Jump to content

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'hospital'.

More search options

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


  • Stuff That Makes You Feel Like Crap
    • Bipolar Spectrum Disorder - The Pole Dance
    • Depression - Let a WHAT Be My Fucking Umbrella? (Sod You, Perry Como)
    • Self-injury - The Cutting Board
    • Personality Disorders - Fuck Off! No, Wait. Fuck Me Now!
    • Eating Disorders - Hell's Kitchen
    • Substance Abuse / Addictive Behavior - 8-balls, Highballs, Deal Me in One Last Time
    • Panic / Anxiety Disorders - What, Me Worry?
    • PTSD and Trauma- Duck and Cover. Again and Again.
    • Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder - Click Here Repeatedly
    • Social Phobia - Behind Paranoid Eyes
    • Dissociative Disorders - Now where was I?
    • Schizophrenia and Various Psychoses -- Jesus Had a Twin Who Knew Nothing About Sin
    • ADD/ADHD - Could You Say That Again? I Was Listening to My Head.
    • Autistic Spectrum Disorders - What Part of English Don't You Understand?
    • Migraines and Other Headaches - Not Tonight, Dear
    • Neuropathic and Chronic Pain
    • Seizure Disorders - Shake, Rattle and Roll
    • Sleep Disorders - Perchance to Dream
    • Allergies: Benadryl? No, But I Have a Cousin Who Was a Dremel.
    • Hormone and Glandular Problems - How Do You Make a Hormone? Kick Her in the Ankle.
    • Not Otherwise Specified - Put your finger on your NOS, on your NOS
  • Meds and Other Crap That Make Life Tolerable
    • Anticonvulsants / Mood Stabilizers - Bodies A-Twitchin', Moods A-Switchin'
    • Antidepressants - If You're Crappy and You Know It
    • Cocktails - Medicated to the Gills and Floundering
    • Antipsychotics / Neuroleptics / Major Tranquilizers - The Acme Pill-O-Matics
    • Miscellaneous Medications & Miscellaneous Questions About Meds
    • Benzodiazepines - Take a Chill Pill!
    • CNS Stimulants - Warped & Wired
    • Side Effects - It Turned Me into a Newt! A Newt? I Got Better.
    • What The Hell is THAT? - Medical, Nutritional, and Lifestyle Alternatives
    • Therapy - The Other Half of the Puzzle
    • ECT etc. - Watt's up, Doc?
  • Crap You Read About
    • Academic Interests - Geek Out While You Freak Out
    • Books Reviews - Self Help and Otherwise
  • Life Cycle: Mate Spawn and Die
    • Family Feud
    • Parenting/Pregnancy/Childhood Issues - Nature or Nurture
    • Relationship Issues - Crazy For Loving You
    • Aging Issues: Hot Flashes and Hot Rods? Midlife Crisis, Menopause, and Beyond
    • Spirituality - Luminous Beings Are We, Not This Crude Matter
    • Grief, Death and Dying
  • Your Crappy Life
    • The Health Care System Sucks!
    • Law, Money, and Employment -- Send Lawyers Guns and Money
    • Technology Sucks! - Luddites Unite!
    • News and Politics - Next on Sick Sad World
    • People Suck!
    • Gay/Lesbian/Bi/Transgendered Issues - Out of the Closet and Out of Our Minds
    • Intro to Being a Crazy Student - Whatsamatta U
    • The Confessional
    • I've *Still* Got Issues!
  • Other Crap
    • Whatever
    • I Got the Good Stuff Here
  • Generic Forum Crap
    • Board News - Incoming Message from The Big Giant Head
    • Suggestion Board - I'm Sorry Dave, I'm Afraid I Can't Do That
    • New User Info - It's Not Easy Being Green
    • Introductions - Who The Hell Are You?
    • Moderators - Pay No Attention to the People Behind the Curtain
    • Test Board - Do Not Push the Big Red Button!
  • Coronavirus: Because You Don’t Have Enough Crap On Your Mind
    • I Need An Adult!: Where to Find Accurate Information
    • Has Anyone Told the Amish?: Covid-19 in the Media
    • Social Distancing: I’ve Never Felt Closer to You
    • Telemedicine: Is This Thing On? Getting the Most Out of Screen Time With Your Doctor
    • Oh, No, I Couldn’t... Well, Maybe Just One More: Hoarding. Or, uh, Being Prepared
    • Casual Everyday: How to Stop Watching Cat Videos and Get Some Work Done At Home
    • Absolutely No One Walked Into a Bar: Best of Coronavirus Humor
    • But I Need a Damn Haircut: When You Don’t Have the Virus, But You’re Still Falling Apart
    • Countin’ Flowers On the Wall: So Bored We Need a Board For It

