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  1. Just wondering if anyone out there has had any experiences with the medication Rexulti (brexpiprazole)? My psychiatrist chose to give this a try (2mg) after evaluating and attempting to treat my persistent manic symptoms -- I would go days without sleeping and not feel tired, racing ideas and thoughts, increased in "goal-directed" activity like cleaning the kitchen for hours and sexual promiscuity, inflated self-esteem, inattention or inability to focus, pressured speech, rapid talking, and hyperactivity. Seroquel is super effective for stopping my mania but the negative cognitive effect and zombification I experienced were too much, and this was only at 50-100mg If you have tried Rexulti please share your experiences with it in terms of treating your symptoms of bipolar disorder, whether or not it worked for you, side effects you experiences, and the main symptoms that resulted in you trying this medication. So far it has been about a week on Rexulti 2mg, and I am beginning to notice a slight increased in motivation and better time-management, which really surprised me given my past experiences with AAPs. This could be due to other medication, as my dexedrine dose has increased from 40mg to 60mg, but I have been on this high of a dose in the past and not noticed the increased thought organization and motivation to complete tasks/assignments before the last minute. It hasn't directly induced sleep as Seroquel did, but I do notice I am getting on a better schedule. Also, if you have not tried Rexulti but have been on Abilify (aripiprazole), I would be happy to hear your experiences as well, given that the two are similar in structure and chemical composition (I acknowledge that despite this, the two can still have very different and distinct effects).
  2. So I just started Latuda and I am an avid user of alcohol and marijuana (its legal in my state) I currently take geodon, lamictal, and lithium but I just added latuda everything seemed like it was actually working great with Latuda but after I used "weed" and alcohol my brain is in bad shape and slowly getting better It really left my mind foggy and inattentative in the morning because of combining the marijuana and alcohol with it. at first it was going great but mixing those things with it really left my mind not all there moral of the story if you take other bipolar/schizophrenia meds alongside Latuda DO NOT do any marijuana as well it'll ruin your brain over time trust me. Other antipsychotics can cause this effect too i hope this helps those who are struggling with substance abuse alongside any of these meds because they can help you greatly but marijuana will fry with your brain with them overtime mixing them
  3. I've been on and off antipsychotics sporadically for the last 7 years since age 22 (since 2011). I'm extremely sensitive to them and have a very high response to every one I've been on. I've gained 145lbs from an increase in appetite and metabolic changes, have severe akathisia that is utterly insane and makes me want to cut my own legs off, I developed severe gynecomastia from Risperdal and Invega respectively (Won the Risperdal lawsuit, but no surgeon will touch me because of my weight), experience anxiety (The most on Abilify), fatigue, drowsiness, impotence (On Fanapt), anhedonia (From aggravated depression on Haldol), blurred vision (On Fanapt), lack of concentration, mild tardive dyskenesia (In combination with TMJ syndrome, I think it's permanent), dry eyes (Can't secrete my own tears), nasal congestion (aggravated, because I have it anyway without taking APs) , disorganized speech (Literally developed a speech impediment from a combination of Fanapt and Topamax), GI issues, etc I've experienced almost every common recorded side effect from this category / class of drugs. The lack of control over my weight and appearance and the akathisia are the worst (that's why they're listed first and reiterated). These drugs have destroyed the relatively abysmal life I had before I developed this illness and presently cut it down to absolutely nothing. I have no life. I spend the majority of my life either going to multiple doctor's appointments for my medical issues or otherwise eating uncontrollably, and pacing back and forth and smoking cigarettes occasionally. I browse the internet with my thoughts racing. I might try to watch a TV show or play video games or play bass guitar like I used to but I can barely hold concentration or focus long enough. I want this to end, I really want out. I want to experience a fraction of life again. I was previously diagnosed Bipolar 1 With Psychotic Features before my 2nd and most recent episode. As I said, I haven't taken APs consistently for 7 years. I've gone off of them twice for pretty significant periods of time before I relapsed. I usually last about 10 or 11 months (almost a year) without symptoms and perform consistently better in life in general with everything gradually going back in my life to when before I was 22. The side effects and depression usually