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Selkie

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Everything posted by Selkie

  1. I've only been able to try the half capsules so far, bc of my med anxiety...I think I'll try the full 10 tomorrow or on the weekend. Needless to say I felt nothing on the 5...maybe a tiny bit thirstier. I had another q I wondered if you could shed light on: people talk a lot about ADHD stimulant meds inhibiting creativity, and to some extent making people feel less interested in other people...I didn't find that the case with wellbutrin, (although, weirdly, I found I was maybe *slightly* less funny?) but it is something I worry about with the stimulants. Is there a reason behind this? Don't worry: I'm going to try it regardless, and see what it does for me. I know lots of writers/artists etc take ADHD meds and do fine. I'm hoping it will even help, in that in the past few years my motivation, concentration, stamina etc have been so bad I haven't been really writing anyway..
  2. @Iceberg & @browri honestly thank you both so much for explaining this to me!!! It's actually really helpful to have *both* of your explanations, they complement each other and clarify each other
  3. If either of you have the time, can you explain how wellbutrin is different from stimulants? Like...is wellbutrin MORE stimulating than stimulants, and if so why are stims controlled while wellb is handed out no problem?
  4. Thank you, this is really good to hear!! I like the idea that it will be easier to tolerate that wellbutrin. I'm also doing my best to take your advice and not think about it, I took half a capsule today and I'm just going to try as hard as I can to pretend I didn't take anything. Lol, I hadn't yet...but I did this morning, I opened the capsule and took half, but probably got less than half bc I think some powder got lost in me obsessively trying to halve it properly...so let's say I took 4mg 😎. I've never taken adderall so the comparison doesn't do much, but I do know that even 10mg is really really low. My doctor said it's a low pediatric dose, and I think he gave it to me because he knows I'm anxious about meds. I'm hoping I don't really feel anything today and can try the 10mg tomorrow. I feel this about the fall/winter! Thanks for the update, I'm glad you're doing mostly well. I can imagine that there have been a lot of ups and downs in adjusting to the different doses, and it's probably a relief to feel like you've found something that feels stable. But yeah, I can completely understand fearing what the winter will do for your depressive symptoms. But if anyone is well equipped to figure out what you might add it's you, and it seems like you have a really smart and supportive pdoc. Wishing you all the best as always ❤️
  5. @IcebergYeah, that makes sense. You don't sound like a parent, it's good advice...I'm pretty reliant on "un-verified" sites because I feel like people with lived experience in a lot of ways know more than doctors and I want to know what I'm getting into with a new med. But you're totally right...it's a big pattern for me that I read too much and talk myself out of taking it. Or I'll read 6 amazing reviews and one bad one and the bad one will freak me out so much I can't take the med 😕 I really appreciate you sharing your experience. That's really interesting that stimulants have reduced your anxiety while wellbutrin made it worse...I sort of thought wellbutrin must be "milder" than a stimulant bc it's not as controlled, much easier to get prescribed etc. But I guess it is more complicated than that. Anyway, thanks so much for your input ❤️
  6. Hi @browri - I haven't been on here in a long time. Mainly been focusing lately on getting off clonazepam by switching to diazepam and doing a long, slow taper. I'm also seeing a new psychiatrist who I really like. He diagnosed me (at 36) with adhd, inattentive. This wasn't shocking to me, I've suspected it a long time, but was kind of major is that he thinks a lot of my depression and maybe even some anxiety could actually be/have been the untreated adhd (though I also have ocd which is more or less in "remission", and he thinks that's separate). Anyway, he's prescribed me 10mg vyvanse to start...and I've had the bottle like...over a month, and I'm afraid to start taking it. This is not uncommon for me, I think I mentioned before that new meds freak me out, and I have bottles of stuff that I literally never took. But I've never tried a stimulant before and I remember learning that they can actually cause less anxiety than eg. wellbutrin (which worked great for my depression and some motivation/focus, but increased obsessions and some intrusive thoughts). My pdoc said I am welcome to open the capsule and take half or even less of the powder my first time if it makes me feel safer, which it does. But then I googled microdosing amphetamines and I found a reddit post where a bunch of people were saying this can cause horrible adverse effects...but maybe that's over a long term? Anyway: I was going to try half the capsule or so today, but then I read that, and now it's 9:15 am and I think that's too late to take something that might cause insomnia. I noticed you take this med, at 40mg, and I wondered if you had any insight on how I might feel taking 5mg to start, or less, and if it's safe to do that for one or two days (it's for me really a psychological trick of making sure it's safe or something, and then I can take the normal dose usually the next day). I realise 10mg is already a sub-therapeutic dose for adults.... Even a bit of encouragement would be nice honestly... 😣 How is your journey going? Hope you're doing okay.