Find results in...

Find results that contain...

Date Created

  • Start


Last Updated

  • Start


Filter by number of...


  • Start





Website URL







Found 10 results

  1. Hey y’all thanks in advance for the help. So i have bpd and for a strange reason i am absolutely obsessed with getting hurt so i have to go to the hospital. I don’t understand it maybe one of you guys do?
  2. I don't understand ANY of this and i'm fed up. I haven't left home in months, the clinician who has been occasionally coming to my home has said she doesn't believe in hospitalization for anything other than emergencies and can't personally do anything to get me into hospital anyway. I am feeling completely hopeless. I have a long history with the local hospital(only hospital in our city) and i've been repeatedly denied admission. I'm only 18 and i've been dealing with this joke of a mental health system for over 3 years. Along with anxiety and major depressive disorder, I was also diagnosed with BPD "traits" by an emergency department physician I saw for 10 minutes when I was 15, which was the start of this all. Looking back at my old posts really show how long i've been going through this. I have anxiety and depression almost 24/7. Every day is a struggle to just get by and normal activities stress me out so much. Due to myself being unable to leave home because of anxiety, i've not been seeing doctors or real therapists(besides the clinician that has come to my home). Nothing has been accomplished. The most recent meeting was to try and get me into the psychiatric unit, but obviously that didn't work out. The emergency department is obviously always an option, but I am 90% certain I will be sent home instead of kept inpatient. To them, it doesn't matter how suicidal I am(even if I have a plan). Last time I went was in March and was sent home(Which I made a post about as well). I don't know what their deal is. Apparently its not uncommon in Canada, but how is this legal? What DOES it take to get in? I seriously need intensive help. I can't focus on outpatient therapy while i'm this unstable. This is one of my old posts made more than 2 years ago. I really appreciate all the responses and suggestions and i've tried almost all of them. It seems like i'm just a hopeless case at this point, especially since nobody will help me. Its just hard to believe sometimes. A lot has changed since then, including the fact that I no longer even have a psychiatrist.
  3. Ward 81 & Oregon State Hospital 1975 - 2005 Images from Mary Ellen Mark’s series Ward 81 have been floating around the internet lately. I feel a special connection, however, as I explored the hospital in its abandoned state. The old hospital buildings were torn down four years after I visited in 2005. Though Mark’s work is well known, the hospital’s biggest fame was as the filming location for One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s nest. I have provided both Mary Ellen Mark’s 1975 photographs as well as my own for contrast, to show what became of the hospital 30 years on. I also provided images of my artwork that are based on the 2005 visit. The paintings are part of a larger series of works based off different abandoned hospitals I visited over the years. When I requested access to Oregon State Hospital, the right wing to the main building had been slowly vacated ward by ward until the early 90’s when it was left to moulder in the damp Oregon weather. By the time I arrived, the top two floors were in ruins. The tiles were essentially just rubble spattered with bird and rat droppings. The paint on the walls had largely peeled away. Strangely enough, the bathrooms were in perfect condition, the tile looked almost untouched. Because the left wing held dangerous prisoners, it took quite some time to get permission to view the interior. I was given a visitor’s pass and a guide (an old man who had worked there as an orderly since the late 60’s). He was able to tell me about what went on in the abandoned wards during his time working there, which was helpful. The stories weren’t flattering to the hospital and his candour surprised me as he was still employed there. I suppose his supervisors weren’t around to hear, so he felt safe talking. I hope you all find this interesting. The quote below leads to Karen Folger Jacob’s full text on Mark’s website. I posted her pictures here because many of them seem to have been taken down from the current website gallery. I archived the site on my computer many years ago, thankfully, so I have the content in full. Enjoy... “In 1975, photographer Mary Ellen Mark was assigned by a magazine to do a story on the making of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, shot on location at the Oregon State Hospital, a mental institution. While there, she met, briefly, the women of Ward 81.Ward 81 is the women's security ward of the hospital, the only locked ward for women in the state. The women on this ward are considered dangerous to themselves or to others.In February of 1976, Mary Ellen and Karen Folger Jacobs, a writer and social scientist, were given permission to live on the ward in order to photograph and interview the women. They spent thirty-six days on Ward 81.” ----
