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About Juniper29

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  1. First of all, I'm so sorry about your mother's cancer diagnosis. I know the awfulness of the uncertainty. My dad was diagnosed with cancer shortly before the pandemic happened. Fortunately they were able to do surgery to remove his. My husband was also in the hospital last year for an ongoing health issue that took a while for the doctors to figure out and that was incredibly stressful, in a different way. I'm a recovered cutter, so I get that, too, and how the urges come back when things are stressful. I don't know that I have anything really helpful to say, but I'm here.
  2. I have several family members who are convinced that positive thinking can rewire your brain and cure depression. It has helped them with their stuff, and I'm glad for them. But I'm having a hard time with being told to do these practices when I'm symptomatic. Being told to say affirmations or practice being grateful for things when intrusive thoughts are telling me I should be dead doesn't make me feel better. It makes me feel like they think I'm a negative person who doesn't appreciate what I have and that that's why I'm struggling. Does anyone have thoughts on this? I don't want to dis
  3. I find it helpful because I can't accurately remember how I was doing for more than the past day or so ... like if I'm currently doing fine I'll forget how badly I was doing just a few days earlier. Using the app allows me to give a more accurate picture of how things have been to my tdoc/pdoc when I see them. It also means I can look and see that my mood's been trending down for several weeks when it seems like only a day or two (or vice versa). The one I use allows me to track sleep, exercise, my cycle, anxiety level, medication changes or when I've taken my PRN, etc.
  4. I have one hooded sweatshirt that I wear pretty much all the time. It apparently annoys some family members (so I'm told ...).
  5. The only side effect I've had was some mild sedation when starting or increasing the dose. I take 300 mg twice a day.
  6. I'm not bipolar but have MDD and anxiety. It definitely helps me. My pdoc says in her experience it's hit or miss, really helps some people and others not at all. I take 300 mg twice a day.
  7. I didn't see this until now, but I take gabapentin for anxiety. It's an off-label use but it's been very effective for me. I take 600 mg daily, divided into two doses. Like you I started with 100 mg at night.
  8. I felt similarly when I was your age, except I didn't think I'd make it to my 20s. I'm in my 30s now and obviously still dealing with depression, but I have a pretty good life and a lovely family that I am happy and grateful for much of the time. It sounds like your medication may not be doing the best it could. It's hard to advocate for yourself when you're depressed, but can you talk to your pdoc about how you feel?
  9. Hi, I have not taken lyrica but I do take gabapentin for anxiety. pregabalin (lyrica) and gabapentin (neurontin) are related, from what I understand; they are both anticonvulsants used to treat nerve pain. I actually started taking gabapentin for shingles pain and discovered it was amazing for my anxiety, so pdoc took over the prescription. It works for me really well.
  10. Hi. I think the only rule is you can't actually promote self-injury. And we try to avoid really graphic descriptions since it can be triggering. But you don't have to self-injure in any particular way to post here. It's not the most active board ever but there are good people here.
  11. We will gather with family via Zoom. My family is mostly out of state and traveling isn't safe.
  12. I don't know if this is the same, but even when my mood is good I have very little energy. I use up most of it on ADLs (making food, brushing teeth, taking care of my kid's basic needs) and struggle with anything additional like cleaning or organizing fun activities. I spend a lot of the day curled on the couch even at the best of times.
  13. I also don't like the number scale. There are too many factors. Mild/moderate/severe is better, but I still struggle with knowing which it is. Detailed descriptions of which symptoms warrant a given level could be helpful.
  14. Thanks, that's helpful. I feel like I have to say something .. age appropriate of course ... My mom is bipolar so I've been through it from a child's perspective and that makes it harder in some ways.
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