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  • Stuff That Makes You Feel Like Crap
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Found 11 results

  1. I've been in therapy for 5 years. Also medicated. I have a good job. I have a supportive husband. I have a home. But years of abuse and insanity still get the better of me sometimes and I feel like I don't deserve anything good, or that people will "find out" that I am a horrible person (I have bad elements and good), and I still have days/weeks. when I am extremely self destructive. The current incarnation is that (a) I am fighting dwindling self consciousnes and social awkwardness, - all part of myregular repertoire - but now (b) for no reason whatsoever I am fighting against the development
  2. I've left high school and my hometown. I came here, and I was happy. But I could still hear my family and my old classmates demeaning me and hating me in my head. My concentration isn't what it used to be, so I've not been my best academically, which is a huge trigger. I've started on my hip now so no one knows. I'm so ashamed
  3. hi everyone, I'm Emily, 28 married 2 kids... Still stuck in this bullshit disease. Miserable most of the time. Definitely isolated and lonely, I feel like I'm the only one struggling even though I'm not. Diagnosed anorexic years ago, got pregnant, second time was a living hell for me! Lots of purging .. Back to restricting postpartum, then crept to binge eating and bulimia, now "ednos". Really wanna break purging. Used to be almost everyday til I had a major health scare a month ago. Now a couple times a week. Wanna make it none but ya know, much easier said then done.
  4. Does anyone else have a similar experience? I have a lot of physical health issues, and I think that they can nearly all be traced back to my GAD. Migraine headaches, muscle pain and spasms, stomach issues, dizziness, general fatigue -- it just feels like a constant onslaught. While the rational part of my brain knows that I am a very healthy person - the only "real" illness I've had in the last few years is a kidney stone this past month, which is just compounding the situation because it's quite painful - I still feel like a very sick and broken person, even though I know my issues are
  5. Hello, I'm new to this. My last incident has led to this website. Two weeks ago, I was pretty drunk, okay..wasted and decided I have had enough with life. I took an entire bottle of ambien and woke up in the hospital the next morning. I do remember taking the pills, but it was the drinking that made me do it. Sober, I cant picture hurting myself. Anyhow, now not only am I ashamed. I have to deal with pity from family who are constantly asking how I am doing. AND the medical bills to come for the ambulance and 3 day hospital stay. I do have insurance but im still going to be facing a
  6. May be Triggering for some - not not explicit. Hi All, I've been cutting since I was 12, was diagnosed with Bipolar II when I was 15; which seems to explain why - I've never really figured it out myself. I've had long periods of recovery, and I really thought I had it cracked this time. I was wrong. Last night I relapsed. I'm going to keep working on getting better, and not let this get me down or put me off finding healthier solutions, the usual spiel, but in the meantime I have to deal with the fallout, and I think I need some support with that. My family knows about m
  7. I've been having the physical sensations of a panic attack for two days. My chest is starting to ache as my heart won't stop racing.. My hands shake, I can't take a deep breath. All this because of shame. I am consumed by shame and self hatred (due to recent behavior) and all the self soothing skills I'm trying are barely taking the edge off. I'm 28 and have borderline personality, and am in therapy. My therapy goal now is to get me back to work after two years dedicated to getting a handle on my MI. Frankly, the idea of going to work absolutely paralyzes me with fear. Two nights ago, the wa
  8. So, my self injury. My fiance found out about it not that long ago... he was upset, to say the least, and only now am I able to explain - I feel the need to punish myself. If I make a social mistake (problems interpreting social cues), or if I let someone down, or if I upset him (which is cyclical of course). I feel guilty, and I get recurring thoughts about how horrible and worthless I am, and I can't stop focusing on my mistake until I am punished... Does anyone else feel like this? Like they MUST punish themselves? I've promised him I won't do it anymore and that's helped me a
  9. NOTE: May trigger I've been self harming in one form or another since I was 7. At 19 while pregnant, I started a disturbing trend of self hitting to the face and head. This was not a behavior that stopped upon delivery, which is one of the reasons I saught psychiatric care as an adult. I've not engaged in this mal-adaptive coping behavior in a few months, which I am very proud of myself for. My question is, has anyone else here ever engaged in this form of self harm?
  10. I've been lurking on this board for a couple months now and decided to post. Hopefully it'll be therapeutic? I was wondering if anyone else feels guilty for having to resort to cutting? I often feel bad for wanting to cut myself so badly, because I don't feel like I have a good excuse to be a cutter. I don't have a damaged past to blame my problems on, and my life isn't that bad now. I mean I have a good, well respected career, a loving family, an education, good friends and I'm healthy. At times it feels like been very blessed. I have a good life, yet I actively try to destroy it wit
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