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Ok, so life sucks sometimes. It happens. Some days your riding high and others you wonder about your purpose. Recently, I've been going through this phase of wondering just what the hell I'm doing here. What is my purpose? I used to love my job. I didn't even mind that my boss was a micromanaging, controlling, deceitful, narcissistic dick. Water off a duck's back. Lately, however, it's been getting to me. Seems as though the aforementioned prick has decided my job can be done better. 10 years and I've never made a mistake with the equipment I handle while this a-hole FUBAR's it in some way almost every time and somehow manages to place the blame on others when called out on it. I get tired of not being told the score, of things changing in the middle, of the deception and lies. I get tired of there being only 1 way (a-hole's) of doing something or having the process made 3 times harder than it needs to be. I'm at the point of should I stay or should I go now? Thoughts? -grimmie knows
Dental Issues Anybody?
Go Ask Alice posted a topic in I've *Still* Got Issues!Hi CB- I was wondering how many of us suffer from any dental issues? Personally, ever since I was a small child, I was incredibly negligent with my physical hygeine, and I have no idea why. It continued into my teenage and young adult years (which is where I am at currently). I really don't know what caused it, but my parents were fairly negligent, but I feel like it has more to do with my mental issues. They were a slew of different issues as a child compared to what they eventually developed into, but the underlying idea is the same. I feel like I can't take care of all "realms" of my life. My parents influenced school, that was the realm I held in the highest esteem. My friends were my second. Needless to say, when it came to eating, bathing, cleaning, I was useless. And for a while, that didn't cause my problems (luckily I don't smell even after a shocking period of time without showering). But eventually, it caught up with my teeth. BADLY. But, as I have a dental phobia, and severely aversive to conflict, especially with my narcissistic father, I put it on the backburner. To the point where chunks of my teeth were falling out. Luckily, mostly the back molars, so I still kept my mouth shut and bore the pain. And then it got one of my canines. Completely. Now, I will say that I am fortunate to come from a fairly wealthy family who can afford treatment for such procedures, but not without intense beratement, leading to feelings of failure, inadequacy, and most importantly, a sense that I am unable to function within this world independently. So, I finally went to get my canine inspected. It was too far gone and had to be pulled, not to mention countless cavaties elsewhere. And, so I wouldn't have a hole in the front of my mouth, my dentist and I decided an implant would be best (due to my age, bridges may be impractical, as it requires destroying the surrounding teeth). At this appointment though, they mentioned my wisdom teeth were all about to erupt. And they were, it wasn't a scam. I've been feeling it for years. One of them is growing horizonally out of the back of my gums to the point where it scrapes my inner mouth, but I was too afraid to face my narcisstic father (and the dentist, but not as much). To my dad, money is All. When he texts, he can't even say the word, its just "$$$$$$$!!!!!!" And not just that, but two of my back molars, the ones with missing chunks, had such little teeth left they could do nothing but pull them. And due to concerns of being 24 and not having those two back molars to properly eat, we decided implants would be best there, too. But I sat on this information for half a year. Until every single second of my existence had been taken over by excruciating pain which I had tried every home remedy in the book to fix. Orajel, salt water, advil, tylenol, ibuprofen, motrin, midol, garlic & pepper water mix, hydrogen peroxide. They all helped, for a while, until they didn't anymore. I had no choice. I had to make the appointment. Not to mention it was a terrifying thought to have 7 teeth removed, my dad didn't care about how much pain I tolerated for so long, about why my teeth may be this way. In fact, he kept insisting they were lying about all of this in an attempt to "rob him" (not paranoia, just born in the '40''s). But I had to do it. I couldn't live like that anymore. So here I sit, writing, feeling incredibly inadequate, bleeding porfusely from the gaping holes in my gums, feeling terrible. Was my dad right? Is this just me overexaggerating? It really can't be, but he has this way about him where he knows exactly which buttons to push and how hard. So now, in pain, I feel like I'm completely incapable of supporting myself in this world, or even taking care of myself, or at the very least a sucker who got her father robbed (again, but that's a different story). I see I have run away with my point here, but my question still stands: Has your mental illness ever caused severe dental issues? It makes me feel terrible when the "normal" people don't have nearly the amount of dental work or problems I do, and to be frank, it makes me feel like shit. So CB, tell me what you think. --Alice