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  1. Even when my mood is stable (and I don't really feel depressed), I have excessive boredom... or is it laziness or Apathy? Especially since the confinement, nothing is open, nowhere to go, nowhere nice to even walk around to distract myself. I'm unemployed. It's been much worse. I can manage to do basic things on good days (like shower, exercise, go outside for a walk, cook, eat healthy)....but this literally is all I can do.... I try to initiate something enjoyable (like reading a book, or doing something creative, listen to music) and I cannot engage. I have extreme resistance, cannot su
  2. My mood has been absolutely deplorable for the past month or so. I honestly don't know how to begin to describe how bad it is. I have a lot of the "negative" symptoms, a profound deficit of positive affect. Nothing in life gives me pleasure, suicidal thoughts begin to surface, and I sometimes descend further into psychotic depression. These are my depressive episodes. I don't know how else to paint the picture more thoroughly because I never know what to say, and it really bothers me when I'm like that when I'm around my boyfriend. I want to talk, but I can never think of anything to say, so I
  3. My brief period (6 months) on Sertraline has been that it sapped my creativity and basically made me not want to do anything, not feel anything. I just sit at the computer and watch videos and occasionally walk around, or eat, or go to the bathroom. I just don't have any drive to really do very much of anything, except what is needed for continued survival. I don’t even want to watch movies and series! Is that normal?
  4. Hello Everyone in the community, I have been a member for a few months in this website but I finally decided to write an introduction topic of what I am going through right now. I have spoken to a few of the members in the chat room and have been able to get some advice from them. My story goes as follows: I was diagnosed with drug induced delusions in January 2014. The psychiatrist I visited then prescribed me 15 mg of Zyprexa which I took for about 4 months. Then I visited another psychiatrist because I moved and he changed my meds from Zyprexa to Invega 6 mg. I was on Invega for about
  5. Hello Comrades, I've been taking Sertraline (50mg daily) for 9 months now. Reason for taking Sertraline: Depression & SAD. Maybe some GAD. So Sertraline treats my baseline anxiety quite well, also got rid of digestion problems, but I am struggling with side effects: Motor restlessness, agitation. I've always been quite "hyperactive", but Sertraline has worsened it by a good amount. I cannot sit still, I feel I have to walk, to pace. I move my fingers and toes to "release" some of the energy. Also lots of fidgeting, rocking back and forth. I have the urge to crawl out of m
  6. I had a psychotic episode in september and have been on risperidone since. Since my prolactin levels were getting too high, I'm now switching to abilify. I'm afraid that the risperidone has made me anhedonic. My psychiatrist is tapering the risperidone down and increasing my abilify. Is there anyone out there who has recovered from this anhedonia after they came off the risperidone and if so how long did it take?
  7. Hey all, I have been experiencing some anhedonia lately and just not experiencing feelings much at all in general. I feel like I don't want to talk to as many people or interact like I usually would. There's is't much pleasure in doing the things I usually do, and simple things like showering or going downstairs to get my mail are difficult to get the motivation to do it. I don't think I am depressed because I'm not feeling sad or unhappy, I am more just suffering from lack of ability to derive pleasure from things that once gave me pleasure and a general lack of emotions. I notice
  8. So I got anhedonia from risperdal which i was put on after a drug induced psychosis and am currently on wellbutrin(which is not working. I've been on it for about a month). I keep reading everywhere that ssri's have given people anhedonia/made it worse. My psychiatrist may prescribe this for me next week and take me off of wellbutrin and I'm scared. Should I just opt not to take it?
  9. So I've had 2 psychotic episodes(one in september and one in november) which left me with what my psychiatrist told me is depression even though the only symptom I've felt is anhedonia. I've just been prescribed Wellbutrin 4 days ago and am wondering if any of you had success stories with wellbutrin for anhedonia.
  10. I would be very interested in reading some (if any) stories from people who successfully "defeated" anhedonia or complete absence ofemotions. How did you go about it? Did you take something? Found a magic potion? Etc...
  11. I would be very interested in reading some (if any) stories from people who successfully "defeated" anhedonia or complete absence ofemotions. How did you go about it? Did you take something? Found a magic potion? Etc...