  7. Hi there, I've posted here before on the depression med boards, I have been diagnosed all my life with MDD and various anxiety disorders (OCD, GAD, phobias). I recently started seeing a new psychiatrist - the first time I've actually HAD a psychiatrist in like...15 years maybe? Since then it's just been my GP. Anyway he diagnosed me with ADHD inattentive, and said that while he believes those other diagnoses were probably apt at the time, the ADHD might be the most significant...might have caused a lot of the depression etc. He said he thinks I've had it my whole life, and it's just been missed. I'm 36 so this was pretty eye-opening (though I've suspected ADHD it was still kind of big to hear it from a pdoc). Anyway, he prescribed vyvanse 10mg to start...and, as is common for me, I'm scared to take it. The best med that worked for my depression and motivation & focus was wellbutrin, but it increased some of my OCD symptoms. I've heard various things about stimulants compared to wellbutrin...some have said they're actually better on anxiety. I'd love to hear from people with ADHD and anxiety, how they've reacted to stimulants. Did you need something to counter-balance it, or were you ok on stimulants alone? The only other med I'm currently on is diazepam, as part of a long slow taper to get me off benzos. Open to adding other meds eventually but not benzos. Nothing against them though, I just had a specific experience and can't take them anymore. Thanks
  8. Hi @browri - I haven't logged on in a while, I was visiting my gf in the states and now we're quarantined in Canada. I actually have an appointment (remote) with a brand new pdoc tomorrow, which I am really optimistic about, he has a very good reputation and I'm really grateful to finally be able to talk to a psychiatrist directly, without going through my GP. How are you feeling after a month on pristiq? I've been on effexor before, years and years ago - do you find it to feel different from that one?
  9. Sorry just saw this part! I hope the 150 is working for you. I've always felt that it's a pretty decent dose, I think I've even lamented that there's no bupropion 100XL. But of course everyone is different. I'm super familiar with the wellbutrin chewing. Weirdly, it started for me when I was on the med in like, 2018, and I stopped because it was so bad - grinding my teeth in the daytime almost like a tic. Didn't really go away. Now it goes away when I'm ON wellbutrin and comes back when I'm off, which I can't figure out. Usually only flares up during extreme anxiety/stress, and I can mostly get it under control with breathing etc. I found buspirone completely useless for anxiety or anything to do with mood, but fwiw a low dose (I think 15mg/day) did cut the bruxism from wellbutrin.
