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inner child work


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anyone doing inner child work, or has done it in the past?

i've felt like an adult since as far back as i can remember. there was a lot of pressure on me to be mature, smart and serious, and to take care of my sister. i didn't get a lot of time to be childish and just play, since a lot of my play time also involved looking after my sister and keeping her happy. so it was work too.

tdoc and i have done inner child stuff on and off for the last year or so (or, at least, we've identified that it's an area that definitely needs attention) and we're beginning to lean a bit heavier into it. it's painful work. we were doing EMDR last appointment and i suddenly just got an image in my head of me at five years old or so, and for some reason that image just ruined me. i don't know why.

for the last week or so, i've had an image in my head of current, adult-me carrying a sleeping child-me, as one would carry a kid to bed after falling asleep in the car ride home. i didn't expect drawing that image to be so upsetting. it took a couple tries and i'm still not quite happy with it, but it feels important that i've managed to draw it. i think i'll show it to tdoc, though that scares me.

anyway. if you have any experience or thoughts about inner child work in therapy, please share. i'd love to be able to talk to someone who's done some of this. it's not fun work, that's for sure.

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I haven't done inner child work.  It seems interesting.  I know that my childhood for the most part was good.  There were some bad bits but for the most part my family kept up with the joneses;  we lived in middle class suburbia in a very peaceful, quiet town.  I did a lot of kid things-  i got to enjoy summer camp, horses, and friends.  I enjoyed a good self-esteem at times in my youth.  I celebrated a Norman Rockwell Christmas.  Just somewhere along the way the dream became broken and my life took a confusing turn.  There are hurt bits but the happy bits outnumbered the hurt bits a lot.  It's when that changed that life became painful and unmanageable.

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  • 3 weeks later...

That's an incredibly powerfulll image echolocation;, it sounds like it is really important for you. Has something really important to impart

One of the therapists i left really wanted to do it, she said my inner child was very angry, but i feel like a big kid in a lot of ways, i feel really integrated with the kid, when i said to partner that she wanted to do inner child work he said "how is that supposed to work when you are a big child?" (he didn't say it in a mean way). I don't know if I'm intergrated in a healthy way or not, maybe i need to separate from the angry kid because my anger is quite uncontrollable at times, and child me is quite sure s/he is more clever than all the adults and adults just won't listen *stamps foot*. That's what my inner child is doing maybe, standing with their arms crossed and stamping their foot and trying to get noticed. but I notice them, but that's not enough because I AM them and I want to get noticed and listened to! And ironically i left that therapist because she wasn't listening, maybe if i had let her talk to the inner child she'd have realized and been a better therapist.

How do i mind that kid? tell them I'M LISTENING as many times as I can, and prove it to them, I guess.

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