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BF asked me if maybe I should get assessed for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome but I know a fair bit about CFS and I know that's not what's up, it's not that type of tired. It's the ADHD exhaustion, I hear a lot of ADHD people talk about it. Exhaustion isn't the right word, it's just always being burned out, despite working part time and having more free time than most. It's not tired as in "I need to sleep" although I could fall asleep at any time of day if you put me in a dark room, I could sleep all day if I didn't have an alarm, but the feeling is a bit different. Burned out is the best way to express it I think, except it doesn't take much to burn me out. 

Well after about 5 months of lockdown I've gotten really used to not being burned out and I'm dreading going back to it. Any ideas how to cope with this lack of energy? I know reducing stress and saying "no" to unnecessary projects or extra hours is really important, anything else? 

Also I know lockdown didn't have this affect for a lot of people, that it full on sucked for a lot of people and made everything worse, and I want to say I hear you :( It just really suited my mental health, personally, and that doesn't take away from how shitty it was for lots of other people. Getting up a bit later, not commuting, not having to talk to people and put on the mask all the time, just left me with so much more energy to feel "normal" or what I imagine it must be like to feel normal 

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Yes, yes, and YES. I have this tiredness/fatigue ever single day. I've had it for years. But, I too know for sure that it's not CFS ( though, I have almost considered that it could be). However, like you said it's not that type of tiredness that most people typically feel. And It's not as if I'm sleepy all the time either. It's just this constant lack of energy. I did start taking Strattera, starting from last week, and the tiredness side effect could be contributing to it also at the moment. Nonetheless, I validate how you feel. I know exactly what you mean.

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CeremonyNewOrder, interesting! Hmmm.... I looked it up, apparently there is one sleep clinic in my whole country, I bet that means it's expensive, it's a private hospital as well, one of our only private hospitals. Sleep studies aren't really a thing here it seems! 

 people don't get checkups either, a doctor would be so confused if you went to them and said you weren't sick and just wanted a checkup, the health system is very different here. Higher life expectancy though so it can't be doing that much harm, i mean the life expectancy could be because of something completely unrelated to the health system but it still means that the health system isn't counteracting health too badly. I might well have sleep apnea, but it doesn't seem like that type of tiredness. It feels very different to how I feel if I didn't get what I consider a good nights sleep or I only slept a few hours. Hmmmm.. So in order to get a referral to a sleep clinic  I'd need to go to a regular doctor first.. I might do that after the pandemic, plus a regular doc could say whether she thought I needed a sleep study or just a pdoc referral



Thanks for the validation Oniliscious :) , always good to know I'm not alone. 

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Posted (edited)
On 8/20/2020 at 7:21 PM, Antecedent said:

CeremonyNewOrder, interesting! Hmmm.... I looked it up, apparently there is one sleep clinic in my whole country, I bet that means it's expensive, it's a private hospital as well, one of our only private hospitals. Sleep studies aren't really a thing here it seems! 

 people don't get checkups either, a doctor would be so confused if you went to them and said you weren't sick and just wanted a checkup, the health system is very different here. Higher life expectancy though so it can't be doing that much harm, i mean the life expectancy could be because of something completely unrelated to the health system but it still means that the health system isn't counteracting health too badly. I might well have sleep apnea, but it doesn't seem like that type of tiredness. It feels very different to how I feel if I didn't get what I consider a good nights sleep or I only slept a few hours. Hmmmm.. So in order to get a referral to a sleep clinic  I'd need to go to a regular doctor first.. I might do that after the pandemic, plus a regular doc could say whether she thought I needed a sleep study or just a pdoc referral



Thanks for the validation Oniliscious :) , always good to know I'm not alone. 

@Antecedent I'm getting the same sort of tiredness...It's not like I could actually sleep all day, but I've no energy to do much other than lay around. It is not the type of tiredness you get due to lack of sleep, it's something else.  Like you describe - a "burn out" sort of feeling, yet I don't work or have any obligations that would cause a "burn out" feeling. Any effort makes me drained, even leisurely reading.

I sleep really well every night (10 hours). I do go for walks, but i literally cannot function & no way could i work full time with this. I thought initially that it was Effexor, but it remains after stopping that months ago. I just feel like I'm dragging and 80 years old sometimes.