  10. This is really helpful, thank you. My mom almost definitely would have been on it with an SSRI, but I will ask her. If I'm understanding right, you think that without an SSRI on board, the weight gain might not be such an issue on something like abilify? Sadly I had to pause bupropion for now. It was giving me really extreme obsessive thoughts and 2X daily panic attacks. My GP has finally, after years of asking, referred me to a psychiatrist who hopefully I'll be able to see regularly, rather than always going through the one at my doctor's office, who also refuses to think outside the box and listen to me. I'm considering that a low dose antipsychotic or mood stabilizer on its own, or maybe with bupropion again once my major anxiety triggers are a little bit more managed could be good. I just can't do an SSRI or SNRI ever again (mostly due to being put on them starting around age 13, and then throughout my entire teens and early twenties, and feeling traumatized by the way that affected sexual development, and....the unforgettable effexor withdrawals due to being a disorganized teen), and I want a pdoc who will respect that. So fingers crossed. Also curious about what the neuro-chemical difference between a mood stabilizer and an antipsychotic even is, if you have the energy to break that down for me? As always, thanks so much. I hope you're feeling well. ❤️
  11. @browri thank you so much for the update! I don't check this site too often, but I'd be curious to hear what you landed on! Right now I'm still just on bupropion xl 150, and clonazepam prn for anxiety, which I'm taking at least once and often twice a day. Long term goal for both me and more so for my doctors is to get the clonazepam to be closer to a couple times a week, but at least my doctors are understanding that maybe the pandemic isn't the best time to make such a change. I had a consult with the pdoc who works with my doctor on Thursday... He thinks I should stay on the bupropion more consistently (I tend to start and stop taking it more often than is really advisable), and find a good, tolerable augment for anxiety. His main suggestions were just adding a classic SSRI - I've been very very anti SSRI/SNRI for myself since they all seem to cause what I consider intolerable sexual side effects. I think also because I started taking them when I was a teenager (paxil around 14 I think, effexor 16-20 or so), and I didn't know about SSE, I just thought I was "broken". But he said that since I've never tried an SSRI *with* bupropion, it's worth seeing if it would counteract these. I'm still nervous, especially because I have a new girlfriend, lol, but he's right that if it would just cut the anxiety and the bupropion would do its thing for SSE, that would be great. His second line recc was abilify, which I know my mom took and loved the effects of but had very significant and rapid weight gain. Seems common. However, the wellbutrin might counteract that too. I just have heard really mixed things about this drug. Lamictal he didn't seem to keen on for anxiety, but I think they'd let me try it if I was really adamant. A big problem for me is that I'm very anxious to start new meds, I often go fill the prescription and then never take even one pill, so my doctor said she wants me to wait until I'm ready to actually give something a try...oof. I might need to bring that up with my therapist and work on a plan to get me to actually try a new drug 😕 ....is there a med that you can take to make you not scared to take new meds, lol. Anyway thanks so much for your support, this is nice to be able to talk about. I'm in some facebook groups for meds, but no one is going into nearly this much depth. I hope you're finding something that works for you! ❤️ Oh oops I saw your last post was just on Wed! I guess you're still checking out the 30mg mirtazapine... I hope it's still feeling good!
  12. @browri - I am still waiting for my next appointment. I live in Canada, and it's very difficult to actually get to see a psychiatrist, I have to talk to my family doctor and then she talks to the pdoc, but I requested a direct consult with him since I haven't had one in over a year, and my symptoms have changed drastically during the pandemic. In the meantime I've actually gone off wellbutrin because my anxiety was getting so bad.... but now my motivation and energy are totally shot. I really wish this wasn't the tradeoff, I love the way wellbutrin gives me focus, energy, patience, positive outlook etc. But I was finding I was getting even some pure O OCD symptoms which I haven't really had in many years (like, since childhood....so that's weird). I feel like your remeron/bupropion combo sounds really promising - how are you feeling on it now that it's settled in again? It's super interesting to read about the way the drugs are and are not complementary - I feel like my main doctor (GP) is just like "buspar is for anxiety so it will lessen the anxiety of wellbutrin", but it seems like that's not really accurate. Honestly you have more knowledge and care than any doctor I've ever talked to! When you say if I switched from wellbutrin to lamictal I'd feel quite different...what do you mean by that? Or like...how I'd feel different?
  13. @browri OMG thank you, I missed this alert, going to have a thorough read now - I appreciate this so much!
