Search the Community

I hate how my anxiety makes me overthink everything. Here lately, my relationship especially. It intrudes into my head and it makes me wanna say, "who do you think you are, coming into my head, and making me feel these negative thoughts?!" Like, really, who!? That might sound strange, but it's truly how I feel. I hate feeling unsure of my relationship. It makes me feel ill. I've been trying to take my meds consistently lately, I missed the day I had counseling...which is odd because we talked about my inconsistency of taking my meds. We've been together a little over a year now, which is pretty new for me. Never had a relationship last that long. Maybe I'm scared I'll get hurt or something? But, I know I won't. A lot of it is the whole "what if he isn't good for me?" spiel. My parents aren't very fond of what he does for work, but he does his best to take care of us, and put up with my anxiety and other issues. All in all he's pretty great, but my brain makes me want to over analyze everything and I wish I could make it shut up. My mom said she thinks it's making me realize that my relationship isn't healthy or something to that effect. Does anyone else have issues like this with their relationships? I saw a blog post about it from a girl who also suffered from GAD and I cried. It explained everything I've felt for so long when it comes to relationships, or at least this one. I feel like I'm alone in these feelings, usually. I know these feelings aren't normal, and I don't like them

Hi. My name is Mark and I have been diagnosed with major depression, GAD, OCD, and ADHD. I am blessed to have a caring support system (including my parents with whom I live after 12 years of independence and my wonderful and understanding fiancee) and access to care. Unfortunately I still find myself struggling immensely and appreciate this opportunity to articulate my difficulties. I am constantly assaulted by panic and feelings of shame. I feel as if I am a burden and a disappointment to everyone I know. I view myself as a failure of my own creation and that it is too late to do anything substantive about it. I struggle to hope and doubt that I will ever be better. Consequently, I spend unproductive time pining after my past when things were better, when I was better and happier. I am embarrassed of who I am and where I am in my life and I feel incredibly bitter when I see my peers being successful and productive. That envy mutates into self-recrimination because I know I only have myself to blame. I fear being judged because I have so little self-worth and validate entirely via what others think of me/comparing myself to others and as a result I am paranoid even around my dearest loved ones. I cannot accomplish anything productive, have been unsuccessful in anything professional for eight years and am easily distracted. I am no sure if this is because I am lazy or because I have ADHD. I want to know why I can't make myself work hard like everyone else. I just want to be able to do something. I also suffer from OCD and had made great strides thanks to Luvox and cognitive therapies but I have relapsed significantly lately and I am very discouraged, stressed and exhausted as a result. Perhaps most importantly, I don't like myself. I believe myself to be a bad person. I am selfish, self-absorbed and arrogant. I am lazy. I am dishonest because I refuse to take responsibility for my own failings and I want people to like me/be impressed by me. Thank you for allowing me to unburden myself. Sometimes it helps just to write it down.

Hello everyone. I suppose the idea is to post about why I'm here, so I might as well get started. I had Epilepsy until I was about eleven years old. When that went away they figured out I had ADHD, but it was not deemed severe enough to warrant medication. I had trouble in school. I was sociable enough, but five years of homeschooling had left me almost completely devoid of knowledge of social norms. You can imagine how that went. I learned how to more keep my mouth shut, but school became increasingly difficult. Not because of the material. but I was so afraid of disapproval that school became a place of severe anxiety. Because of my ADHD, I had difficulty telling the passage of time, and so what I thought was a three minute trip to the water fountain or bathroom was in fact fifteen. I would put off assignments that made me nervous until the last minute, but then they were only more difficult to get through. I avoided my peers religiously, because I was so afraid of not being accepted. When I reached high school it got easier. I met more and more people with whom I could share a mutual understanding, as well as teachers who not only understood my shortcomings, but embraced my strengths, and encouraged me in them. By the time I reached my last two years I had begun to conquer my anxiety. Unfortunately, it was then that a recurring problem reared its ugly head once again. Someone please tell me if this is normal or not. I would just be sitting in a classroom, doing a fairly simple assignment or test, but if I was caught off-guard by something, even the smallest thing, it was like my senses went into overdrive. I could hear every single conversation going on in the room at once and my brain was trying to listen in on all of them but I couldn't make out a word. My eyes would try to focus in on everything and even the sensation of my clothes on my arms or legs drove me insane. I could not tune anything out. And when I tried to do things like listen to music, which helped block it all out, teachers wouldn't let me, and the inability to stop it only made it worse. These attacks faded a bit after i graduated, but this past fall I had a whole host of family issues, and my whole world fell out from under me. Now I have more trouble focusing than ever, and I need meds to drive but I cant take even the smallest dose because it aggravates my anxiety and affects my heart in a way it shouldn't, but I have to finish college applications and I just can't even start because of my anxiety and focus issues. I joined this site because even my mom, who by far understands best what is going on, does not realize exactly how crippling this is for me, and I need a place to talk about this because it just keeps getting worse.

Hey there. I just found this forum and thought it looked pretty cool. I have severe Social Phobia, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, some Obsessive-Compulsive tendencies, and God knows what else at this point. I'm 23. I've been doing this for a while. See you around. .

I've been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and binge-eating disorder, and I'm 99 percent sure I'm suffering from comorbid depression. I have been seeing a therapist on and off for the past few years, but I'm currently living and working in a very remote area, and my options are *extremely* limited (the best I can do is a marriage counselor and an LBGT therapist who specializes in addictions, and neither of them accept my insurance). I feel absolutely out of control and helpless. I have two months' worth of Wellbutrin that I've considered taking to help me with the depression, but it exacerbates my anxiety. I haven't been able to stabilize my binging, which has also been out of control. I keep trying to practice stress-relieving techniques and read self-help books, but it feels like things continue getting worse. I take Klonopin as needed, but it's not nearly as effective as Ativan was (my psychiatrist, who is now out of network and on the other side of the country, decided the Ativan was too strong). My psychiatrist also prescribed Paxil, which I have, but I'm too terrified to try it because of the potential weight gain (I had the pleasure of that on Lexapro). I'm also scared to start a medication when I no longer have access to a specialist. I'm gaining weight already because of the binging, which is severely stressing me out. Do any of you have advice for someone in my position who doesn't really have access to therapy? My insurance doesn't cover phone sessions, but I could really benefit from talking through my issues with someone. I'm beginning to wonder if just talking to anyone at all is better than what I'm dealing with.