  4. I have a small but strong group of girlfriends who are as supportive as they can be about my MI. They try to understand, though they don't REALLY understand. I am thankful for them, don't get me wrong... I have, however, met some great friends through hospital, and they really do understand me. I wondered if anyone else has had this experience? Over the three IP visits I had in 2013, (3 days, 4 weeks, 6 weeks) I collected 6 friends, a mix of male and female, that I see or speak to regularly. They are a mix of MIs, including bipolar, schizophrenia, depression, anxiety, BPD, OCD and PTSD. We used to meet at a cafe regularly (until recently, as I've moved) and just spend time together, as they also did not have jobs to go to during the day, like my other friends did. They really enrich my life. We talk about MI and coping some of the time, but we also talk about other stuff - just normal life. We shared some stressful experiences in the hospital, and those really bonded us. It is nice sometimes to talk about those days and joke about the useless nurses we had or the weird quirky pdocs. Kind of takes the sting out of those memories. The friends I've made IP also made it so much more bearable while I was there. Has anyone else met some great friends with MI whilst in the hospital?
  5. Hello lovelies! So, some back story first. I'm a 22 year old female. Diagnosis history: Age 8: Anxiety/panic disorder Age 12: Depression Age 15: ADD Age 19: minor OCD During elementary school I dealt with very severe anxiety symptoms. I had frequent panic attacks, wasn't able to eat lunch in the school cafeteria, and I had separation anxiety from my mother. I was started on Paxil which helped. In middle school I was diagnosed with depression. I was taken off Paxil and prescribed 20mg Lexapro per day, which was later brought up to 40mg. I self-harmed mildly and infrequently for several years but quit on my own and without psychiatric intervention. I was on 40mg of Lexapro per day up until this past March. I felt that while it had my anxiety almost completely under control (it was at least very manageable most of the time) but I was lacking motivation for many day-to-day activities. I felt tired often and like I had no drive to do day-to-day tasks. At this point I was switched to fluoxetine (aka Prozac) 20 mg per day. I found that it made me feel much more agitated than the Lexapro, but I thought it was pretty manageable so I started taking it every other day (my own choice, I did not consult with a doctor on this). That was working fine until two weeks ago, when out of nowhere I started to experience very bad anxiety symptoms for the first time in a good ten years. It started somewhat mild, with restlessness and some agitation. Then, when I tried going to my job, I felt very trapped and anxious, nauseous, and generally very agitated. After that it gradually got worse and I was less and less able to leave the house. I felt light-headed, agitated, anxious, etc. I had some leftover Lexapro and called my psych's office to see if I could switch back to that. My primary psych doc is out of the office til late October so I just spoke with the nurse on call. I was switched back to Lexapro, 40 mg a day, immediately. The next two days my symptoms were worse and my mother drove up to my apartment and took me to the ER. The told me I'd taken too much Lexapro too soon and to cut the dose to 20mg per day for a week and see how I was feeling. Two days ago was the height of the severity of my symptoms. I started feeling pressure in my chest like I couldn't breathe, I thought I was going to pass out, and I was having severe muscle tremors constantly. I couldn't walk to the kitchen without having to shake my hands and arms and even my neck. I felt weak because I'd been shaking my legs so fiercely for so many hours overnight and hadn't slept. I was having severe nausea and repeatedly almost vomited, so I called an ambulance, worried I was experiencing severe serotonin syndrome or something. At the hospital I was given Ativan which calmed me down significantly and basically put me to sleep, since I hadn't gotten more