  14. Yeah that makes sense. FWIW I wasn't thinking of stopping the wellbutrin and starting lamictal at the same time. I guess I really want to try lamictal because it's different from anything I've taken, weight neutral, seems to have a pretty low side effect profile (other than "the rash") and although it's not first line for anxiety it seems to have good off label reviews for anxiety and unipolar depression....just one of those things where I feel like "I want to try that med" but don't have enough backup or evidence to advocate for myself w the doctor. Thanks for the help and listening 🙂🙏
  15. @Iceberg is there a reason for gabapentin over lyrica ? the doctor said that lyrica is basically a newer/less side effects version of gabapentin...
  16. LOL wow yes edamame would be a bizarre se indeed!!!! Thanks for the extra tag )
  17. Also curious about augmenting with a tricyclic ? (I am done with SSRI's SNRI's so those aren't an option)....Can anyone explain or point me to a thread that helps explain why tricyclics have fallen out of fashion/what the big differences are between those and SSRIs?
  18. Thanks @CrazyRedhead, I take clonazepam too but my new young GP doesn't want me to keep taking it, which is really annoying, and so we're trying to find something else 😕
  19. As ever if @browri or @mikl_pls has the time and energy to chime in I'd love to hear about the pharmacology of these 3 options! But also no pressure if not, of course!!!
  20. Hi again everyone, I'm looking for an augmentation strategy for bupropion XL 150, which helps tremendously with my depression, but worsens anxiety (GAD/obsessive worry)...I had OCD as a kid and I find bupropion brings up some of those old symptoms, mostly thoughts not compulsions, but I don't want to go off it because I love what it does for my mood, motivation and patience. I don't have access to a regular pdoc but there's one who works with my GP who I've requested to see, but usually my GP just prescribes and clears things w the pdoc. Last time I saw him the pdoc suggested buspar, which I have tried for a number of months at 20 then 25 mg/day and it doesn't seem to do anything for the anxiety, helps a bit with bruxism though. His other suggestions were remeron but I'm super afraid of weight gain or lyrica/pregabalin, which sounds like it has a lot of weird side effects like edema and cognition stuff. I'm an artist and I am especially reluctant to try anything that dampens creativity and thinking. I've been curious to try lamictal for a long time but my GP is always like "you're not bipolar", but I know lots of people do take it for unipolar depression....any chance it would help with anxiety? I would be open to either augmenting or replacing the bupropion w this one... Any thoughts would be so helpful!!! Thank you!!!
  21. Hi there all, I'm currently taking wellbutrin 150xl/day, as well as 20mg Buspar....I've posted about this before but back at it: Wellbutrin helps my depression a lot, but does amp up my anxiety a little bit, I have anxiety anyway and it's not so much worse that it feels like I should stop the wellb...but it's definitely there. The buspar is supposed to be augmenting it but as far as I can tell it does....nothing. Talked to my doc yesterday, she suggested upping the buspar to 30/day, which I am going to try. Her next recc was lyrica - kind of confused about this med? Does anyone have experience with it for anxiety? Would love to hear experiencess!!! Thanks so much!
  22. Wow, this is all so fascinating!!! Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge!
  23. Thank you so much @browri, this is super helpful and also very interesting! I love that you have all this knowledge. I'm curious about lamictal's similarity to ketamine in terms of being glutamatergic - lamictal is one of the drugs that also appears as being contra-indicated for ketamine treatments (infusions, or in the case of the clinic I'll be going to, sublingual). Is that because it would just cause an overflow of glutamate? I don't take lamotrigine but it's one I've been curious about for a while, interested in to what extent it's going to work similarly to the ketamine treatments. Again, thanks so much!
  24. Hey thanks @Iceberg , after reading as much as I can find, I have decided to wait. The thing is there's not a ton of research about it, so since it's safe they just say it might affect the ketamine's effectiveness, but they don't really know to what extent, and since it's safe they just say go ahead with it or not take the klonopin 24 hours before, but I can't really do that right now. I don't have a regular pdoc, I live in Canada, where psychiatrists are really hard to get access to, I have a GP who works with a psychiatrist as part of their network, but it's impossible to actually talk to him, always have to go through my GP.
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