disappear within a week. At 5 to 8 months I'm very stable, but in just under 11 months I start feeling like I'm on top of the world, become severely manic and delusional, hallucinate, experience an episode, and get into legal trouble. The 1st time around, I resisted arrest during a welfare check called in by my parents and went to the hospital and the 2nd time I successfully eluded the cops by motor vehicle on the highway and got caught hours later and went to county jail. I understand I could be facing harsh consequences but I've never been on a heavy mood-stabilizer before. All they do is overload me with APs. After the 1st episode I stopped taking psych meds completely because of how much I despised how I felt except for Zoloft and resisted almost all treatment. I avoid SSRIs now and will this time because I think it may have been responsible for raising my mood too much before the 2nd incident took place. The key to preventing future incidents for me, I believe, is to make the hallucinations and mania more tolerable to where I won't feel the need to act on them. The delusions are a joke, I can easily handle them. I'm currently taking Latuda 20mg and I'm requesting that my psychiatrist allow me to keep 2 or 3 bottles stored in my cabinet or 1 on me at all times in case any symptoms were to occur while taking Lithium. During the last episode, I was frantically searching for antipsychotics or any appropriate psych medication but didn't have them because I threw all of my former meds away after the first episode had taken place. This time I will have them to back me up and if it turns out that I need to suffer immeasurably on Latuda 20mg or another AP for the remainder of my life then so be it but I deserve a chance on a mood stabilizer simply because of what I've gone through and what I'm experiencing on APs. Has anyone ever tried Lithium as monotherapy for schizoaffective disorder or bipolar 1 with psychotic features? I hear it still has some side effects (would like to know what all of those are) but that it's immeasurably more tolerable than antipsychotics. I realize many people use it in combination with an antipsychotic but this is not in reference to that. Is there anything better than those two that's not an AP? This post is simply to inquire about anyone's thoughts or experiences about using Lithium or Lamictal as monotherapy for schizoaffective mania. A dosage and frequency recommendation would also be appreciated from those that have taken it, although I realize that I will ultimately need my psychiatrist to determine that. I found 1 study on this subject from the early to mid 1980's here: https://watermark.silverchair.com/10-1-30.pdf?token=AQECAHi208BE49Ooan9kkhW_Ercy7Dm3ZL_9Cf3qfKAc485ysgAAAcYwggHCBgkqhkiG9w0BBwagggGzMIIBrwIBADCCAagGCSqGSIb3DQEHATAeBglghkgBZQMEAS4wEQQMAypxqSBIPHx7kbXfAgEQgIIBeTskilYIIUxtfy4i-FH7a6BQ4SrsYxqZG44q7kWx1rVJdLbZ4PMxE33_FUje8rDj4FoUYJI27hYGzv-06pCL6xPDrbVg7n-g9QzqTwoPiRxgDv2VnqzwifudoudTuskAGEKItv5TfD1_V9opXCFF7vJXJln8ij8NeNkMLUpe_n-Xbp6TtkU7rXYdPCZ9dObhTfmQ4PEHkwKfcJcOVAjXzelMWD1EPzWPxCK5zu1l1d2w8ojnqH68mbvgaDuvBxyPTY-EEdADh9N0NIUPQCWHXZKWE2gEBsG_AbWS-bkPdgjxtXcn8Y_5KljQbU2Geb_ERYYWuWFMEk6CRs7FYte_16TOiCQVlahMabKxw0BdjlqvdGaPYZTKBoBWb9Poswigg8jbF1whmlo7WWRyCLCLdbKt4xkmZCU0qmv_j5FTFzeXsq05ptOFY10M3jpUft1xV75pMsPtVJ8U7d42OYqMksXhZyrA8B5k9XNhfJGS0XgmTTSLHNOdcTY2
  4. Hi everyone. I have bipolar l disorder with psychotic features, anxiety, ADHD and depression. Right now, I'm talking all of the medications below and I'm trying to figure out why I'm still dealing with depression. I also smoke cigarettes, which obviously aren't making my mental/physical health any better than what it could be without them. Right now, I take a combination of a mood stabilizer, an antipsychotic, 2 stimulants, a benzo and an antidepressant (Cymbalta 120mg). What I'm trying to figure out is if whether or not my med mix is causing all of my dismay or if my antidepressant is no longer effective, or whatever. I've also noticed over the years that I'm very depressive during the summertime, so that is something to take into consideration as far as having SAD and talking to my pdoc about it. The pdoc I see has a reputation for over-medicating his patients, but I didn't know this until I too started seeing him. I'm stuck with him for now until I can find someone who can make sense of my situation. I'm just so fed up with these almost 8 years of trying to find the right combination of meds or if I even need this much! My pdoc is clearly over-medicating me to some degree right now (which I am sure you can agree), but I just don't have the insight to tell the difference of what's causing my depression, what's meds work well with each other and which ones don't. What do you think? Do you think that my depression is a result of being on too many meds? The wrong meds? Did Cymbalta stop working? Can antidepressants stop working?Please provide me with your insight, experiences and knowledge! Thanks. PS. I go to work 5 days a week able to somewhat cope, then crash into depression over the weekends, then I start all over.
