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  1. Had a tiny fight with my psychiatrist, he seems to be dobuting my diagnosis. In the hospital they tried to say i was bpd with bipolar, but my psychologist says i cant be bpd and even my psychiatrist used to think im not. I dont have any bpd traits other than emotional inestability. Anyways im mad bc people dobut my psychotic symptoms he thinks is just something from my imagination or something "typical" from me. Im mad bc the new medication is not working and now i have panic attacks i didnt had before. The hospital kinda helped kinda made things worse. I feel like my doctor has left me behin
  2. I am having a lot of problems. I am enrolled in a mental health program, and I (finally) see the psychiatrist in 2 weeks, but I am basically holding on my a thread until then, because it feels like my only hope. I'm 34 and I still have no real diagnosis, because I've never been able to access medical care for long enough to get one. The current tentative one is Bipolar II with Eating Disorder in remission, but I've been given ADHD, GAD, OCD, OCPD, MDD in the past, plus Gender Dysphoria and some autoimmune activity as well. Also pretty deep poverty. I am cripplingly depressed and dys
  3. Hi! I'm new to the board and I'm not even sure if this is the right place to post this. I was diagnosed with bipolar at age 20 but mostly I had depressive episodes. Some years later my episodes changed to light mood swings with hallucinations, delusions and "strange behavior" like wearing wigs and sunglasses to distract the people I thought was chasing me. In the current "episode" I have no mood alterations I just started to feel sure I was going to die soon. Like a hunch. Shortly after that I started seeing angels that visit me because I'm gonna die soon. I also hear a voice that tells me I'm
  4. Hi, everyone. So I'm almost 20, and I know that ASD is usually diagnosed in the early years of life. But I'm about 85% sure that I have ASD. The only problem is, I don't know how to go about finding someone to tell me whether or not I have it. Does anyone know what I should do?
  5. I don't know how to feel ... I got used to the idea that I was just stupid because my past haunts me but now I'm not and my past really is the issue, not my perception of it? I feel confused, angry, and a bit hurt that nobody believed me until this last IP stay. Anybody else have this problem?
  6. Hi All, I'm new here and I am so grateful for this space. I received a tentative BP II (I believe rapid cycling) dx a rather long time ago (over a decade), and have been on a mood stab. since then (lamictal). The thing is, I'm not certain if this fits me. I know you can't dx me, but I am hoping that maybe someone shares my experience, or can shed some light on what's going on for me. All of this is based on a fairly shaky memory of the time + my parents memory. Way back then, in my pre-teen days, I presented as having periods of being "stable," active and generally good. Very sudde
  7. My name is Stephane, and I've been recently diagnosed with borderline and/or bipolar II...which is where my dilemma comes in. My psychologist believes I have borderline PD, my psychiatrist, who spends more time with me, believes I have rapid cycling bipolar II. I see my psychologist once a month and my psychiatrist twice a week. I've tried to get them to talk to each other to come up with one concrete diagnosis, but they only want to go through me. I know a diagnosis won't define me, but I sure wish I knew what I am so I can come up with a plan of action. Has anyone else had this issue? I beli
  8. I know it says it in most of our signatures, but I was wondering if we could get a thread going of what antipsychotic(s) we are taking regardless of diagnosis, what dose, how well it/each work on a scale from 1-10, and its side effect(s) + any good side effects: I take: antipsychotic: risperidone dose: 3mg performance: 6 out of 10 effectiveness effects: I have a large appetite and its hard to keep the pounds off and I sleep 10-12 hours. It keeps my symptoms under my control. I am wondering if there is something better.
