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Hi-

I'm in a new relationship. My last major relationship ended because he couldn't handle me being BP, even though I'm rather stable.

I'm afraid to chase this one away. He's really a cool guy and I'd like him to know me for me without the stigma or bias of my disorders. On the other hand, I want to be straight-up so if he does have anything against mental illness, he can bail before anyone gets hurt.

When do you think it is best to disclose?

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Personally, I tend to disclose as soon as possible. That's just always been my style though. I am a very transparent person when it comes to my life and opinions and such. I want people to be able to make an educated decision when it comes to being involved with me, and I'd rather find out sooner than later if someone's not going to be able to handle it.

That said... most often, I tend to date people that have known me on a friendly basis for awhile before we become romantically involved. The bipolar is just something that comes up in conversation for me when I talk about my life. It's usually on the table way before the subject of dating comes up.

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I'm more on the wait and see side of things. Relationships are unpredictable and I'd want to pretty sure it was going to be going on for awhile before I disclose. I just prefer the idea of someone getting to know me before we add crazy into the mix.

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Everything SerraGeorge said describes me exactly. I so don't date people I don't already know. Only because I guess I just go where I know people.

If a guy would have to get to know me and like me before he could deal with the BP, I don't think that is someone I would want to be with. If he is going to go because of the BP, see ya. If it would freak him out that much, he wouldn't be able to deal with me in the long run anyway.

This is just MHO, though. It's just the way I am.

Sam

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