  5. Hey guys So I started Latuda about 8 weeks ago at 20 mg, (just the starting dose but wasnt able to get into see my doc when I was supposed to) I am definitely feeling some effects, most of them good, but I wanted to know if anyone has experienced or heard of the same? -Weight loss. I've always been about 100 lbs, super "skinny", always get asked if I eat blah blah blah. If you're a naturally skinny girl with "a fast metabolism" you understand... Now I've NEVER been under 100 pounds (even when I never eat) but now I have been consistently eating A LOT more and my weight is dropping quickly. I was 96 pounds about two weeks after starting Latuda and I'm now at 90. Need to ask my doc but anyone experience? -Insomnia. what I've noticed is that even if I get to bed really late, if it is before 5AM, I'll wake up at early 9/10. Usually, if I went to bed that late, I would sleep all day. I know, my sleep routine sucks. *I STARTED TAKING IT IN THE MORNING AND THIS HELPED 100% with sleep* I now sleep like a baby and am naturally tired by the time 10pm rolls around I actually like waking up at a decent time and starting my day, something I've never even thought was possible before this drug. - I am popping up all the time to get things, or move things, or do things for others in my house(like getting my boyfriends a drink from downstairs anytime he asked without whining about it first).. I think this is just me starting to feel better, but am open to different interpretations -On the whole, I am beginning to feel pretty good, but not that "I feel soooooo good," hypomania. But I do get really irritable for about 15 minutes a few times a day. If anyone can relate, knows if this is normal or if anyone thinks something is off, could you please give me your opinion?
  6. So l saw my pdoc today and he has decided to discontinue my lithium totally. This is due to the latest blood tests which shows I have grade 3 (out of 5) chronic kidney disease. He started me on Epilim Chrono (sodium valproate) which most people know as depakote. My starting dose is 400mg. I was on this several years ago with a lot of other medications so cannot recall side effects. I know that weight gain can be a problem. My pdoc also said that I may feel sedated on it. Any side effects I should be aware of?? Also, going off lithium is of great concern. I was on it for 13.5 years. I have been tapering off it and I know there is a real risk of me becoming manic. My pdoc will be seeing me more frequently to keep a good check on things and the community psychiatric nurse will be in close contact with me. For anyone who has had to taper off lithium...... Was it a rocky road?? For anyone switching from lithium to valproate..... How did it go? Boy do I HATE change!!!!!
  7. I'm stuck here in this place, my brain just won't shut down. It's like little firecrackers going off all over my brain. When I lay down and close my eyes it's like I see light that just forces me to open the lids and start working on my next project. I haven't been this way in a long while. Could my meds possibly be off? Med list is in my about me. Any opinions would be great. Thanks.
  8. I have fairly frequent episodes of dissasociation or derealization. I daily take mood stabilizers, antidepressant, and anti-anxiety meds. I have had many years of psychotherapy. My pdoc has been of limited help so far. Does anyone know of medical treatments for DD? This is really disrupting my life, personally and professionally. Any info is appreciated.
  9. hi guys! so a bit of background info; i've been taking lithium for just about a year now and am currently on 900mg a day. about a month ago, though, i kiiinda fell off the proverbial horse when it came to taking my meds regularly. unfortunately, when i smartened up and finally took them again, they decided to beat down on me with some nasty nausea- a side effect i mercifully managed to avoid my first time taking lithium. it generally comes on about half an hour after taking my pills, and lasts for an hour or so before gradually fading away. it's gross and unpleasant, to say the least, especially considering i take them at night and CANNOT get to sleep when i feel like i'm about to hurl. and unfortunately still, i'm too chicken to just ride it out and wait for the side effects to fade away, which of course results in me missing dose after dose and not winding up in the best headspace. so i was wondering: do you think splitting my dose up during the day-- as in taking 300mg in the morning, another 300 in the afternoon, and finally the remainder before bed (or something of the like) --would help quell the nausea?
