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About sanity4christmas

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  1. I don't know why she's making me see the doctor but i'm getting referred today. I guess there's nothing to be nervous about, I think it was them finding sometimes wrong with me..thanks for your replies
  2. mainly because I don't want to live with her. I planned to get a job this summer but I just got progressively depressed and decided I couldn't stand living with her and wanted to spend the summer with my dad. I tried to give her a hug when she came in(she's intoxicated) and she was like 'you don't love me', so why am I being forced to go to a psychiatrst. She said to me that I shouldn't want to see my dad because I haven't seen or talked to him in months.. I've been to one before and they put me on meds,my mom lied to them and told them that if I moved back in with her she would get me into a better school,I go to the same school I left from now.. Her husband is also abusive, I have to say something to him everytime I see him or else he'll yell, curse and fuss about it, making it obvious that I wouldn't want to say anything to him. So I don't understand why I'm being sent to a psychiatrist, I still want to try to make it to my dads for the summer and I guess going to the doctor could be helpful. Now I'm nervous about it.
  3. I get that feeling too. My mom has written a letter for me once, i'll see how it goes. it's fine, makes perfect sense.
  4. Have you ever not done a presentation. I view most of them as an untouchable area. I have one tmrw where in order to get the appropriate grade, I'll have to talk about Langston Hughes for 10 minutes and recite a poem by him. I feel completely ashamed by my anxiety. I moved to a different city and these types of things weren't as bad and then I wasn't losing as much hair either lol ;/. But I also tend to feel generally hated and hate myself as well, and hated a lot about where I was living, I had to live with my sister and stay in a small room with my niece, there were so many chores and conflicts. I really felt like I was living in a mad house. Now I am back here in New Orleans but I couldn't get into a good public school. it's not a good school and i'm the only white person in every class i have... i don't feel a great need at all to communicate with people unless I have to. sorry if I sound incoherent, but I was wondering what you thought about me skipping the project all together..
  5. Happy New Year everybody, disasters happening in Japan-facepalm. I love everyone

  6. Everytime I see you happy, I want to kill myself

  7. I'm posting this here. It was out of everything, then PTSD and neuropaths. OCD looked scary, intelligent. And depression made me think that i might catch depression. I just feel like writing. or thinking, i'm not sure what i'll say or what will be asked. now im digging myself a hole and comfortably drowning. i could print out the posts from these past months but there isnt an explanation for any of it, anything thats happening. I didnt know why in the first place. what are apptments like?
  8. well its winter and christmas is almost here

  9. if i could just start all over...

    1. nibblerd


      Why not just make a new start now?

    2. sanity4christmas
  10. I would like to have balogna with a penguin

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