I've had tests up the wazoo, and they show nothing out of the ordinary. I wanted to maybe try Levothyroxine again, although my TSH/ thyroid is still within the healthy range.

I haven't taken my stimulant in weeks (Ritalin) because I ran out....but I was just as tired when I was taking it!

Edited by Blahblah
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That sounds sooo familiar too @BlahBlah, I can only work part time and this is a big part of the reason why, the burnout (if we call it that) gets unmanageable if I try to work longer hours. I had a colleague with CFS and although our tiredness was completely different and I couldn't relate to his experience (though I could emapthize) the effect was the same, we both worked the same part time hours!

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@CeremonyNewOrder Funny you mentioned that. Just got my blood drawn for those exact tests! Except for the vitamin d test. Had that one done 2 months ago and it did show that I was super lower on it. So now, I'm taking vitamin d3 for it. I definitely think that I have an iron deficiency for sure. Although I should've waited for the tests to come back and for my doc to instruct me otherwise, I took an iron supplement and wow. It made a HUGE difference.

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On 8/24/2020 at 11:05 PM, Oniliscious said:

@CeremonyNewOrder Funny you mentioned that. Just got my blood drawn for those exact tests! Except for the vitamin d test. Had that one done 2 months ago and it did show that I was super lower on it. So now, I'm taking vitamin d3 for it. I definitely think that I have an iron deficiency for sure. Although I should've waited for the tests to come back and for my doc to instruct me otherwise, I took an iron supplement and wow. It made a HUGE difference.

@Oniliscious You must've been quite deficient! I take D3 megadoses all during winter, but didn't notice much difference (my D levels are in range, just on the low end). My multivitamin has Iron in it, and my labs don't show a deficiency. No problem with blood counts either. How long did you take the Iron before you felt a difference? I'd think it wouldn't be immediate for vitamins...

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On 8/24/2020 at 8:21 PM, CeremonyNewOrder said:

If you haven't already, have your doctor do lab work. You might also have a vitamin deficiency or anima or something else. 

I've been like this my whole life is the thing... well, since I started school... so if it didn't come up that one time I got a blood test (regular blood tests aren't a thing here) then it won't come up now I'm guessing. 

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On 8/21/2020 at 3:21 AM, Antecedent said:

Thanks for the validation Oniliscious :) , always good to know I'm not alone. 

You are not alone. I'm the 90th percentile on my Pdoc's scale. That's 30% worse that all the other people that qualify for stimulants (where I am at least). Before hormonal hell hit, I used to run around in circles until it was time to pick up the kids, then continue to run around. Peri-meopause has slowed me down, but not my head (I am a mixture of the two ADHD subtypes). It's SO EXHAUSTING. I also have Autism, so forays out into the world exacerbated the problem. Covid has been a dream for me. I have to keep reminding myself to add, "except for all the deaths, illness, loss of jobs etc". I joke ( I say joke, so that people think I'm joking, because neurotypicals can't handle the truth) that I need a drug induced three month coma. I think I might feel a little better after that. What stimulants do you take?

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6 hours ago, Blahblah said:

I'd think it wouldn't be immediate for vitamins...

When I was pregnant, and the tests said that I was fine, but the OBGYN said to take iron in the second trimester, I went from barely able to stand, to (overnight, one tablet) feeling great (well, sort of). I couldn't believe it. And it can't be placebo affect, because I had seen the test results, and had no preconceived ideas about it.

 

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Posted (edited)

Oh stimulants! It's a whole thing, KJ :(

So to get assessed for ADHD here I need my records from elementary school. I contacted my elementary school and all the records were destroyed in order comply with GDPR (they wouldn't have had to destroy them if they could find all the people and get permission, but track down 50 years worth of people, decades after they'd left the school?). So at the moment, unless they change the process, that's it!.

I can get a private assessment, I met someone who did that, all they were able to say to her was "we can say with 100% confidence that if we had your school records we could give you an ADHD diagnosis". I was unsure whether to pay for that sort of validation. I just know I have this, I can spot other ADHD people and I know they can spot me too by how they act towards me, how we are on the same wavelength, but they might not call it ADHD because it's not a popular diagnosis here. I can really relate to other ND people in a lot of ways too, but ADHD is the one where I tick all the boxes, and I've read books about it, both popular ones and university textbooks, I'm really confident I have it, and I've read about a whole bunch of "disorders" (mental health has been my fixation for a few years, before that it was languages, before that it was art, before that it was music, before that it was animals) so it's not like this is the first one I learned about and so I got "med student syndrome" where you can relate a little bit to everything so you think you have everything.