  10. I've been told I appear to be going through a "mixed" episode, or dysphoric depression. Could be, could be. Anyway, I am having a lot of trouble controlling obsessive thoughts about what are probably insignificant things. Right now: I made a post on Facebook that a few people took offence to. It was fairly minor -- I expressed frustration that drugs were being used in a park near my house and that I kept encountering needles, broken crack pipes, and broken liquor bottles; I was then told I should find somewhere else to walk my dog because I don't know the circumstances of the people who do those drugs, and they have basically have a right to do whatever the fuck they want. Normally I wouldn't really care, because those individuals are the kind of people who try to find something offensive in everything, so that they can use the world as their soap box. So I was slammed and berated in the comments section, but others expressed support, and hey, that's social media, right? People have a right to express their opinions, no matter how condescending and self-righteous they are. I engaged in a logical debate, but eventually cut it off because it was just too much work and I was going to start making some "ad hominem" attacks that I'd rather avoid. One of them unfriended me, which seems like a huge over-reaction to just disagreeing with an opinion that matters so little in the grand scheme of things. Anyway, even though it's just a matter of opinion, I can't stop obsessing over what others said that I disagreed with, and keep checking the post even though I turned off notifications so that I wouldn't keep checking the post! I think this is just a symptom of dysphoric depression - I become fixated on something and just obsess and obsess and let it ruin two days, when I know logically that it's just not worth it. I consider them hyper-sensitive, but I get easily upset and hurt when someone disagrees with me. It's so fucking frustrating and I can't make it stop!!!!!! How do you deal with obsessive thoughts and the urge to tell everyone just exactly what you think of them? Mixed episodes are the worst. (And I'll also probably be checking here obsessively for responses... ugh!)
  11. not really an urgent question, i'm just wondering i find that when i self harm it happens a hell of a lot more when i'm in a mixed or manic state. this is super weird, but alongside the obvious notion of feeling totally invincible and being impulsive as shit, i think it comes from a weird urge to see blood? anyone else get this, even if it's not in the same grisly way i do?
  12. Hi, so I'm new to the board. My story is basically that I have suffered from anxiety disorders (and what was finally diagnosed as) Bipolar I Disorder for at least half my life. (I'm 30.) I have also struggled with anorexia nervosa since I was a teenager. While I still meet the diagnostic criteria for AN, it is nowhere close to being as severe as it was before the mood disorder (after a decade of trial and error with medication cocktails) was finally brought brought under control. I currently take Lamictal 200 mg, Seroquel XR 800 mg, and Wellbutrin XL 300, which, in combination, have made me the most functional I've ever been in my life What is NOT under control is my anxiety. I wake up every morning with an overwhelming sense of dread that subsides only a little as the day goes forward. (I have to measure my vitals in the morning for an unrelated illness and my pulse is over 100 from the second I open my eyes.) The most basic interactions with others make me jumpy and, even though I'm usually pretty articulate, I have problems with stuttering and word retrieval around new people (which, of course, makes me more anxious). I do not live an "objectively" stressful life. In fact, I should be LESS anxious than usual right now because my semester just ended. But, frankly, it's made no difference. My brain always finds SOMETHING to worry about. (Good grief...this has gotten so long. No one is going to read this...) Perhaps this is a bit naive, but the thought occurred to me yesterday that if I could just manage this anxiety as I do the mood disorder, I could live an almost normal life. The health professionals and even my family seemed to have accepted that I will live a marginal existence given the number of years I've already been ill; the sheer number of psych (for medication overhauls and ECT) and eating disorder hospitalizations; the fact that the only reason I'm really able to work is that I am the office manager at my fiance's office and he obviously allows me to have very flexible hours. (I've even found out by accident that my mother has started a trust fund for me in case I'm unable to support myself after she is gone. Obviously, this is exceptionally generous, but it also made me feel like she's given up on my ever being self-supporting.) But, frankly, I don't want to be complacent, and I don't the people around me to accept my permanent disability as a foregone conclusion. So back to the point...I don't want to just lie back and accept that my anxiety is going to dictate the rest of my life. At the moment, the only thing that helps is my PRN Klonopin, which I only use when I am complete losing my mind, because I don't want to build a tolerance to it and have it become completely useless. In case anyone is just skimming this, my question is, "What medications (other than benzos) have you taken that have successfully managed your anxiety (either by itself or as part of a cocktail for comormid conditions)?" I'd also love to hear about your less conventional successes (acupuncture, yoga, etc.). I really feel like this is one of the last pieces of the puzzle, particularly because I feel like my eating disorder is primarily anxiety-driven. Not that it would just go away if I were less anxious but that it would be easier for me to engage in conventional treatments if I weren't for, instance, terrified of treatment professionals. I see my p-doc tomorrow and I know I should have posted this days ago (but I just made the appointment today) and I was just wondering if there is anything that you would suggest that I mention. Thank you in an advance to any kind soul who takes the time to read this.
