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About DKnight

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    Any interest I can find is good enough.
  1. I think if you've had a doctor you've been with for a long time they can usually pick up on it. My general doctor, whom Ive seen more often, was the first to point out I had OCD and GAD.
  2. I have been and my mood is better after taking ativan again. Anxiety just causes so much chaos in the brain.
  3. I've had panic attacks from many of the drugs I've tried including lexapro, paxil, seroquel. But I think this is more of a personal problem than it is the drugs themselves. But I've heard other people have had panic issues on these drugs too. It doesn't get much worse than a panic attack.
  4. Dealing with holiday shopping crowds is enough to make "sane" people panicky or irritable. At best. True but when I was out in public I felt fine, when I returned to the comfort of my home, then I suddenly had the anxiety. Doesn't make sense to me.
  5. Well I have been feeling weird for months, but hypomania may be stretching it. Any how I had an issue today where I went out, felt great, got some christmas shopping done, and when I returned home I began to feel paniced. I don't understand why this happens or what the cause is. Is this evidence of a mood disorder or do you think I'm simply unhappy being at home and that triggers it? And for the bipolar folks seeing this, do you have panic attack or anxiety more during you hypomania/mania or more during depressions?
  6. This is likely, but may not necessarily be true. Even still, I'd relax. What's your doc's reasoning behind the BP dx? Just a combination of past symptoms and problems that alternate. OCD, Panic disorder, recurrent depression...I mostly have a lot of anxiety problems. I've had some times where I suspected I was maybe hypomanic, but manic I'm pretty sure I wasn't as it would be pretty obvious eh? In all seriousness, I might be mistaking a normal mood for hypomania because I was so depressed. Maybe I'm just worrying about it too much. In any case, do ADs throw people in mania/hypomanias that don't have bipolar?
  7. As you've probably noticed I tend to worry a lot and come here since this community is very helpful and knowledgeable on meds moreso than I've seen on other sites. I believe I've created a lot of misconceptions in my head about how SSRIs work and if anyone out there has the time, if they could explain in detail exactly what's going on when we take these drugs. Firstly, they definitely improve my depression and anxiety. In fact Effexor along with some ativan has saved me from commiting suicide. I guess my concern about them is how do we know when the drug is doing too much. I worry sometimes that the drugs may create mood swing or instability. I've created this unrealistic fear that if I do things that are normally stimulating w/o ADs, that the AD is going to send me through the roof and in turn cause me a depression later on. And as silly as that probably sounds to people it's just the tip of the iceberg for weird fears I have. And I manage to convince myself it's true. Yes, I actually have a phobia of depression now, but when i was close to suicide it was quite a horrifying experience for me. I felt like someone else was in my body. I worry that I may be undiagnosed bipolar with my core fear being of losing control of myself. Anyways, do ADs do that to people? Make them go through the roof emotionally then bring them down? Or is it better regulated in our brains than I tend to think. I'm concerned being on high dosage of Effexor especially if I am bipolar which my pdoc says is a possibility. So if anyone has link or even just knows please tell me as you'll give me peace of mind temporarily until I find something else to worry about. Thanks
  8. It's definitely an OCD symptom, as when I was diagnosed I had the same problem. But just because you have that doesn't mean OCD is a problem for you. I often wondered if it was a way to block out other annoying thoughts like a defense mechanism.
  9. I think when I'm feeling better and more stable I'm going to reduce the dosage, I think that can help.
  10. Ya it also seems after that amount of time I'll get real tired and lethargic with it. I also want to know if it's ok to have space in between dosages since I'm only taking twice a day. Is that going to cause me any trouble?
  11. I really don't know, but since I've started I've been feeling great, speeded up a little. I went christmas shopping today something I've been dreading but I was nailing it with ease.
  12. Seems like no matter what combos I try, nothing works until I add ativan into the mix. Taking .5mg twice a day. It's not even my anxiety that was really bad, but more of an agitated depression I had when not taking it. I guess I'm a little worried about long term depression getting worse, but what choice do I have? My anxiety and my depression is better when I take Ativan. My thoughts are also much more clear. How can I beat that? I'll report in after a few weeks on it to see what happens. One thing I've noticed is I feel like going out a lot less. I've also noticed trouble going to sleep since I restarted it, but feel a lot more excited about things. In any case, it seems like it makes me anxious at first, then over a few days I feel more like myself and in control. I guess I'm very conflicted about taking Ativan cause I hear such negativity about benzos more so than any other drug out there. Anyone else have trouble going without a benzo in the mix?
  13. Thanks, I think it must be the perceptual change that causes a bit of anxiety at first.
  14. interesting...I wonder if I'm just not taking enough of it. It's usually a blessing to me...but sometimes I've noticed when I first get on it my anxiety is a bit more shaky.
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