I know self-dx is frowned upon in places where there isn't so much gatekeeping, but it's a very different culture here. You can imagine, even physical health is not very medicalized, so imagine what mental health is like! So I figure, a diagnosis is just a pdoc saying "other people who have the same list of difficulties found benefit from X, Y and Z, so we'll try X, Y and Z with you" and so in that sense I feel it's ok to get help from the community, checking first of course that I am asking about something that is recognised as part of ADHD and not just some other thing I might have for some other reason. 

You probably already know about Autistic burnout but just in case you don't or someone else might be reading this and needs to see it: 

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Edited by Antecedent
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23 hours ago, Blahblah said:

@Oniliscious You must've been quite deficient! I take D3 megadoses all during winter, but didn't notice much difference (my D levels are in range, just on the low end). My multivitamin has Iron in it, and my labs don't show a deficiency. No problem with blood counts either. How long did you take the Iron before you felt a difference? I'd think it wouldn't be immediate

The first day that I took my Iron pill, I felt an immediate difference after 30 minutes. I was like, whoa! 

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8 hours ago, Antecedent said:

I just know I have this, I can spot other ADHD people and I know they can spot me too by how they act towards me, how we are on the same wavelength,

Oh, Antecedent. What a shitshow. It's been quite a few years since my family and I got our diagnoses, so I have done a lot of research, and diagnose people at random (I don't usually tell them, because I found that people don't like that, lol ). That is insane that you can't get a diagnosis because of your age. We can here, but because I was diagnosed as an adult, the long acting stimulants are not covered by government assistance (Seriously???), so it's $60 a bottle or stay on the immediate release. This applies to some other drugs also. Don't get me started. Fortunately my children were diagnosed reasonably early, so they can get the long acting versions. I had a really big day yesterday, so today I'm just limping along, like your picture (can I please take a large amount of downers and go hide under a blanket for the day? Answer: No, because I don't fit into the government's box of acceptable dosages). You said that you read university textbooks. That's pretty full on, would you say that you are primarily on the Hyperactive side of ADHD? I am a mix of both subtypes (the most common diagnosis), and even on stimulants, I find it hard to focus on more than one sentence (the only thing that has ever really worked for my ADHD was vortioxetine. Was going to finally go and do a science degree, then realised that I hadn't left the house for three months. So. That was it. Was nice to see what real life was like, for a short time. But also, now I REALLY know what I am missing out on ). You have my full empathy. Feel free to contact me if you want to vent. Hang in there.

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In school i definitely would have been more on the inattentive side than the hyperactive side, but I think that was because I was just so sensitive to /terrified of being annoying to adults. When I'm on  my own I beep and boop and sing and make a lot of noise and stand up and walk around and spin around, but that was kind of talked out of me, my parents always said i was talkative like it was a bad thing, and even though they are really kind people i was so hypersensitive to that and tried not to be so talkative, I was a complete chatterbox... but yeah for whatever reason i'd say I'm definitely inattentive type now.. though I can be extremely impulsive at times all right. It's like, I'm usually not, but when I am it's so impossible to control. I remember I got it into my head I wanted a tablet and i couldn't wait to get it, i couldn't take the time to research the thing, i had to have it, had to click order immediately, and then when i was waiting for it to arrive i was so irritable... and that does not suit my overall personality, I'm so not into shopping and stuff, and I remember wanting to play with other people's toys so much that I ended up accidentally breaking them while trying to pull them off them, when i was much too old to act like that, even though i didn't mean to do it and i definitely wasn't trying to bully i just HAD to have the toy, it was all i could think about. I say I'm inattentive because the few hyperactive boxes I tick aren't all the time, whereas the inattentive stuff is a daily nightmare 

You are a star KJ thank you so much for your empathy, I'm so glad your kids have their dx and won't have the same obstacles as we had

Gosh it would be interesting to try meds, to try to feel "normal". I imagine learning to drive. That would be a dream come true, to know I could trust my mind enough to let it be in charge of a car. 