  13. I am taking Vyvanse 20 mg and I am feeling very tired on it. So, I doubled up on it to see if a stronger dose would help. I feel it but I also still feel lethargic and unwilling to do anything. Has this ever happened to anyone? Will it go away? Any other advice on what to do?
  14. I'm heading to the Mayo Clinic in January for bipolar treatment. Has anyone ever been? If so, were you hospitalized? Did you like/dislike it? What should I expect?
  15. Hello Everyone, I have bipolar 1 disorder and want to talk about an issue that bothers me to no end. I have been taken advantage of by people who I was either a friend with, had intimate relationships with, people have lied about my character and have gotten away with it, people have pushed themselves away from me due to several reasons and have yelled at me on several occasions. I am a strong person by nature, however I believe that the outcome of my relationships with people have been a cause of weakness due to the nature of this illness. It has ripped me alive, like so many others may agree. People can be mean and hurtful and it’s disheartening, depressing and overall unfortunate that I cannot face the world as strongly as I have been able to before. I guess I’m a little scared even despite being medicated, but I find that I still come across a person who snaps or yells or thinks they can take advantage of me in some way. Every chance I can get or every chance I can exercise courage, I damn well do but it’s rare. In spite of what I have control over, I still ruminate on all of these relationships. I find that I have very few relationships with people in general. All I really have is my family and that’s all I interact with all day and everyday. Have you ever experienced this downfall due to bipolar disorder in general and how do you overcome ruminating over these issues? And why are people so mean?
  16. I was recently prescribed Wellbutrin to go along with Lamotrigine (300 mg). I take Xanax, as needed. I was desperate. The depression, well, many of you know what that's like and how much can begin to fall apart/pile up around you. Just wondering - Anyone with BP have stories of experience on these two medications alone? Mainly curious. I'm trying it out either way. Years ago, I was on quite a cocktail of meds, but I try my hardest to limit them now...until I can't. It has been taking me a good three hours to be able to lift my body out of bed each morning, among other depression issues. Something had to change.
  17. Hi I know there is a sense of irony if you write NPD and then write help but any way... I was referred to see a personality disorder specialist which came to me as a surprise. Initially I assumed that my CPN(community psychiatric nurse) was thinking that I might have BPD despite having Bipolar Type 1 with proper full on psychotic and violent manic episodes. So I approached her with this assumption and said with a sarcastic tone 'Do you think I am over-sensitive?' 'Do you think I feel empty inside?' Do you think I'm overly emotional?' 'It's my bipolar diagnosis isn't it, the symptoms? 'I don't need bleeping CBT, all I need is my lithium and my quetipine!' Then, she said something I would have never expected, 'I think you might be suffering from narcissism. That's why I referred you to the PD specialists.' I was surprised and it got me thinking. Yes, I can be very selfish and yes I can be very arrogant, but isn't that normal? You are wandering now probably, narcissists would always hate the stigmas surrounding NPD (since it's about them), if I am a narcissist.......... wouldn't I avoid talking about it!? Well that is true, I denied it at first when I heard it, but today...this day, I am writing this post and I'm feeling like a really different person. You see, my depression side of my Bipolar came back and it's really intense at the moment. It started with anger and me being really grumpy but about a week ago I almost got admitted to hospital for feeling suicidal. At the moment I'm still depressed to that point, and a lot of memories are starting to came back, things that I found irrelevant, silly and funny and didn't feel any guilt or any tiny bit of remorse about them. There were some things that I did (non-violent things)........ I told various people(who had some history) to kill themselves or to cut themselves when I had arguments with them and got offended. Once I had an argument with this bossy girl when I was in a psychiatric ward a couple of years ago, she told me I'll never make anything out of my life, I got angry and wrote a letter with reasons why she should end her life and included a razor in it and gave it to her. Then I didn't really care and didn't felt guilty at all, and I did laugh afterwards when she came out with just three superficial scratches on her arm. I am a horrible person, I lie and lie all the time,I am such an experienced liar that I can make people believe anything I say and especially manipulate people to achieve my desires. I can be so superficial sometimes. I even just say horrible things on a day to day basis when I'm offended and that can be quite often. My house mate was telling me that I dream too high and I'll never reach the top because no one is perfect, I told her, I hope you choke on your own yoghurt (yoghurts are her weakness) Now that I'm depressed, surprisingly I can recognise all these tyrannical atrocities through an emotion called guilt which I don't normally feel. So if I have NPD, it goes away when I'm severely depressed. I just want to put it out there , in order to be a normal selfless person do I have to be severely depressed? So let's say I stay depressed, how do I deal with the guilt? Last week when I wasn't feeling so fab I wrote a suicide note and I wrote "I am monster, I'm horrible and I'm becoming more draconian as I grow, I need to stop this. Before it gets too late." I can't deal with the guilt... So I have two questions Am I narcissist? and how could I possibly accept help (when I am not depressed) since I'm so arrogant and selfish ? & Should I find a way to keep my self severely depressed since my personality is not the same as when I'm depressed and if I do, how to I deal with the guilt?
  18. Hi everyone, I'm not sure if this is the right forum to post this on, as I'm new to the site and haven't been diagnosed as DD. I've been diagnosed as Bipolar NOS (major depressive episodes and mixed episodes), but I know this forum will have more experience in answering my question... A while ago, I was experiencing a mixed episode and started cutting again. I hid it from my boyfriend, but eventually I knew he would find out and told him about it. He completely, completely freaked out. I'd trusted him and something just snapped inside me... The next thing I remember is being pinned down on the bed, wrapped in a blanket and my boyfriend asking whether I had calmed down and he could let me go. He was bruised and bleeding from me attacking him, but I have absolutely no recollection of doing this. It's not like I simply felt unreal or detached from myself. 'I', my sense of self, had disappeared and something else took over. I would never do things like this in 'normal' circumstances when I did not feel so deeply threatened and betrayed.This is the third time that something like this has happened to me in 5 years (I'm 21). It's not regular, but it's really damn scary. The amnesia surrounding these events is complete and irreversible. Even when they tell me what happened and I try to remember, I don't remember. I've done some reading and it seems like this isn't even 'normal' by depersonalisation/derealisation standards. Has anyone on the forum experienced this?
  19. I have always liked Lamictal. It makes me feel calmer, and I can definitely see how it makes me less anxious about the future and less nostalgic about the past. However, as I read through these forums, I'm noticing that people don't like Lamictal because they feel it inhibits their creativity and makes them not want to get out of bed. Although I like the way Lamictal makes me feel, I have noticed that I don't feel as creative as I used to and that sometimes all I want to do all day is watch television instead of being productive. Do you think those people with an adverse reaction to Lamictal have an underlying depressive disorder and so Lamictal becomes more of a burden than a help? Also, doesn't bipolar disorder often increase creativity anyway, so once you are controlling it, that associated creativity goes away? I'm just hoping that this medication isn't making my mind cloudy and my memory bad (I have noticed my memory getting shoddier) because I really enjoy how it controls my anxiety. However, I'm a graduate student and both my memory and my creativity are extremely important to both my career and my happiness. I would like to hear other peoples' experiences in regards to this matter. Full disclosure: I tried taking Adderall today with Lamictal, and I felt like my old self with both memory and creativity. Although I'm not prescribed it, I took only like 5 mg (not even kidding- I broke a 20 mg into four parts) and it affected me in the most amazing of ways. I used to abuse Adderall when I was an undergraduate (even snorting it to feel the rush), but the way I feel afterwards makes up for the fogginess I feel sometimes otherwise. I have looked up the side affects of mixing Adderall and Lamictal, and I haven't found anything problematic. I would like to know if anyone has had any adverse reactions to this combination.