  12. This thread is dedicated to the specific symptom "Anhedonia" which is the medical term for loss of interest and pleasure, as well as numbness and apathy which go hand-in-hand with this symptom. I'd like to hear everyone's experience with anhedonia, numbness and/or apathy so we can gather information and try our best to find a solution. Please do share your experiences if you have some. First off, i'd like to explain my experience with it and what i've found out about it through research. I was just diagnosed as Bipolar II recently. I have been depressed for a long time, but not anymore. I
  13. I have anhedonia which is a chronic 24/7 absence of all my good moods. It is the result of a dysregulated HPA axis (stress response) that cannot calm down taht is always perpetuating 24/7. I have also recently gotten a urinary tract infection and that has made matters much worse. I now notice that I am having symptoms of hypoxia as well as anemia which are mild at this point. I am afraid that this is going to kill me. Is it really going to kill me? The whole inflammation process during infection also further dysregulates the HPA axis which means my symptoms of hypoxia and anemia also
  14. Everyone must always be cool to me. In other words, I must always get a good vibe from them. If they show a bad attitude towards me and show scorn and/or detest towards me, then they die. I don't care who they are and I don't care what situation it is. Even if it is a situation that others would deem as very minor such as getting in an argument with someone. As long as they give off a loathsome bad vibe to me through their display of scorn, frown, and detest towards me, then they all die by my hands. The fact is, I do not put up with any problems. So not only must people always be cool
  15. I was wondering if Korean\Panax Ginseng did anything to negative symptoms in schizoaffective disorder, like lack of pleasure - anhedonia - and avolition. I don't have the will nor the pleasure to do anything and that irritates me. I can't pursue anything for any good length of time. This is very troublesome. I don't know if it's from the medication I take or not.
  16. I have had a drug induced psychosis and was brought to the psych ward where they gave me 4mg of Risperidone and I took it for 3 months I was not told about the dangers of this med or anything so I stupidly took it for 3 months and I later found out that it was way to high of a dose I should have known to stop taking it whenever I felt so sedated and weak and I couldn't ejaculate, it made me sleep 12 hours a day and I peed the bed because of risperidone but anyway I took it for 3 months and stopped taking it and now I am NOT the same AT ALL and I have been off it for 9 months !! I no lo
  17. I am a hedonist which means that feelings of pleasure are the only things that define my life as good (even though I still have full empathy and compassion towards my family and other innocent people as well). However, it is actually only my own feelings of pleasure that define my personal life as good and nothing else since I am only in my own mind and not in the minds of others and cannot feel their pleasure. Me somehow experiencing pleasure from witnessing someone else experiencing pleasure is not me experiencing their feelings of pleasure. It is all still my own personal feelings of ple
  18. I have lost all my feelings of pleasure due to anhedonia which is a negative symptom of schizophrenia and also due to depression. It really gets to me when people tell me that there are other good things I can live for in my life besides my pleasure because there aren't any. I am not selfish in saying this and I still have full respect and compassion towards others even when saying this. I have every reason to believe that my feelings of pleasure are the only things that can define my personal life as being good. I wish to talk this out with someone who is fully compassionate and respectfu
  20. I have developed severe chronic anhedonia as a result of depression. It has lasted for over 7 months, still hasn't gotten any better, and there are never any brief moments of pleasure. My feelings of pleasure (such as love, joy, motivation, etc.) are the most important things about me as a person. They are far more important than my attitude, actions, personality, etc. As a matter of fact, my attitude, actions, and personality do not matter at all without my pleasure and are neutral (neither good or bad). My good and bad value as a human being is solely based on the level of pleasure (goo
  21. Depression (including anhedonia which is an absence of pleasure) are, in a way, sort of like the flu. It comes and goes. You first get sick. But over time, the mind and body heal themselves and you are back to being completely well. This is because it is vital to get back to the state of your full normal well-being. Otherwise, your chances of survival (thriving in life) are slim. So it is vital that your mind and body restore its survival mechanisms. This would even include pleasure since pleasure is something vital for our thriving and survival in life. Far more people feel depressed having a
  22. I doubt anyone remembers me but I made some blog posts and forum posts a month or 2 ago about my snorting focalin and doing benzedrex inhalers along with other addictions and unsuccessful meds. Well, since then I've just stopped thinking of my mental disorders as concrete things and just consider myself bipolar NOS because it's easier. I got the whole motherload of schizoid adhd paranoid sometimes manic depressive disharmoniushellride. But after almost locking myself in to a rehab during the interview, they gave me a tour and it was just like the crisis unit, thorazine zombies and one flew ove
  23. i've just started latuda about a month ago. it does seem to be doing some positive stuff. i'm not thinking of dying, i'm not crying anymore, i can feel things in a sort of blunted way rather than at a ridiculous volume. i do stuff around the house without as much procrastination, and it doesn't seem like a herculean effort to get into the shower every day. for that matter, i actually care about getting into the shower, which is great. but i spend about half my day in the weirdest state. i feel like i have to do *something* all the time, and yet nothing is pleasing or holds my attentio
  24. Seems I will be starting therapy soon and this is something I want to work on. Has anyone experienced improvement in their anhedonia through therapy? What does that therapy involve?
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