than probably 3 hours of sleep in 48 hours. I was given an Ativan prescription, as well as Zofran for nausea. Yesterday I visited a psychologist at the same clinic where my primary psych doc usually sees me. He prescribed Ativan, .5mg twice daily as needed, and klonopin, .5mg twice daily as needed. He believes I do have some mild serotonin toxicity so I am now off of Lexapro and Fluoxetine. So here's where you guys come in! Have any of you had an experience like this? What helped? I'm currently feeling less anxious and less agitated, but still slightly uneasy. More prevalent is the fact that I can't stop wiggling my leg. If I start to feel worse I'll have to start shaking my hands or my head too. It's like I can't sit still and I'm extremely restless and need to keep moving, so my leg is constantly shaking. The klonopin and ativan seem to calm it down a bit, but not completely. Thoughts? I can't try to go back on the Lexapro for awhile because there's too much serotonin in me right now. (Doc said maybe a week off of it would be okay.) Some concerns: Klonopin and ativan really relax me, so I've just been in bed for two days, basically. I worry about worsening depression symptoms. What if this leg shaking doesn't go away? Have any of you dealt with increased motor movement from anxiety where you just can't stop moving one or more of your body parts? Any other stories, tips, input, advice, etc would be so greatly appreciated! I haven't been this unwell in many, many years and I wanted to reach out to a community like this one where I'd feel a little less alone in dealing with this. Thank you all so much, and I hope you're all doing well today.
  6. Hello all from a fellow bipolar. who is in urgent need of advice from other bipolars... this is long, but please take time to read it, my thoughts are hard to express in a clear way right now. I did the best I could. I really need advice. First off, I'll sum this up. I don't feel crazy and I can't understand why people are telling me I'm not acting normally. This is all coming from my husband. I have to establish very clearly that he is a calm, level headed, patient man who has been only a blessing for me since the day we met. Right now he is very worried about me but I don't understand why, as much as he tells me things. Here is my history... I am diagnosed as having bipolar 1. In the past few years, I suffer almost exclusively with mixed episodes on the psychotic side of things. This usual manifests as a sandwich of rage/love/despair/gratefulness/hopelessness/intense optimism/laughter/crying/suicidal all at once. That and I start getting delusions and auditory hallucinations. I've dealt with this illness for 11 years so I am pretty aware of warning signs and symptoms that require help. I'm 100% compliant to pills and counselling. Right now I don't feel in the throws of my usual mixed episodes and I don't feel a danger to myself so long as I am not in a situation where I am alone. I can't be alone because that does make things crazy. The reason I am writing is that right now I have this weird split going on. I sort of know something is very wrong based on the reactions of my husband and my friend. He is so worried and overwhelmed by something and he is so level headed and keeps his calm almost ALL the time... but he just blew yesterday. He just kept saying "I don't know what to do!" According to others I'm acting strangely I think... I say I think because I don't know what it is I'm doing. Honest to God, everything seems normal to me. I have some kinda intense secretive beliefs going on about my existence and what I do, but I just can't think of them as being harmful to anyone, or why it should be so upsetting that I am enjoying being inspired. I don't see the alone thing being an issue because people are in close proximity to me all the time, at least for a few more months and I should be better by then if I need to be better. I will say I get hysterical a lot lately over small things. I am not "well". But there has never been a point my history that anything has been fully effective in treatment. I can function, but only at a base level (no job, low stress environment). Right now I stop getting hysterical by repeating to myself "this isn't real" or writing that a lot. It helps me calm down, so I see nothing wrong about a coping mechanism. I can't get much out of my husband that I can understand. I am seeing my doctor soon, my psychiatrist, and counsellor. I don't know what I should do though? I'm taking massive seroqel doses so my head is blurry a bit, and that makes it even harder to think or what to do. I sleep normally, but it has never been sleep deprivation that triggered my manic episodes, and I guess they are severe. It feels like someone sneezing 100 miles away can be a trigger for my episodes, they are so sensitive to EVERYTHING. Anyway, Is the whole definition of crazy dependant on a person not thinking or believing themselves to be so? Should I be in a hospital? I'm only a danger when I'm alone, I've come to realise this for now. But when my husband is here I feel okay. Maybe it's unfair to ask this much of everyone around me 24/7... I'm rambling... just help me understand some things if you can. Someone? Thanks in advance. I'm very confused
