally, I have nothing else, I'll take it. I will take it as "my sign" that someone or something IS watching over me, (I always like to think that maybe my Dad who died a long time ago, is just sending me a little message.). I know that everyone has different beliefs, but I have been conditioned all my life to look only for the bad, or negative things in life, I figure, looking for something good in my life, really couldn't make things any worse than they already are for me.
  14. I have called a well known national hotline, and if they truly think that you will harm yourself, then they will track you down, and send the police out to come an talk with you. That being said, it took a few hours after the phone call, so if you are presentable and rational enough by that time, to answer the door when they do knock, then it is pretty quick and easy to say the right things and the police will leave, without any reports and such. I tried them a couple days in a row when I was in crisis a few years ago, and they were always busy so I could never get through to chat with them online.er Also I forgot, I did call a smaller local crisis line and had a good experience with them.
  • Create New...