  20. I thought it would be interesting to hear others' thoughts on this topic. The Iraq and Afghanistan Wars have brought issues of military service and mental illness to the fore, with high rates of post-enlistment diagnosis. About five years into the Iraq War, I looked into the possibility of serving (in the U.S. Navy). I was asked what medications I was taking (no questions about diagnoses, though I was BPII). I said I was on Paxil , and was told that I would need to be off that medication a full year before I could enlist. Later, after my medication regime had changed, this time to Lithium, I thought I would check again, less because I thought Lithium would be more acceptable and more because I wondered if perhaps the policy had changed--for want of troops and because that policy seemed to incentivize untreated mental illness in a war zone. The policy had not changed. Some thoughts for discussion with anyone who cares to discuss them: I believe that the military has a responsibility to protect its soldiers and noncombatants. I believe the consensus of the mental health profession is that serious mental illnesses are not temporary diagnoses, which would seem to make electing to forgo life-saving medication medically unsound. The U.S. military might be said to economically incentivize this course of action. Furthermore, although many mentally ill soldiers are not a risk to others, some are. Knowingly putting persons less-well-equipped to handle stress into situations of high-stress seems irresponsible. And then we have situations where soldiers are known to be mentally ill, don't receive proper treatment, and go on to commit crimes. They are punished as though the factor of mental illness has no mitigating power, and as though the U.S. military has no culpability in employing mentally ill soldiers and in not doing enough to remove them from combat situations. And then there's my friend, who served two tours of duty in Iraq, was awarded the purple heart, and has had great difficulty in getting mental health assistance through the VA. These are all instances in which the military might be said to be failing our (mentally ill) people. (I can hunt down specific sources for you if you'd like them.) Are their still ways for our people to serve? I'm good at languages, for example, and at medical things. And aside from my mental illness, I'm a rather athletic person. I'm a good team player--able to give orders and to take them, able to get results. My medication makes me better able to do these things. Why would I want to leave them at home? We best know our own diseases. We don't want to hurt others. We best know how to protect others from our own diseases. I don't like guns. They're loud and they hurt my shoulder. Maybe if these were saber days we'd be having a different conversation. I don't understand why, when I can go out my door right now and run five miles, do "boy" push-ups, have the respect of men when I speak, and have a decent stack of letters and "W's" and "sportsmanship" awards from high school, that when I say "put me in, coach," I can't even get an audition for a theater from which it seems like everyone is walking away. What do you think? Should our people be given an audition? Do our illnesses necessarily make us a military liability? And how is targeting mental illness medications in war zones not a terrible, terrible idea?
  21. So. I am tired of feeling tired! This day time drowziness, somnolence, sleepiness during the day... WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT. It has been going on for 7 fucking days now. And I want to take ownership of my life then sleep 12 hours... and bask on the couch for another 7 hours for a total of 19 hours on the couch doing absolutely nothing but listening to a fan whistle. So I am making the cut, cutting the 80 mg latuda in HALF. What? I can't? You mean I won't get equal amounts if, if there is no line on the pill. WAIT! THERE IS NO FUCKING LINE ON THE PILL. But I'm so tired being tired god dammit. I really so tired being so tired. The days foil into nights and back into days. All because of the antipsychotic latuda, is your name latuda? It should be called sleeeptuda because that's how I feel with you. So you are going to get cut up anyways. I will deal with you and the psychiatrist when I wake up because i know at least tomorrow when I wake up I wouldn't be so fucking zombified. Do I want to do this for a year. I can hardly tolerate a fucking week of this shit. But that is it for me. I am done. You all can tell me it is wrong to do but I am tired of being tired. Tired of being tired TIRED OF BEING TIRED!