  7. Hi there, I'm new to this website and I just had a relapse for the first time in a month. I have a bit of a story to go with it, so bear with me for a few lines? I went to a mental hospital for ten days at the beginning of March, and when I got out, they put me on Prozac and right into counselling. Well, I figured out in my session yesterday that I had been sexually abused not once, but twice in my childhood by two different parties. Needless to say, I have been dwelling on it and I'm very, very affected by this. I haven't cut since I went into the hospital (having gone there with cuts that could have warranted stitches), but I relapsed tonight just thinking about what I had figured out yesterday. I've been a compulsive cutter for three years, and hardly ever stopped. I just... I really need some help. What do I do? How do I deal with a relapse? How do I make sure I can stop myself this time, or the next time it happens? I've hardly ever gone more than a couple weeks without self-harm in some fashion, as far as I can truly remember. I don't know how to stop myself without going back to the hospital. I would really like some help. I would be very relieved to receive some. Thank you.
  8. Ok so I took my first 75mg dose of venlafaxine yesterday after being on 37.5mg for a week. I took it at 6:30 pm, went to bed at 10:00 pm and woke up at 12:42 am and couldn't go back to sleep. I started to feel a little euphoric but decided to try to get more sleep and laid down for 20 min. Now my aweful depression thoughts are back but I still feel full of energy and a little irritable. My speech and thoughts are goin a mile a min. To put it simply I'm having a mixed episode. Here's the problem, I called my pdoc's office and he's out of town and the person covering for him is swamped. They said they would try to get back to me later today and suggested I should go back down to the lower dose if I don't hear anything. I can't go back down to that dose, I only have 75mg capsules. Plus I've been through this before and I know I just need a large dose of AP to fix this. Should I go to the ER if they don't call me back? I don't know how long I can handle this.
  9. Sorry to interupt anything, but I don't know where else to turn. I need advise and I need it FAST! Let me give you the rundown: Disorders: Schizoaffective (bipolar type 1 mixed); Panic Disorder; ADD; Severe Social Phobia; Acute Anxiety; Severe Agoraphobia; Severe depression Now); Chronic Pain Disorder; severe obstructive sleep apnea; severe EDS/Narcolepsy; late stage hypothyroidism; high blood pressure...and more I'm sure... Meds currently on (some for decades): Geodon 80 mgs daily; Prozac 80 mgs daily; Clonazepam 6 mgs daily; Neurontin 1200 mgs daily; Adderall 60 mgs daily; Oxycontin 80 mgs daily; Oxycodone 45 mgs daily; Baclofet 75 mgs daily; Lisinopril 25 mgs daily (blood pressure); Synthroid 75 mcgs daily; and some misc.; antibiotics, etc. Income: Was a writer/designer for about 25 years, applied for disability in 2006 and was turned down but in appeal (as of today, it's still in appeal for back pay). Attorney advised to apply a second time and was given immediately last year, and considered 'lifelong' chronic disorders, but only $1,000 per month. I also took Indiana Medicaid and Food Stamps. Story 1: I have had no luck with shrinks in a couple years and fired my last one about a year ago. My doctor has been keeping me up on my meds including pain specialist, sleep disorder specialist. But for a year now, I have been trying to find a competent shrink that takes medicaid...but have had no luck. Last two shrinks I saw...one in May 2011, and one in Oct. 2011, both said my conditions were 'too acute' and didn't have the resources etc. to treat me. They also said (and I agree from experience) that my conditions are too acute for places like behavioral clinics and stress centers (been to both several times). And they weren't the first to say maybe the only option left is ECT because I have tried every (or most) anti-psychotics and anti-depressants, and mood stabilizers with no luck. I only had some luck