Is it possible to achieve a manic state that is also functional?

[braindeadbedhead]

This is a long shot, but I figure I can't be the only one who has ever had this thought. Is there a way to induce a state that includes the productivity/happiness of mania - without all the extra bullshit? 😅

Mania is better than any drug, the euphoria is incomparable. Every time I skip a few days of sleep, feel an increase in energy, or anything that might be the beginning of an episode, I think - ''Please let this be the onset of the best feeling in the world. I can't do this shit anymore''. I feel so guilty admitting to that, because I know that being manic and being functional are generally not compatible. I also don't ever want to end up in hospital again, because that never fails to be a de-humanizing experience.

I have not had any symptoms of mania since my last hospital admission, three whole years ago. It was the first and only manic episode that I've ever had, and it lasted for about three months. I feel like I could have avoided hospital completely if I had experienced mania without the accompanying psychosis. If I could just achieve that level of elation without:

• rapid speech
• word-salad
• delusional beliefs
• dangerously impulsive acts (e.g. jumping out of a car on the highway because the sky looked beautiful and I wanted a loser look)

I look back on those ugly symptoms and I could never cope with them now. I go to college full-time, I work, and I have so much to lose if I lost the ability to communicate with others and behave safely. On the other hand - my life just feels so damn gray and stagnant; I miss feeling invincible. 

Edited October 14 by braindeadbedhead

[Iceberg]

I know what you mean, but it’s always a case of “it’s good til it’s not” and you end up trashing your whole life 

[notloki]

Nope.

[sugarsugar]

Don’t I wish. But no. I can get on the point of being around the midpoint of moods but manic, it all goes to hell. 

[CeremonyNewOrder]

No. If you are functional, you are not manic. 

[saintalto]

Mania can’t be contained. 

[Gearhead]

No, there isn’t. You might manage a few days of increased productivity in the very beginning, but you can’t control mania. If you induce it or let it go when it starts on its own, you’re dooming yourself.

[4ao]

I just tried this game a short while back...disaster. I really thought I could pull it off...nope.

[hopelessromantic]

I would love to have drips of mania every now and again to increase my creativity and motivation to write and record music like I used to. Sadly it doesn't work that way. Whenever I'm in an up mood, I do try to channel it towards music. 

[Aeiou62]

I have done lots of experiments with that, and frankly I am really pissed off that there is no research being done to parse that out. I have had very, very productive manias where I accomplished amazing things before the psychosis set in. I dont just wake up speaking gobbledygook one day. Mania builds, gradually. You can learn to recognize it. So all Im asking is to go to Level 5 or 7, finish what I started last time i had a Big Idea, and then go to the ER, get a nice little shot of Abilify and sleep for 20 hours and awaken refreshed. Is that so much to ask?

Apparently it is, because nobody seems to be giving it much attention. Nevertheless, I have done it. It takes planning and a support person or two. And at least lukewarm approval from your pdoc. You have to have a way in to mania, periodic safety checks, an exit plan, and then a backup exit plan. And a way to get to sleep immediately.

There is a wonderful you on the way to mania, but there are other things behind Door No. 3 as well. Shadow people. Paranoias. Ive had several psychotic breaks. Been hospitalized, been arrested, been robbed, gone on walkabout, been unable to shut up. Been unable to stop buying stuff, been unable to eat, been unable to stop eating, been unable to stop screaming for four days, gone galloping through the woods in the dark trying to rescue ponies, then became a pony, only to realize I had to kill my pony self if I ever wanted to get back to my kids. Horrible things. Mania cannot be trusted. If you dont have a strong stick to jam into your own spokes, dont try to trigger it. And never go alone. You need supervision. My son says only superheroes need supervision. Remember that next time you feel 10 feet tall and bulletproof. You need supervision. Or at least a witness who will vouch for you in court.