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aurasnow

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About aurasnow

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  1. Became so painful and unbearable that I reduced dosage. Much better but mind you I’m only at 50mg so going to need to add something else as it appears I can’t tolerate high doses of Lamictal. Three attempts (years apart) to go up to 75/100 with severe headaches, cognitive issues and muscle aches even 2 months after titration up. Strange on such a low dose. Now back on the merry go round trying to find something effective for anxiety that doesn’t also send me hypo...
  2. Yeah rubbish news, from first hand experience offers instant relief from depths of depression. Was always uncertain about it being used as a long term thing though based on acquaintances with addiction issues and clear side effects from long term use on cognition, memory and even emotional processing...
  3. The headaches usually are accompanied by significant issues with cognition, a kind of feeling that my neck muscles are losing strength (a kinda droopy neck drifting off feeling) and often tingling at extremities, as well as severe depersonalisation/déréalisation (there anyways but worsened). Keep in mind the cognition issues, mood issues, anxiety, tinnitus and low level headaches are always there just worsen during these bursts of head things (not sure what to call them anymore tbh). Im concerned too. Pdoc is treating it as migraine, so far unsuccessfully, have been waiting over 4 months to see a neurologist. Luckily EEG clear but still can’t be good...
  4. I have had basic inspections at optometrists who have checked for retinal things etc in the past when headache symptoms were an issue and it appears all was fine. I have 20/20 vision. Thyroid check has always been one of those things I’ve meant to do over the years but never did, probably thinking “ah it’s just mental health”. More importantly, doctors have never suggested...
  5. Anyone have any thoughts on this predicament? Alongside the headaches I have severe cognitive issues that seem to come in waves and accompany an aura or head pain. Lowering Lamictal dose helped with headaches and cognition, but strange as on such a low dose, and still haven’t subsided entirely...
  6. Since upping my lamictal dose (only to 75) I gradually noticed increading strange muscular pains and cramps, akin to what I imagine arthritis to be like. I obviously have noticed that lamictal side effects tend to dissipate after a while after a dosage change, and of course had much more intense pains, headaches and other such things around the increase time howhever these particular ones appeared after the initial S/E subsided and have progressively worsened. These are focused on my legs, primarily my calf and knee joints, and have affected my gait. Alongside this I've notices strange muscular twitches and sharp pains, primarily in the leg areas but occasionally other muscle areas. I have noticed there is some info and muscle pain does seem to be a known side effect of lamictal, but was wondering if anyone has experience in treating this? Am wondering whether to reduce dose, which is a difficult choice as 75 is the highest dose I've been able to tolerate and is still pretty subtherapeutic. I should probably note on the list of odd side effects that I also have a crazy range of odd head, neck and jaw pains, alongside ocular aura w/out migraine (like a dull pain behind the eye accompanied with a feeling of a round orb or spot sorta behind vision), although these are harder to pin on the lamictal... Fun times...
  7. Am pretty much housebound due to the pain and agorophobia at this stage so any changes are probably a good change. Keep in mind I was what I thought was relatively stable approx 4 months ago.
  8. Agree with argh on this one, a good dawn simulator could really help, alongside things like leaving curtains open and setting loud alarms away from your bed. Unfortunately even on 100 mg my mind was so slow that everything felt in slow motion and I felt incredibly stupid (like forgetting words and peoples names I learnt seconds before)... I have tried raising dose up to 100 several times over the years but always couldn't tolerate it. So am back down on 75 mg which I know is pretty sub-therapeutic, and am about a month in taking vortioxetine alongside it which is having a clear antidepressant effect but I also feel verging on paranoia, like a strange edgyness to everything and everything feeling very strange (hard to explain but more then just pure anxiety). Trying to give it a chance but already had to lower to a low dose 5mg to get rid of worse paranoia and rushy almost dysphoric hypomanic style symtoms. The issue is the antidepressant effect of the vortioxetine is clearly helping (like a light switch on even if I didn't notice I was profoundly depressed before) but seems to be putting me in a kind of odd slightly paranoid state. Not sure what the best step forward is... My other issue (which is almost as important) as mentioned is intense physical pain, mainly focused on neck, shoulders and pressure behind the eye alongside a big spot in my right vision. It is persistent although varies in intensity and started out of the blue 4 months ago and has been extremely debilitating since. I'm trying out figure out what is going on with that as I have no idea what could be causing it (MRI clear)... Based on past experience treating anxiety/depression related things all of these things are rather new and distressing symptoms, which nobody can quite put their finger on... esp. the headache stuff. What is strange is they started precisely as the weather changed (warm suddenly) this spring, and accompanied a mood shift to a kind of agitated/irritable state, and haven't lifted since. They were so severe that I was bedbound for months in pain. The only thing that really seems to take the edge off is clonazepam, which I'm not really keen to increase as I am already dependant on 1mg daily.
