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mika

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About mika

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    Take what you like and leave the rest.

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    Woman
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    Northeast Coast
  1. Well well well. this is the first time i have signed on in months because i heard of this ridiculous thread through a friend. Pot is not harmless. No substance, legal or not, is harmless. For those of you who smoke every now and then, good for you. those of you who have been lucky for pot to be harmless, good for you. i applaud you for your ignorance to the negative aspects and outcomes. Coming from a life full of substance abuse of every kind, I know all of it is bad. Those of you who say no, are in denial. First of all, we are talking about a teenager, where it is obviously not a good idea no matter how you put it. I know you can't stop them most of the time because we all were a teen once and know by experience. But I do know it is wrong. It causes us to do stupid things. and causes us to search for more highs leading to harder drugs. Then of course sometimes it gets mixed with alcohol. People steal to get money. It is illegal and you never know what could happen and then get caught with it. I started smoking pot in high school because I thought it was cool. But in actuality it was an escape from life. All substances are escape from life. No matter if it makes you feel "good" or not. My brother started with pot, he used to steal my things in order to buy it. My brother was high when he put a shaken up and open can of coke in a mail box at the age of 12 and got arrested for a federal offense and went on probation. He started doing other drugs. Every one out there,. He still smokes to the point that he smokes 5-7 times a day, even at work. He will never ever be able to go a day in his life without pot and he spends about 200 a week on it. Expensive habit. I used to think, hey smoking pot is alright. better than drinking. My parents condoned pot because it was "better than drinking". But then people say they can drive and smoke pot and it is better than driving drunk. yes it is but how do we know how many accidents are cause by being high? We don't. I know I have been in one while high and I had a bag under my seat. Now I look back and I can say that smoking is not okay UNLESS you do it every once in a while, in a safe place with good people and no other drugs. Plus, you never know what is in the weed you smoke. I, personally, do not smoke anymore. Last time I smoked, there was a very bad experience. I smoked with three people. One woman who has DID and another girl. The woman who had DID switched hardcore the entire night and it was scaring her and us. It was so obvious and I was afraid to leave her because I knew one of her parts would make her self harm. But eventually we had to leave. Drove home high and not ok to drive. And I had the pot in the car. When we got to my apt. We smoke again. We were watching a movie in a SAFE place. Then, all of the sudden, my friend started twitching. She fell into a full on grand mal seizure. I was high but managed to hold her and at the same time call 911 from my iphone which is very difficult with one hand and told the police that my friend was having a siezure and we smoked. I ran around and put my bong under my sink and hid the weed. The apt was filled with smoke. The cops, EMT and a detective filled up my small apt. My friend and I were taken in a ambulance to the hospital. On the way there my friend was going in and out of seizures and yelling for me but i couldnt help her. We got to the hospital and she had seizures for an hour. I had to help the nurses hold her down. I thought she was gonna die. She had been in a coma before in a car accident so i was afraid she was going to relapse to a coma or die. I was praying and wishing that we never smoked pot. She was rushed to Beth Israel in Boston. And finally came out of it okay. But I felt bad because it was my weed, my apt. I wasnt charged with anything. I risked my mental health that night as well. I have epilepsy and it was traumatizing. I cried for 3 days. Now that is an example of smoking gone bad. You never know what could happen and I will never smoke again. They say, "it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt". It is true and this was my epiphany. For those of you saying that BPladybug should not make a big deal of this girl smoking pot, that is ridiculous. First of all, it is her house and things like my experience happens. It is illegal and she could get into trouble. She is in the care of BP and her husband. That means advising her to do the right thing. I think she should focus on respecting the fact that she is in her house. That they worry for her a care about her. The prefrontal cortex thing won't work. But maybe the fact that respect is important in life. It is a tough situation. But for all of you who said smoking pot is okay for a teen. That is dumb. In high school, I only drank on the weekends. When i started smoking, i smoked before school or after...did no school work and didnt care about life. and those people who i know who only drank and didnt smoke, still did well in school. Those who smoked pot ruined their school career and lost respect from many people and often these kids chased their high and went on to ecstacy or shrooms or whatever. Teens def shouldnt smoke. Adults should only