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Hi everyone. Feel free to skip to the bottom if this is too long! I found this board after endlessing searching the internet for help. Almost I year ago I had a serious of panic attacks that sent to me to the ER twice, and the walk in once. First time in my life having them. I ended up getting celexa and Klonopin from my PDoc. I felt fine after a couple of weeks until I could stop my tongue from twitching, and couldn't pronounce certain words. (not that I was ever going to work as a voice over actor ) My PDoc told me the systems would go away in a few weeks. I also went to an APRN who specializes in Pschyc meds. After seeing the tongue issue, she called her partner in, who had been doing this type of work for almost 40 years. He said, "Yup Mandibular Dystonia(?). In another two weeks that will be permanant." They pulled me off the Celexa immedialtely, using prozac for one week wean down. I also bumped up the Klonopin. Fast forward to a last month, amd I was diagnosed with ADHD. Know to go hand and hand with Anxiety disorder, this was no big surprise. My APRN (I kicked me PDoc to the curb) perscribed me Focalin. After two weeks on the Focalin I felt so good, I cut out my mid day .25mg klonopin, but kept the morning and nightime 1mg. I felt even better after the slight withdrawal went away. I asked to be switched to Focalin XR, so I would only need to take one dose a day. After one day on the XR, I had a panic attack, and had to take an extra dose (.25mg) of Klonopin to stop it. Since then, I've gone back to the original Focalin twice a day, and still take the morning 1mg and night time 1mg of Klonopin. Problem is, my anxiety level is really bad. TLDR: Is my body in total chaos due to the change in meds over a short period, or should I have just stayed with the 2.25mg of Klonopin since it worked like a charm? I'm thinking of starting back to that again today.

High, I'm knew hear. I stopped mental health treatment a year and a half ago because my doctor said I... "Just need to grow up." I'm 30-something. I haven't left the house in 6 months. I've dated sharp objects for the past 26 years. I had a serious suicide attempt in January. The only reason I'm alive is because the kindness of a stranger. Saying I need to 'just grow up' is a grandiose ideation, methinks. So, I'm here to see if I can sort myself out a bit and meet people like myself. I worked in the mental health field for all of my life (before I stopped leaving the house), my ex-husband is severely bi-polar (I've lived through 40+ hospitalizations with him), and my son is PDD-NOS, so I hope that I can help others while I'm here too.

I'm new. I'm not new to bipolar, but it keeps me on my toes. I have trouble sleeping when I should, at night, and I'm trying to work out new meds with my psychiatrist to help me sleep. I drank too much until recently (8 mos.) and now I'm working to drink only infrequently. I'm having more success than I've had in the last eleven years. I chew tobacco and am working on quitting. It'll be the patch for me. I've tried cold turkey, and it's no fun and I can't do it. I start a lot of sentences with "I" when I'm having to write but am not at my best. Sorry. Make my sentences more interesting I will, hmm?! After getting a decent start on college, I decided to major in astronomy/astrophysics.Then chemical engineering. Bam. Hospital after a year of treatment. Back to school. Tried to run 25 miles in the middle of the night without shoes on. Zot. Hospital again. Attacked by a psychopath with a knife. Slice. Hospital. The evil bastard is out there somewhere if he isn't already dead. Computers seemed to be a practical path so when I went back to school I chose that. I hate computers I only know one other person who is bipolar -- that I know of. I don't know what to expect from this board, but I've never had a friend to discuss this with, although I've told a few a little about what I've been through. I'm fascinated by the phenomenology (why not use the biggest word I can think of?) of psychosis, as I've been dxed with bipolar with psychotic features (very fun and exciting sometimes). Long story short, I did not pass muster with the secret-agent people. I was disappointed. Telling the difference between MI-induced changes in personality and the natural changes of leaving adolescence and approaching middle age is something I'm having trouble doing. How early was a affected by mental illness? What about me is me and what is bd-altered me? (I'm myself either way, but I still wonder.) I go to see a person on campus weekly. She's great, the kind of person who makes me want to become a therapist (too late for that, but my roommate and wife think I'm being a naysayer -- I wouldn't like it anyway, probably). I hope everyone here has found good help or finds it soon.