Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

Recommended Posts


I am very aware that it's not ok to pause for a long time after someone asks you a question, or when it's your turn to speak. So i blurt something out. If it's a question, here is the worst part, I often lie. I can't remember the real answer so i make up a lie because I can make up a story faster than i can remember a real story, separate what's private from what's not, and then try to tell it in an interesting way. 

What did you do this weekend?
I WENT FOR A WALK IN THE PARK 

What did you do at lunch breaks when you were in school? 
*makes up a story that sounds plausible* 

I was trying to figure out why i lie so much recently, and I realised this is the reason a lot of the time. i don't want to bore people while they wait for me to remember the answer to a question they don't even care that much about anyway 

solutions? Ideas? tips? can you relate? 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do you ever listen to talk radio? Dead air is one of the worst things that can happen to them. So they often talk around a subject and verbalise their working out of an answer. 

 

But FWIW, I am OK with people pausing. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Could you stall by saying things like “that’s a good question,” or ‘“hmmm, I’m not sure I remember...”? Often this is how I work something out. I think I pause too but if someone asks me a question that I need a bit of time to answer, I often say something vague at first when I’m formulating how best to answer.

I also make sure to say “I don’t know” to things I don’t know. It’s better to just admit you don’t know the answer to a question, even if it’s boring to do so. 

Edited by saintalto
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I definitely can not process my thoughts into speech fast enough for a lot of conversations.  However, sometimes, especially when it's about some things, I will talk and talk really fast and that can be really annoying.  When it's dead air time, I've never been aware that pauses were a social faux paus.  That's not to say they aren't, I just never considered it.  I don't know any really good compensatory strategies.  I do a lot of "um" "hm" "I don't know".  I am interested now in other things to do.

Edited by Banana Smurf
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

"I don't know" or "I don't recall" are perfectly good answers. "Let me get back to you on that" if you need more time to formulate an answer. I use these after seizures when my memory is spotty.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think it's OK to pause. My father would routinely take 10-30 seconds or more to answer even a simple question, thinking in silence until he had an answer. As far as I know everyone just got used to it - friends, family, and coworkers.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

i will try to pause more, i think it would be good for me, slow down, think more. 

also you are totally right DogMan, i am acting like i'm on the radio, i'm not

maybe the problem is i watch youtube more than i talk to people, maybe the problem is all the jump cuts! I've gotten used to the idea that you don't pause you just talk talk talk

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...