smoke in good circumstances, but even then things could happen like my experience. Those with mental health problems need to take it easy from it too. Especially those with any trauma. Paranoia is a huge issue in this case. Like I said, drugs are and escape from life. Pot most definitely is. Take it easy people. I have learned my lesson. I spoke my opinion. BP ladybug was looking for advice not for an explanation onto why pot is okay for a teen. God! Why are the people on this website looking for heated debates all the time. Is it because we need to take our meds? Or is it because we are just plain assholes. Look at yourselves. Read what you write. As we say you dont want to have to walk on eggshells but there is a difference in being cooperative and being dicks about everything. Take it or leave it...you know it is true. you just like to defend yourselves. And people who agree with the assholes only do it on here so they dont get put down by the assholes. and you know who you are. have a good life people. Be nice or say nothing at all.
  2. I am in group therapy for just women with trauma background. Group therapy has worked wonders for me. There are only 5 other women besides me (no men). I like it a lot and it is good to get feedback from people who have experienced adversity and living their everyday lives with ptsd and trauma disorders.
  3. i have been doing them all week at a program. i refuse to do dbt at home. the only thing i bring home is my diary card. the skills i know by heart. it's just about being "willing". i say "fuck that" most of the times. today i am very "willful".
  4. that is how i felt. except it wasnt my animals (although i still love them to death), it was how my suicide would affect my little cousin. if i can ever help my mental illness from taking a turn for the very worst, i only do it for her. otherwise, i would have been committed to the state hospital. if it wasnt for her, i wouldnt have cared to get out of the hospital so much. i didnt want to be a bad influence on her. i know someday she will understand my illness more. right now she just thinks i am fucked up because my parents suck. plain and simple. this is true. She still looks up to me for being strong. And I do not ever want that to change by her seeing someone give up. it would affect her so much. i could care less about most of rest of my family members.
  5. I do not mean to a acquisitory; I am trying to understand. After so many examples of what happens when you play with your meds why do you continue ? nf i dont know. my mind is a little wacky and i go through this stage every once in a while. like a denial thing maybe. i have been on meds since i was 13 (seizure meds mostly until my 20s). have had some crazy side effects along they way. sometimes i dont think its fair that some people dont have to be on meds. i want to be like them. so i try. it works for a couple of days and then i feel crappy. i dont understand why all of the sudden i cant go without an antipsychotic! honestly, i think the main reason is that sometimes i dont care if i am stable or not stable anymore...so i just go off them as if to test myself. like i go off of it to see what happens. then i get all crazy. its like i like to test the craziness, to see if I have gotten better. and then, like this week, become frustrated because i have further proven that i may be crazy for life and my fucking parents made me this way. so now because of me testing my craziness last week and i was over medicating in bed all weekend, i have to go to a day program for two weeks. sort of as a tune-up or pick me up. so to speak. to get myself stable again. sucks. i hope i made some kind of sense.
  6. It isn't bad at all. They thought I had schizo but it ended up being severe form of PTSD. They have you fill in 300 fill in the bubble questions. For example, do you see things? Often, sometimes, very often, never, etc. Then he had me do an inkblot test. It was bot 4 hours. They have so many tests to get done in one day since these tests are in high demand so they blow through it. Plus I filled in those dots quickly. Be honest! Don't worry. It is in no way scary at all.
  7. I used to be for a good year. Now every once in a while I play doctor and screw with my meds. I am actually honest about it with my treatment team and the fact that I play around with my meds pisses them off. I am very weight conscious and I am afraid of over medication effects. The only meds I don't play with are my seizure meds because I have done that before and I had a near death seizure. Just recently I have been screwing around with a psych med and it has brought me nothing but self medicating with Ativan. But I restarted it and hopefully it kicks into gear soon because a couple of days ago I was ready to punch my hand through a window! I have done it twice before and I don't want to break my apartment windows. Last two tines it was my parents windows which I didn't care about but the stitches and scars aren't fun.
  8. They dont work and every time i have called no one answered. so i ended up calling the poison hotline because i thought i took too much ipecac. she thought i was crazy and said go to the ER. so basically, you should go to the ER
  9. cuutteee! mine our indoor cats unfortunately. i live on a kind of busy street.
  10. my 7 month old cat does that too. all of the sudden her vocal chords strengthened or something and she is using her voice at all times but mostly in the morning, aghhhh!
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