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I’m caught up between my boyfriend and my ex. I spent the night with my ex the other night due to some family issues and I just needed out of the house. My ex is caught up into some bad stuff. Drugs, selling, drinking, smoking weed. There’s never really a time he’s TRULY sober. When I spent the night my boyfriend didn’t want us sharing the bed, but we did. His excuse was I don’t want another man in bed with my girlfriend yet his friend laid on the bed when he left so we could watch OITNB together. My ex cuddled me that night, and started to get me in the mood by rubbing my legs….it felt so amazing but I didn’t give in. I even had him meet my boyfriend before that night so he’d know who I was staying the night with. I fantasized about my ex, I still do, I just wanted his hands and lips all over my body…..but he screwed me over in the past when he left me for his ex. Last night, I got into it with my boyfriend. I put everything on the table. He knows I still like my ex and redeveloped feelings for him. I didn’t plan to, no one plans these things. My boyfriend is very shy and reserved. And totally not confrontational, so that’s something that doesn’t make me feel safe….what if something were to happen and I needed him to defend me? He’s so sweet and god to me. He reminds me how beautiful I am. He helps me with my family issues and my anxiety and depression. Etc. Last night when I was upset and crying I was at a friends house, and he was going to walk there when I was upset in the wee hours of the morning so I’d feel better. I wanted him or my ex. No one else… I see my boyfriend and I having a life together, kids, etc. He works, he doesn’t do drugs anymore, and he’s an overall good guy. I got mad at him for not ever getting mad at me for one, last night. Because of what happened with my ex and I. He said it’s because he trusts me, which is great but he can still get mad….I didn’t do anything with my ex. Believe me, I wanted to. But I held off….right now my ex and I are kind of mad at each other, again. We do this every time. We fight, forgive each other and are fine again. And it’s over and over….My BPD makes me attach to people easily, so when one person isn’t giving me attention and someone else is, there I go getting attached. My boyfriend’s roommate won’t let me see him at their place anymore, he’s working when I’m not. Or I’m in school when he’s not working. One of us is in the mood when the other isn’t. He’s the first and only guy I’ve slept with and my first real adult relationship. I’m his first girlfriend since he is so quiet and reserved too./….I don’t wanna give my boyfriend up because I’m pretty sure guys like him are dime a dozen and I don’t think I could find that again. I’m totally comfortable around him too. I’m semi comfortable with my ex since we didn’t last as long….this is also the longest relationship I’ve had. Coming up to a year… What should I do…? I feel like I’m hurting him…
Hello All! I am a 19 year old Bipolar II with two younger brothers. One is 18, with likely, if undiagnosed, Autistic Spectrum Disorder/Aspergers Syndrome. My youngest brother is 13, and for many years, on and off, he has developed a compulsive blink. He squeezes his eyes shut hard, and more often than necessary. Most of the time, he doesn't notice he's doing it, but as he's aged, he's mentioned how annoying/uncomfortable it is. At first my mother used to tell him off, but I read a bit about Transient Tics, I realised it wasn't his fault, and convinced her just not to mention it. However it still appears sporadically. It always goes away after a little while, but recently I've noticed a pattern; he seems to do it more when I (who have now been away at University for over a year), come home, and he feels some - I assume stress - at conversing with me, when he hasn't in a while. Now my father, who is a very infrequent presence in our lives, is visiting, and he's started ticing (ticking?) again. My mother seems to think it gets worse when he is tired, I haven't noticed this, but thought I should mention it. I'm not too worried about it, but I would like to know if anyone has any information; about how to help him stop (since it bothers him), or what to expect if it gets worse? Can it be a precursor to anything? And is it indicative of anything? Is he more stressed than we think? A little bit on him as a person; he's very funny, and constantly cracking jokes, etc… He exudes confidence, but is actually very nervous in front of new people. He doesn't have many friends - he's been to school for a number of years, but he's been home-schooled for the last two years. Essentially, I am worried there is something going on in his little head, that he is not expressing, and this is presenting itself as a tic. Thank you for all of your help; Lily.