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So, Per doctor's orders, I was taking extra Klonopin yesterday to deal with my anxiety. Needless to say I had about 4mg, which I normally handle without too much trouble. However, I made the mistake of going out to dinner with a friend. I had two beers with dinner and whammo, the next thing I know I'm getting cited for public intoxication and have a court date set for next Thursday (fun!). So, I know it's been said before, but let this be yet another cautionary tale... do not mix your benzos with alcohol.

I'm supposed to be starting a new job with the Ambulance Service monday, and I just had to fill in a bunch of forms about my health for health screening, and had to include the fact that I've been off sick twice for prolonged amount time before due to my MI. Can they terminate my offer of employment because of this? I just said it was down to stress at work and home. Will they scrutinize me?? Plus, I quit the job before last because I was signed off sick because I was getting bullied by colleagues but then I have had to put the company as a reference because I had to put 5 years worth of employment references. If this comes up, will they ask me about it, or will they just terminate my employment?? I'm freaking out so much, my anxiety is fucking my life right now I want this job so much so I'm so worried about it!!!!!

Hi there. I am a clinical social worker by training but unemployed at present due to recent work situation in which I was the whistleblower (on client abuse by a supervisor, which was in turn covered up). The incidents, the whistleblowing itself, and the backlash it created triggered my PTSD so severely, that I had to quit (without proper notice) for my own sanity and self-preservation. (You can read that thread here.) I did the "right" thing by my clients by reporting the behavior, and the "right" thing for myself by protecting my mental health and quitting. However, it feels like the WRONG thing because a.) he got away with it, b.) I am not allowed to tell the truth, c.) my self-esteem and mental health has suffered in other ways due to this, and d.) I do believe this has ruined my career and my job prospects. I desperately need money (literally living on credit cards and paying the minimums with withdrawals from my Roth IRA, on food stamps, no family support) and cannot wait any longer for OVR (office of voc rehab) to finish their bureaucratic process and fund their services for me. I am capable of doing some kind of social work positions (especially if I know it is a stop-gap while I prepare to go back to school), in certain settings that have no risk of contact with this former agency, so I have been applying for those on a case-by-case basis. I have just recently decided to go ahead and start applying for administrative assistant/ receptionist type jobs (which is what my OVR service plan states will be my "goal" or targeted job-type.) Thus far, I have been leaving the "whistleblown" job off my resume and applications. I was only there for 9 weeks, so it's not like it's creating such a huge additional gap on my resume. What's the difference between being unemployed since July or unemployed since May? Either way, I have to explain the employment gap. However, I'm not sure if it's legal to do that on a job application (resumes are considering marketing tools, can leave off stuff, but employment apps are legal documents.) Reasons for leaving it off: -I cannot discuss that job without getting upset -I cannot discuss why I left that job because you aren't supposed to bad mouth former employers in interviews, and anything else less than the truth makes me like a total flake (i.e. I can't say I left for a better job) -I fear retaliation from the past employer when they are called for employment verification. The director got to "punish" the other whistleblower by forcing him to write an apology letter to the abuser to prevent himself from getting fired, but he never got to "punish" me. He can "punish" me now by saying whatever he wants about me, and I wouldn't put it past him. It's such a small place that there is no HR person or HR department-- his secretary handles HR matters. -No one wants to hire a whisteblower, a "rumor starter," or an "unstable person." Even if I don't mention whistleblowing, or anything like that, the past employer could mention it-- that I "started a terrible rumor about a respected employee and left abruptly without notice." -If I did mention, or even suggest, that I left because of concern about unethical behavior (or anything along those lines.... without mentioning whistleblowing), I'm afraid it could get back to the past employer and I could be sued for slander. (This is a bigger fear with a social work job, especially within my niche, than an admin job because people know people who know people in the field. I live in a big city, but the SW/treatment community is fairly small.) Reasons for putting it on: -I'm afraid that someone will somehow find out about it and that I omitted it from my application, and I'll get fired. -That is my main reason, but secondary to that is guilt/shame about lying (which is not because I feel it is inherently morally wrong to omit this information in this circumstance, but because 1. my mother, due to her Christian values, is trying to make me feel bad about it, and 2. I fear getting caught. Note: I actually feel guilty and ashamed going with either option because being "punished" for being the whistleblower, whether through me sticking around to "get what was coming to me" like my coworker did, through it being difficult to find a job after the fact, or through retaliation and job-search sabotage after the fact-- it makes you feel like you did something wrong even though you know you did what you were ethically bound to do by your profession's code of ethics (and possibly even legally bound to do by virtue of your licensure.) Guys, I know I don't post on here very much. I'm not sure if you even remember my original post on the topic. But, I am really really struggling with what to do on this. Disclose the job? Or pretend it never happened? Some thoughts, opinions, input, words of encouragement, etc would be greatly welcome. Thanks!