with Geodon (which I take now), but I've gained about 50 pds and the paranoia and phobias are still strong. Abilify helped some, but gained weight, was maxed out and they took me off it. No luck with anti-depressants. Part 2: Because I had lost all hope for disability long ago, when I finally got it last year, I was in such bad shape (I was hospitalized 3 times in 5 months before and after I began getting it. Indiana medicaid sent me a letter a couple weeks ago saying I should have reported that income. Stupid me!! I figured...disability, both federal/state run; knew situation, etc. I thought it would automatically be known by state government, but I guess not. So, they immediately, without warning, cut my food stamps from $200 per month to $50 per month, and the biggie; they cut my medicaid and gave me a spend down of $300 per month before they provide anything. I immediately appealed it, but nothing has been set yet. The Problem and hope for advise: About 8 months ago, I was pretty much homeless, but came across a so-called 'friend' I knew since grade school. Known her over 35 years. She was informed of the situation, and gave me an offer I couldn't refuse..I had no other choice. (Keep in mind, we are just friends, not lovers or anything like that). After a couple months of talking, she made an offer of: I move to Lebanon, In close to her and she would be my provider until I could get the mental and physical help I needed and was stable...including help cleaning, finances, pay my bills, laundry etc. (I can no longer do daily tasks), and all I would have to do is find and establish a rapport with a shrink, therapist, doctors etc. I warned her it might take several months in my condition, she said 'quit worrying about it'...so I put my trust in her. She took everything I made including food stamps and medicaid covering everything except a $36 monthly copay for meds and found an apartment, got me set up etc. and budgeted everything so I would end up with about $150 to $200 per month left over (on good months), but after about 2 weeks of me getting in the apartment she bailed on me and won't have anything to do with me. And with my disorders, I can't do it all myself. I have also had two unsuccessful back surgeries and my pain specialist wants me to see another specialist for a third surgery. I can't do it. (Don't forget I have extreme agoraphobia; social and socio phobia (fear of public places as well as people in general). So I rarely go outside unless I have to. But with these cuts medicaid did to me, instead of just $36 per month for meds, I have to pay everything until the first $300 is paid. I DON'T have it! Like I said, I barely have $150 to $200 left per month and much of that is for emergencies like: higher utility bills depending on season etc., other meds; food that the $200 per month food stamps wouldn't take care of (yes, it's next to impossible to live off of $50 for a 7 day week of groceries, especially when you can't make it to the grocery store and you just live off frozen overpriced shit from the 24 hour CVS pharmacy across the street). So with this new spend down and cut in food stamps, I figured at minimum, I would end up at least $75+ in the hole every month. I can't afford two of my meds let alone 13! I live very cheaply. I don't have a phone, I don't have cable TV, no entertainment except the computer (which is my only way of contact with society). I have exactly 30 days of meds left, still no shrink, I've tried every resource I can come up with and I'm at a dead end. I still need part time live in help...I go a month+ without a shower or brushing; I have no clothes; I don't have a washer or dryer; I don't even have broom or vacuum cleaner...shit, I don't even have a bed...I sleep on the couch. I am waiting for replies from my last two possible resources. A social worker/case manager, and because of everything else, I going to try to find a psychologist I can talk to and maybe he can pull some strings. Does anyone have any suggestions? Is it possible to go to another country as a visitor and get proper medical treatment without losing my disability? Is there a law or exception for people like me to get this spend-down reversed? ANYTHING!!!???? I'm so sorry to take up your time, but I just have absolutely nowhere else to turn and I'm afraid I'm just going to end up being another statistic in a very short amount of time. A mentally ill nobody living on the street. I won't last two months. I am not street wise. I was decades ago, but not anymore. Again, I'm so sorry to bother you, I just don't know what else to do. Any suggestions would help and I thank you in advance...sincerely. Steve
  • Create New...