Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'couples thereapy'.
Found 1 result
I've been in this relationship for 5 years. We have a baby boy together. Much of the time we are happy together and are compatible. We want the same things out of life. I made a post on here over 2 years ago talking about domestic violence. He was violent towards me a lot. It was not just pushing and slapping. It was very, very violent (though nothing broken thankfully). It got better for a while. Then it returned and got better again. There's been a lot of arguing though, but that got better as well. He certainly has issues with anger, and I always believed it could be worked out with medication and therapy despite the severity. There were a few shady instances. The most recent one is when he went missing. He claimed he was working late, when in reality he was with his friend who he claimed was suicidal. I was also self-harming at the time and he knew. Anyway, I never knew where he was until the next day. We also have issues with finances. He gets himself further and further into debt behind my back and tells me it is not my concern. In January, his mother was murdered by her husband. Absolutely tragic and sent him spiraling. He refused to get help, but he did not revert back to being violent towards me. Our relationship was ok for a while. Until out of the blue he tells me he doesn't want me anymore. He doesn't love me anymore. This continues for a while. He avoids me and does not come home after work. He outright does not want to be around me. He claims it is because he cannot handle my own emotional instability and is tired of walking on eggshells. He says our relationship is toxic, and the way he feels towards me has changed. He soon asked me to leave, and at first, I didn't want to. I thought he needed me. Until his words got stronger, "What would it take for you to leave." And that was when I took our son and left. I was a stay at home mom, and so I had nothing. I left the state with our 3-year-old to stay with family. I told him not to make any big decisions until we take some time a part because of what happened with his mom. I strongly believed that was what this was over. So technically, we were still together and just taking some time away from each other. He agreed. Three days later, he took our engagement status (we never got legally married) off of facebook. When I called him, he said he knew we were done. So began to move forward with my life. 2 weeks later, I went to get my things and he began to tell me he made a mistake, but also said he did not know what he wanted. So I got my things and left. A few days later, he calls and says he wants me back. At this point, We had been a part for a total of 6 weeks (including the few days I was there getting my things). I've been living in a different state. He only once saw a grief counselor like we agreed upon before I ever left. However, he said he would do anything for me. I'm not sure what to do. He was violent with me in the past, although that stopped. He said he didn't want me. He wasn't doing anything to prove it to me, and at this point, I started dating someone else (nothing serious). My family seems insistent I should return to try again or at least get past any unresolved feelings, but I'm at a total loss. My heart breaks to hear him upset and wanting me back. But I cannot deny that I may feel happier where I am now, but there's not telling that it will last.