 

Edited by Antecedent
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Antecedent, did we grow up in the same household?, lol. I had very nice, but strict parents, that would tell me to stop swinging my legs when I was sitting down, don't talk out of place, look people in the eye (omg) etc. I was going to quote parts of your first paragraph, then realised I was going to quote nearly the whole thing. Impulsivity and inattentiveness go together. Don't get me started on impulsivity. (actually, you can if you want to, just be prepared for a rant). I have grown a lot since my diagnosis, about 6 years ago. My Allistic kid keeps telling me to be quiet, and SSSHHHHHH, lol.  Also asks me when we are out if I can just act normal for a little while  (Why, yes, of course, I only act like an imbecile for fun, insert massive eye roll.  "You're like a kid, laughing and pointing at everything and touching everything". All true.)   Shopping? Hate it. Online is a dream. But still hate it. 

Driving. I got my licence as soon as I could, because it meant freedom from the oppressive smothering I had at home. Also, being a black and white thinker, I am a rule following safety nerd. On the other side, an insane rebel. Owned a car before I had my licence, lol. When I drive, and it has become much more apparent since I had kids, (yelling, screaming, hitting in the back seat and trying to focus on the roundabout that I am in the middle of) I use hyperfocus. It's really mentally draining, and obviously, the further I have to go, the more it wears me out, but that's how I cope. Also listening to Heavy Metal really loud helps in the really busy places. It drowns out the screaming in my head.

"Normal on meds". I should define that, I meant it only helped with my ADHD, not all the other crazy.

As always, hang in there :) 

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Ha ha ha rule following safety nerd while also being a rebel! That's me.  can't abide unearned authority and question everything I am ever asked or told to do and get annoyed super quick if i see any chance someone is trying to "control" me but at the same time, high visibility vest, bike helmet, lights, face mask, all the hand sanitizer... all that stuff.. because it makes sense! 

i can't hyperfocus when cycling so i don't think i could with driving 

Never got a driving licence but did move out at 18! 

What's impulsivity like for you then?

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Antecedent, first I have to ask, do you have any formal diagnosis at all?

Without rules, there would be anarchy, right?? LOL.

Impulsivity. I have got a lot better over the years (I'm 49) at controlling it. But it still pops up all the time. One time I was driving my 15yr old (AKA Clone) home from Pdoc, and someone in front of us cut someone else off (most likely a tourist that didn't know where they were going). This was very rude, and an assault to my beliefs, lol., so I YELLED "Let them go YOU FKN R$T&RD*D C*NT". I sat there fuming for a minute, then looked over at my daughter (who I had forgotten was in the car), and she had an odd look on her face (I'm a raging Aspie, not great at discerning face pictures). I asked her what was up, and she asked me what she had done wrong, she thought that I was calling her that. I should probably add that road rage came with menopause and sodium valproate.  When I'm forced out to go shopping, I usually see things I've never seen before (because I hardly ever go out), and get very excited, and have to touch everything, buy all the stuff I don't need, it's like I'm on some sort of high (not bi-polar). I interrupt people speaking ALL THE TIME. I know it's rude, but I have to say it before I forget it. I derail conversations. Internet shopping got a bit out of hand last year. A bit is an understatement. I've got it together again. I just decided that I could no longer bear the lump of menopausal fat on my stomach, so on the computer, booked in to the first surgeon, getting in at the first appointment for surgery. Asked to be put on the waiting list in case I can get it done NOW. I jump up and down and clap my hands when something makes me happy, before I remember that I'm an adult and that behaviour is frowned upon (why is that? Shouldn't we be allowed to express happiness?). One morning I woke up and decided that I needed a new hobby. So I got on the net and ordered a $300 skateboard. I can't actually ride. I'm also very clumsy, so this was a very bad idea. Footnote; I have and wear all the safety gear, lol. I could go on and on and on. Basically your garden variety of do before you think.

4 hours ago, Antecedent said:

 can't abide unearned authority and question everything I am ever asked or told to do and get annoyed super quick if i see any chance someone is trying to "control" me

I have this also. I see all people as equal, until proven otherwise. A badge or a white coat means nothing to me. What are you like as a person?

Well done for moving out at 18. I did too. Floundered for quite a while (a decade or two).

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