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Found 12 results

  1. Hi. I lost the remaining contact with the persons I knew some years ago because in a crisis I wrote them some stuff that was bottled inside. Does anyone else lost all their friends because of your illness or since your illness, with a reason or without reason? And what do you do now?
  2. My fingers are aching just writing this. A little voice in my head is screaming at me and telling me how stupid I am and how worthless this is. It's telling me "nothing can help! NO one is going to listen to you anyway, let alone understand you." Every time I try talk to someone is person they just put me down and tell me "It's just a phase" or "don't worry, you are still developing" Like WTF do they mean?!?! You can't tell me how I feel! No one will ever know exactly how I feel! I know that what I'm feeling my friends don't feel. They aren't screaming inside, or have to pretend to be happy ju
  3. Are there any reclusives here ? I have been a quasi recluse for 17 years and a complete recluse for 10 I just very recently discovered forum boards and discussion groups , per my Doctors orders , he says I need to socialize , but its a bit overwhelming to me , seeing and comunicating with people . I am not sure if it healthy for me , I get my feelings hurt sometimes , because I am so far behind in everything it seems , How does one go about socializing on social media , what are some tips ? And if your a recluse I would like to know I am not all alone .
  4. well my boyfriend and I have been together a year this July. but lately all we have been doing is fighting, and not nice fights either. a lot of shouting. I feel as if we are drifting apart, im afraid and feeling a little helpless, I love him to bits. he is everything to me. I love him, but he gets jealous if I talk to someone I have known and grew up with because my friend in a guy, and cos they are speaking to me and not him. not sure what to do to be honest? are we drifting apart
  5. Hi I have been battling with self harm since high school, after being bullied constantly, about the way I looked. Alright I wasn't the prettiest girl in the world, and still isn't, but the bullies didn't care. I lost count of the amount of different names I was called, being pushed down stairs on the way to lessons, have doors shut in my face etc. I found the only way out was to self harm. The only peace I found was when I self harmed. I never told anyone, so I suffered in silence for a very long time, wearing long sleeves even in summer. I didn't want anyone to know. As the yea
  6. I had about a 2 month period when I thought we had figured out my meds and was feeling rather "normal" Well now i been crashing, and it got worse about 4 days ago... If anyone has read any of my previous post one of my biggest things that comes with my crashes is wanting to leave my husband. Again he is an AMAZING person, loving, supportive, loyal. I dont desire a divorce (though i often think that would be the fairest thing for him even though I know he doesnt want it either) I HATE MYSELF for these thoughts. I HATE MYSELF SO BAD. Id gladly deal with most anything else then wanting to le
  7. I get it I really do, im not normal and I really dont care to be. I cant remember a time in my life that pain wasint a form of medication I used to treat myself. Its been a nightmare when it comes to relationships and ive tried hard i really have. It seems that every time i get something good in my life its inevitable for it to be destroyed and i do mean destroyed. Ive been to doctors ive been in and out patient and everything remains the same. I cant lie to myself even though i lie to everyone eles when i say that im fine when im really not. I think about things that i cant share with anyone
  8. I have been quite depressed lately over loosing friends and even family. While my relationship with my fiance seems to have been saved (he has been going to therapy, taking meds, been much happier, sweeter, supportive, and at least trying very hard to be understanding of my emotional self which makes me very happy), all my other relationships seem to be falling into shambles. I will start off with my dad. We were very close until I became a very troubled teenager. He tried to gain custody, but I refused to go due to the emotional stress it was causing. An ex-wife he always sided with to g
  9. I'm not 100% sure this is the best place to vent out my feelings, but I've joined anyway. I'm a person with a lot of problems. I have anxiety, an eating disorder, and severe depression. I often feel lonely and suicidal even. I'm not gonna get into that right now though. I've been on one other forum before, though I stopped, not sure why. Now I'm rejoicing because problems have popped up for me, I feel like I'm at a breaking point, and I do know there are so many people out there struggling, and way more than me. Some of you have bipolar, schizophrenia, etc. I sympathize with you indeed, I'm no
  10. Tonight I had an argument with a guy I'm dating on the phone. It was tough, but I was excited because I managed to be skillful.. Not blow up at him, and communicate my real underlying feelings. Fast forward a few hours, I come to find out through a mutual acquaintance that he has told numerous people we both know how "insane" and unstable and generally psychotic I am. I fully admit, i am not easy to be with. I'm textbook BPD and he has hung in there with me through some big emotional blow ups. He, however is extremely emotionally repressed, doesn't communicate well.. And it's a challenge.
  11. I have been stumbling along trying so hard to keep anyone from noticing how hard I struggle. I am scared of people around me knowing what is actually going on for me. I am getting really tired of being so alone, I know the next logical step is to see a professional. Until I work up the courage I would appreciate meeting other people that have come out of hiding.
  12. I only have two friends, and they mostly spend time with me because they know all about my mental health issues and feel bad for me. Other people just judge me all the time. Most won't even talk to me really. I'm bad at social stuff. I can't even talk about normal stuff people talk about because I don't have anything to say. When they talk about parties and friends and relationships, what am I supposed to talk about? I don't go to any parties. And I never had a relationship. I hate being at the bottom of the social hierarchy. No one takes me seriously. I hate being fat and ugly and bein
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