  9. New member here. My dx have been GAD and Panic disorder with what my Pdoc calls a "light mood disorder". More importantly my GAD and Panic Disorder started alongside depersonalisation and derealisation (dissociation) & depression approximately 10 years ago following a lengthy periods of ocassional drug use (primarily Cannabis but also MDMA and Salvia several times). I have a suspicion that this light mood disorder is BPII as my father is BPII (has had several psychotic episodes but is primarily depressive/anxious/agitated) and retrospectively, attempts to treat the GAD/Panic/Anxiety/Depression with antidepressants (Fluoxetine - successful in certain ways) resulted in what I see as a state of overconfidence, lack of inhibition and a persistence of a certain kind of agitation despite relief from depression, Panic Attacks and some from anxiety (DP/DR stayed present). Personally my main alarming symptoms have always been the dissociative DP/DR and anxiety symptoms, and after withdrawing from fluoxetine many years ago a new Pdoc suggested Lamotrigine due to my comments on potential mood issues with antidepressants and persistence of dissociation. Only ever tolerated 50 mg lamotrigine, higher doses resulted in a feeling of extreme slowing down and feeling stupid, but this still pulled me out of a deep depression, helped anxiety to quite a significant extent and alleviated much of the depersonalisation symptoms until a relapse 2 years later which ended in hospitalisation. These were periods of deep depression but also agitation and severe anxiety and unbelievable DP/DR. After failing to titrate up again with lamictal, started Mirtazapine 15 mg and clonazepam .25 twice daily which lifted me out, with most relief from dissociative symptoms. Found howhever that during summer months (more so retrospectively) I would get quite hyper (racing thoughts, risk taking, elated, pressured speach), especially before I had taken my evening dose of clonazepam (and still felt somewhat irritable and agitated depressed during winter months). In other words I feel like hypomania was somewhat kept under wraps by the clonazepam. Due to these concerns and being stable, stopped Mirtazapine, and have been stable for two years until now, despite having a gradual increase in anxiety, DP/DR and depressive symptoms. Raised clonazepam dose to .5 twice daily a year ago which helped, yet had severe complications (preemting people telling me I was very stupid here) as I started occasionally binge drinking and regularly drinking casual amounts. This lead to strange blinding headaches (excrutiating), hangovers lasting days and worsening of all initial symptoms last summer. Somehow managed to stay afloat most of the year, but depression DP/DR and anxiety gradually worsened to the point where I was just apathetic and largely unaware of how depressed I was (still mildly functional). Then, out of the blue started having severe migraine like headaches, primarily ocular and often without pain (like an aura) alongside pain all through right side of face. This occured as the weather shifted suddenly to very sunny this spring. Alongside these strange headache, aura symptoms I became irritable, anxious and kind of all over the place. Attempted titrating up with lamotrigine first, got to 100 but same side effects returned, have now gone back to 75. Decided that relief from depressive symptoms I noticed from lamotrigine were significant enough to feel like waking up, but that I definitely was still mentally dull and anhedonic, as well as having lots of weird pains, headache/aura phenomena and severe DP/DR. Due to previous issues with SSRI's (sexual/emotional numbness) Pdoc suggested vortioxetine which I know is somewhat of an SSRI but seemed promising for cognitive symptoms... Started Vortioxetine 10mg, around 8 days in started feeling agitated and very fearful (veering on paranoia) with a odd feeling of warmth rising to my head and a feeling that I was on the edge of something very weird, feeling quite racey and strange... Pdoc suggested lowering dose to 5 mg and waiting, which has largely stopped these particularly severe symptoms... End of long story currently on lamictal 75 mg, vortioxetine 5mg and clonazepam .5 twice daily. Feel anxious, slightly agitated at times, am agorophobic and feel extremely sensitive to all stimuli. DP/DR is severe and while vortioxetine (4 weeks in now) seems to be having mood lifting effects I am still having strange pains around head and neck and ocular pressure and large black splodge in my right eye vision. Trying to seperate or clarify symptoms as there is a lot going on here... My concern is partially that I may be undiagnosed BP2 and that current regimen is just keeping some of the agitation slightly under raps but that I may have problems in the longer term... My concern is that the headache and general head pain symptoms may have been caused by some form of benodiazapene withdrawal caused by my use of alcohol along side it. Howhever, it definitely feels like the clonazepam cuts alot of the agitation/weirdness/raciness out, and it has been very helpful for symptoms of DP/DR and Pdoc is suggesting doubling dose to 2mg daily. Thoughts on this predicament? Even looking back at this message it seems quite racey to me, although not manic... Definitely tick the boxes on hypomania though...
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