  22. I cant escape it... I just fall helplessly into a depression... a rolling tide of depression if you call it. I don't know why... my life really shouldn't be that bad but it "feels" bad. I am falling asleep constantly, I have no motivation to do anything, and yet this is why I was put on a antipsychotic to begin with, to slow your world down. I use to wake up at 5:30 AM to 6:30 AM and living off of bread and chex mix. This was when life was hell for me because I felt poor, but couldn't ever conceive myself ever having a job because I was still "mentally ill." These are powerful words that I couldn't quite get the strength and still can't get the strength to believe I can ever work. But here I sit ruminating, one of the worst things I could possibly be doing on a sunday night, is to constantly ruminate. I have a beer to drink and thoughts to escape into. But not pretty thoughts. What happened to those days where I could at least care about people, and have friends. Did I lose myself or did I get lost after my father's pulmonary embolism? I was in fear, fear that I couldn't take care of myself, fear that would envelop me like a certain kind of fierce beast. I freeze, I don't fight or fly. I freeze. And that is what I am doing right here. I wish I could fix my life. I have over $1000 in psychiatry bills because the billing department said that they can't do anything about it. And I got myself sleeping 12 hours a day plus an hour passed out on the couch. That is 13 hours on a couch , sometimes even 16 hours. You see I am also a failing internet marketer, always trying out new things but never quite getting the grasp of the entire system. The friends online don't last long, and those that do seem to more or less of a parasite grinding you down till you have no blood left. It is horrid. My last ex continuously says we are in a friendship/relationship, but she HAD to ad relationship. That is why I blocked her but even her company is better than nothing. It is a lonely world when you feel alone. And I seem to pour an empty bottle of beer, as nothing else is left. Ever heard of that saying, "drink your sorrows away." I seem to do just that, into sadness, hopelessness and despair. I feel poor, and I don't like the feeling. But I also feel poor in mind and body. Anyone can go to a store pick up groceries, pick up a check, but reality is it is harder than you think living with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. First it takes regulation of medications with doctor, and that can take awhile. I was sensing I was doing well but in reality, I was doing well, But now I am not. I am doing quite poor. Not meeting the needs of my Adult Rehabiliative Mental Health Service worker, not applying to volunteering meet ups or jobs. Sign how can you? I am tired all the time. I feel tired all the time. Where is the energy? I am sleeping all the time. God please help my soul. Amen.
  23. I am on Lithium, and have predominantly Manic episodes. The Lithium is helping the mood swings, but not my Anxiety, so I am going to soon be trying Lyrica for my Anxiety. Does anybody else have experience with the combination, OE even just Lyrica for anxiety? Any input would be awesome. :-)
  24. Immediately upon starting Risperdal about 3 months ago I started experiencing rapid eye twitching from left to right that lasts no more than half a second. It has been quite persistent throughout the last few months. A few weeks ago I played video games (which I rarely do, first time since starting Risperdal) and the eye twitching kept happening every five minutes or less, constantly messing me up in the game. I blank out when I have the twitching, everything turns white for a moment. The twitching happens often when I focus in on something, when I'm looking at an electronic screen, usually. It can be exacerbated by caffeine. My mother was the first person to see it and today she recommended me call my pdoc and let him know as she thinks it's a seizure. I'm on Wellbutrin which lowers the seizure threshold and also Risperdal which does the same. My thinking is the two are working together to produce partial seizures if that is indeed what is happening. Has anyone else had experiences with seizures from these medications? After looking online this could be a seizure especially is exacerbated by screens and lights and video games but it could also just be a muscle twitch. That's what I thought it was all along. And even if it is a seizure, simple eye movements for a split second isn't all that dangerous or annoying.
  25. Hi Everyone, Quick Timeline: In 2009, I was initially diagnosed with MDD, ADHD and also had anxiety issues. Then in 2012, I was re-diagnosed with Bipolar I Disorder, accompanied with ADHD and still have anxiety issues but with no official diagnosis for the anxiety. However, I do take anti-anxiety meds. My medication cocktail entails Abilify 10mg, Adderall 20 mg, Ativan .5mg and Lamictal 200mg and I take everything in the morning. However, I truly believe that there is something very wrong with this med combination and that I have the wrong diagnosis. Some days, I may feel somewhat energetic and can start my tasks but then the energy disappears midday. Most days, I feel fatigued, miserable, a loss of concentration, tired and even become depressive sometimes. With these particular days (even right now), I just do nothing all day... which all happened... today. I think that the Abilify/Lamictal combo is a no-go. Secondly, the Adderall is ineffective probably because all of the other medications cancel the hell out of it. Thirdly, I do not think that I have Bipolar Disorder. I think that I have MDD for sure, hence why I think that the Lamictal is a no-go even by itself. I've even tried supplements - 5 Hour Energies, Vitamin B12, Fish Oil, Vitamin D, etc... not all during the same time period. But of course, they still don't help. Oh, and trust me, I've told my pdoc about all of this, but he doesn't have much to say except to go up on the Abilify - part of what makes me feel tired and miserable...smh. Does anyone have ANY insight? I'd like to know what others think about this issue...
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