  9. There are things regarding my Mental Health that I need to inform my Pdoc and Tdoc. It does effect my treatment; medications and therapy. However it does not involve self harm or anything of that nature (more on the lines of symptoms they don't know about). I have a fear of 'unwarranted' diagnosis, stemming from past situations that causes major trust issues in telling things to my current team. Basically it is getting harder hiding things from them, and I need to share some symptoms before I go into any kind of crisis (we well as preventing crisis, and just getting correct treatment). To be a
  10. I know I could just read the lists of symptoms, but they never really seem to capture what weird brain stuff is like when it actually happens, so I thought maybe if I described what happens to me someone out there could go "yes, that's it!" or "meh, no, you're on the wrong path here." This seems to have gotten long, but I don't have anyone in meatspace to ask other than my p-doc, so I figured I'd be detailed. I'm 43, and I have long term (30+ years, starting at least in early teens) major chronic depression with looong depressive episodes, especially the last 5 years or so. Also GAD, sa
  11. I was diagnosed bipolar type 1 in July of 2013 and have gone from 300mg of lithium a day and 80mg of Geodon a day to just 60mg of Geodon a day over the course of that year and a half. I have been completely stable since my first and only manic episode back in 2013. About three months ago, my psychiatrist told me that she wanted to slowly take me off meds because at the time of my psychotic break (or manic episode) I was smoking a LOT of weed and refaced childhood sexual abuse for the first time since it happened to me and those two things could have contributed to a psychotic meltdown. In o
  12. I've been progressing through treatment with a psychiatrist, at last, after many years of problems and have had increasing success as medication has been applied. It now seems, though, there may be hypothyroidism at play (Hashimoto). Reading up on this form of the condition, it seems to present with many symptoms associated with mental illness. I'm wondering, if this is possibly the source of much or all of my symptoms, why have the medications prescribed by my psychiatrist been particularly effective? (at least in some key areas) While I'm here, has anyone else had a similar experience?
  13. I can't wrap my head around my diagnosis. Is my pdoc sure about it? What if it's a mistake? Since I am diagnosed, I feel as though I can't be anything except my diagnosis. All I did, do or think becomes my MI, if I really have one. I do not know how to tell you this, but I feel like if I ignore it it will go away. I'm not at idiot. I know my issues won't go away. I guess I am in denial. Maybe I have something else entirely? I don't know anymore. Has anyone went through this and got out of it at least a little because I can't seem to see far beyond what I tell you now.
  14. Over the last month or so, I've been turning to you guys at Crazyboards to seek some common ground, as I sure don't feel it where I'm at. I'm 32, live in a major city w/ my boyfriend, and my sincerest hope is to be able to save up enough money to move out of state for graduate school. By trade I'm a fairly disappointing legal secretary, where I'm daily treated like dirt by my coworkers no matter how hard I try to do my best. This is what happens when you have nothing but work-study office work experience to put on a resume as an undergrad. Nevermind how mindnumbingly bored I was after day one
  15. i'm gonna try to say this as concisely as i can because my journey with mental illness has been a long one (even though i'm only 19 lol) (omg i'm now reading over this as i'm writing and this is basically my life story in a nutshell please bare with me!!!) as a very young child, i was very happy but extremely hyperactive. once i started school, i started exhibiting clear signs of mental illness - the hyperactivity persisted, along with tantrums, angry outbursts, impulse control issues, and general unhappiness. (also, funny story, for some reason cravings for carbs are a sign of childhood
  16. Any time I finally get the nerve to talk about something that's been bothering me, I feel like I am not taken seriously. The only thing I can figure is that I'm not sobbing in front of them or having a hissy fit, so they assume it's not a big deal. I dont' know how other people act when they're in that room; I certainly show little emotion other than occasional pessimism and chronic irritation. I have now brought up the ASD issue with FOUR counselors and everyone just dismisses me. One gave me an ADHD questionnaire and never gave any others because he was already 'sure' it was ADHD before
  17. Okay, I know that I have a mental illness. It shows. But I have been in a guessing game for almost five years now. I was told by my psychology teacher that it is very much a guessing game because there is no like blood test or something or another to tell. Which it's very hard getting tossed back and forth and flipped all around. I want people to know that they are not alone. I have struggled with people listening to me as well I recently changed my psychologist because mine was a pill pusher. So you are not alone if you are being flip flopped. It's hard and if you need any support I am he
