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About PsychoticSpazzDude

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  1. I cannot stop burning myself cause my emotional pain is so severe. I can't goo to the doctor cause they might put me in a mental hospital for the mentally ill cause I am mentally ill. I am so sad cause my family hasn't called me yet. My group home staff doesn't know about it that I am doing it again but that was scratching myself with a safety pin. I burn to feel the pain and I am in control of it. I have alot of problems and the main one is schizoaffective disorder. I don't know what type if its depressive or bipolar but when I get so happy it spins out of control then when I get down fast it goes downhill like a emotional roller coaster. I hate myself and to live with that feeling. My life it can mean gold and it can also mean depression of dark clouds over my head. I think I need to burn more so I can be in control of myself. I keep it as a secret cause I don't want to be back in that state hospital it was scary when I used to be in there.
  2. I burn my legs alot on top of my thigh to make sure no one will look there at it. I thought I was done hurting myself but then I started again it has been almost years that I don't hurt myself. I can't do anything right at all.I rarely have time to smile most of the times. I can be a emotional rollercoaster. My mental disorders are such tough time time to deal with. I have schoziaffective disorder and other troubles. I can't stop doing it. I am hurting badly but oh well like anyone would care and to write a letter on this messenge. Not that anyone would care.
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