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Showing results for tags 'Triggering'.
I've been battling with that idea for at least two weeks and it's just growing. I don't know why. For the first time it's not just about a release of pain in a series of lines on a leg or arm...the other week I grabbed the blade and slashed on my arm because I was angry/upset/extremely hurt. There was no method to it. I just did it and felt better. I've never heard of people like us cutting their face. I feel like my SI has taken on a new...personality (as if it exists outside of me). It used to rarely happen, and only years ago. Since trying it again a month ago, it's been a constant in my head. I've done it about 4 times now. Has anyone heard of this or seen it? I haven't. I've seen a lot of cutters and not one with a slash across their cheek. I currently hide my scars when I can, so it's not like I want questions. That's what's been keeping me back, but not sure how long that will last. And I'm worried about wrinkles and acne and wearing nice eyeliner, so I sort of pride my face. Yet... Anyway, I hope I followed forum rules for this one. No shrink at the moment. My parents stopped paying for mine, so i can only afford him for med management. He used to be my psychotherapist as well.
recently I got my first "official" tdoc (by official I mean an actual psychotherapist instead of just a school one) and at our last meeting he suggested that I should undergo a 4 hour psychoevaluation with him to fully understand what's wrong with me. in that evaluation I have to talk about everything I've gone through and I don't want to hold anything back as I've done that far too many times in the past he gave me forms outlining the procedure, costs, etc. and I'm fine with that. I gave the form to my mom and she said that what I say about myself may get me institutionalized. as Iive in Ontario, Canada, they have a right to involuntarily institutionalize you for 72 hours if it is believed you are a threat to yourself or other (its under the mental health act I think, I think Florida has something similar) the specific "threat to yourself" has to do with self injury and suicidal tendencies. i do self harm fairly regularly and have been for the past few months. i also have near-constant suicidal thoughts and i think about killing myself every day. my mother is not aware of this, nor is my tdoc as we've only had 2 meetings thus far and those meetings were focused on me introducing myself and my problems and discussing the possibility of an ADHD diagnosis. so neither suicide nor self harm was brought up either times. my mom said she doesn't know if i have issues with harming myself (as i've never told her) but she says that the things I say may get me institutionalized. it's kind of hard to explain what i'm asking here but in summary i'm wondering if i would be "at enough risk" to have myself involuntarily institutionalized for my self-harming and suicidal tendencies. I'm currently in university so I know that if I get taken in, I'll be missing school. which is the least of my concerns at this point. has anyone else gone through something like this? being involuntarily institutionalized because you're at risk for injuring yourself.
May be Triggering for some - not not explicit. Hi All, I've been cutting since I was 12, was diagnosed with Bipolar II when I was 15; which seems to explain why - I've never really figured it out myself. I've had long periods of recovery, and I really thought I had it cracked this time. I was wrong. Last night I relapsed. I'm going to keep working on getting better, and not let this get me down or put me off finding healthier solutions, the usual spiel, but in the meantime I have to deal with the fallout, and I think I need some support with that. My family knows about my history with SI, and how I've been good for a while - but we don't tend to talk about it much, it's an uncomfortable subject after all. Since I'm home from uni and staying with them right now, I'm struggling with whether or not to come clean. I didn't want to upset them, and am fairly sure this is not going to be indicative of a serious relapse, so I wasn't going to mention anything. Then my aunt invited us to go swimming with herself and my cousins - worst luck! Fairly sure I could lie my way out of it, which would be less stressful option for all; but also sets a precedence I've been trying to avoid. On the other hand, piling familial stress on top of my current abundance of crazy seems like a recipe for disaster. Any thoughts? Lillian.