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Showing results for tags 'losing my mind'.
I have been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, Sever Anxiety/Panic Disorder, Slight OCD, and Mood Disorder. I also have trouble sleeping, and when these sleep cycles hit where I cannot sleep I wind up with major Panic Attacks. They have tried all kinds of medicine, but I am currently on Celexa 40mg, XanaX 2 X 2mg a day as needed, Lithium, Seraquil, Propranolol (low blood pressure med, so I don;t have a heart attack from panic attack in my sleep)... I have been under a lot of work pressure and in fact it was a blessing I got fired today for doing what was right (long story) But I was very releaved. I am having major financial stress and worry about paying for medication and my high risk health pool rates. My Mom helps me pay for these. I feel bad b/c she is retirement age and struggling....but I have no other options. My spouse ignores me and is not affectionate to me b/c I am no longer the strong person (mentally) that I use to be. Also I had gotten laid off from a really great job where I made great money. My job along with 11,000 where moved overseas. SO I am blamed for all of our financial problems. My mom and spouse do not understand what it is like haveing these mental conditions. And b/c of that I get no support, and I have no support from any friends. I feel so alone in this world. Recently the panic attacks have really gotten bad. I don't freak out mentally, at least on the outside. I keep feeling that I am about to die. And the worst one is I feel that I am absolutely going totally insane. It is completely wearing me down. On top of the feelings I get various physical symptoms. It almost feels like the panic attack is on going and never really stops. I get some relef from it... the Xanax really helps for 4 hours, but I really need to be prescribed 3 a day... my doctor doesn't want to do that. I feel terrified most of the time. I also feel that I am in unreality. This is horrible to live like this.... and sometime when I get the feeling I am going to die, I just wish I would.... I cannot take it.... Is there anything at all I can do to get some relief from these panic attacks? Can panic attacks just perpetually go on like this...??? Also a lot of the time I get freezing cold feet when this is all happening... I am so desperate... any advice would help.... I just know I cannot go on like this... It is completely wearing me down.... A lot of time the Panic Attacks also have bad episodes of depression with them.... I just feel all alone in this world... If anybody can give me some suggestions... I would appreciate it more than I could ever express....