  18. Right then this is my first post about my personal issues so I'm not entirely sure where to start but I'll do my best to sum things up. I may ramble quite a bit... I am currently not sure what to do with myself, every route I've taken has either dissapointed me or completely ignored me. I have had mental health issues from a very young age (6 or 7) ,noticeable symptoms of an anxiety disorder manifested at around this age and as I got closer to puberty these symptoms became more and more severe. Accompanying these symptoms at the beginning of my teens was the onset of Depression. Up until the a
  19. Hello, Everybody! I just thought I'd make a poll out of curiosity to see how many people are on either Atypical Antipsychotics or Typical Antipsychotics and for what reason. I feel it'd be interesting just to get a feel for how many people are on them for indicated vs off-label treatments, and with the rise in prescriptions written for these drugs, thought it'd give a good perspective for anybody who may be curious. I personally am not on any AP's, but once was on Zyprexa for about a week. For me, it made me feel incredibly numbed and unhappy, so it was discontinued. I, however, do not h
  20. I have no idea what is going on in my head. I was diagnosed with depression 20+ years ago, but the past year have had what feels like hypomanic episodes, most recently I don't know if I've been having ultra-rapid cycling or mixed state bipolar. I'll have a few days of really really high energy, talking fast, making lots of plans, taking on new projects, spending, not sleeping, then low energy and irritation, the whole time though with thoughts of death and suicide almost all the time. I've been missing a lot of class and can't concentrate very well at school or work. Due to a screw up with my
  21. Hey guys, just wanted to say hello to all you OCD'ers out there and thought I'd start a thread for OCPD. As msot of you know, OCPD stands for Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, which I was diagnosed with about 2 years ago. Essentially, it means that you don't have a compulsive trigger & response, (checking, counting, turning knobs certain ways, etc), but rather entails your entire life being something you want to manage and alter to a state of perfection in any way possible. I've attached an interesting description of OCPD that's from the OCD Foundation itself, which includes
  22. First, I want to thank you all for sharing your stories of pain. It has helped me realize much in the past several months. Secondly, I hope nobody minds me posting, but I am desperate for something, anything to change. I am not struggling with an illness. My 16 yr old son is and I was hoping to get some advice. Over this summer he smoked K2 and suffered a psychotic break and was admitted to acute care for 9 days after which it was like “a light came on” and he was sent home stabilized. In my mind, I thought it was over. It HAD to be the K2. Since then, over a span of 3 months he has been back
  23. I recently found out that my diagnosis is now Bipolar I. This shocked me. I do not really think that I'm BP1, as I feel that my manic highs were med-induced, and I've stated this clearly to my doctor. Apparently, he feels differently. I also probably sound like I'm in denial right now, which I may be, but to be fair, I haven't had a manic episode in a year now. I feel that I would have had another manic episode in the past year if I was truly bipolar. But I digress... Does the BP 1 diagnosis really harm me at all even if I'm not bp 1? I'm being treated for my symptoms - I've got no more hal
  24. I've always felt my problems, while complicated and layered over the years, stem from a physical cause*. I've been and am undergoing psychiatric treatment. I finally had a CT scan of my brain yesterday but that came back all clear. I'm both happy and disappointed. I was anxious opening it and half expecting to see something horrible, even something I could notice. It was great to see and read that my brain's doing well But, I was disappointed the results didn't indicate what can be done to speed up my treatment or eventually solve my problems. Anyway, that's all a bit irrelevant, I'm wonde
  25. I've been slowly progressing through medication towards a happier, more productive life but since I last saw my Psychiatrist I'm thinking he's having trouble finding where I fit in. He's sending me off for new blood tests and a CT scan to check for other issues. Tests and scan aside, in preparation for my next appointment I'm trying to write up a raw list of what I can report in terms of symptoms and my status on the current meds. Here's what I've got at the moment (what I can answer yes, no, mild, etc to) .. Delusions Hallucinations OCD Paranoia Anxiety Thought disorder Mood both cur
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