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My entire family is about to do a stupid


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Ever since I was six, my family (parents and brother) has gone to Florida over Thanksgiving. My grandparents used to be there. For those of you who are not Americans, Florida is a) bordered by the Atlantic on one side and the Gulf of Mexico on the other, b) full of retirees (“God’s waiting room”), and c) as described by one European, “Everything that makes you shake your head about the United States.” There’s a meme called Florida Man that explains it better than I ever could.

Unsurprisingly, their Governor has been issuing deranged diktats doing things like forbidding mask mandates in schools, and their courts have been upholding them. It’s not as bad as it was this summer, but the place is a fetid hole of coronavirus.

The last time I visited my family (there are seven of us, plus my husband and me, three of us teens), we had a conversation about whether or not to go this year. I said no, flat no. I’m not going through an airport-I think airports are disgusting under the best of circumstances. I’m not getting on a plane. I’m not staying in a gentilely down-at-the-heels resort with other people present and housekeeping staff in every day.

I thought my mom and her partner were undecided. And I can kinda live with that. In a way, it would be worse if her partner died-let’s call a possibility a spade!-because my mother is in her eighties and would never get over it.

And I thought my brother and his new wife weren’t going to go, either. But last night I found out that they are.

For those of you following along at home, I had Covid in August 2020, and now I have long Covid, and it has turned my life into a before and after story. The effects have been devastating. The worst of the physical stuff subsided after about ten months, but the neurological stuff is still with me. The worst of the brain fog, vertigo, and aphasia are better, but they’re still here. I can’t read as fast as I used to, and my reading comprehension is shot to shit. I make mistakes I’ve never made before. It’s like I suddenly have dyslexia. My sense of direction, which was already really, really bad, is now so much worse it’s genuinely frightening. I have tinnitus. My immune system sucks. I get so tired so easily.

My brother knows better than the rest of them how sick I’ve been, because he’s seen me having a flare up twice. He’s helped me so that I didn’t fall down the stairs, and kept me company while spasms wracked my body and I couldn’t stand up and I threw up all night. (In his bedroom, just by the by, which is the guest room when I visit). He knows.

And they are all going anyway. I’m somewhere between furious and panic attack. I can’t believe they’re being so stupid. I follow the pandemic closely. I know where the transmission rates are bad. I know there there are no hospital beds, no ventilators, where patients are lying the hallways at the emergency room for 24 hours because there is no space in the ER.

I can’t understand. My mother I sort of get. She can be quite petulant when she doesn’t get her way, when the world doesn’t conform to her plans.

But my brother. My nephew.

My brother says that he and his wife talked about it, and Covid is going to be around for who knows how long, and they’re running out of time to take all the kids on vacation as a family.

Their home state experienced a 45% uptick in new infections over the last two weeks.

I know three people who have been on airplanes in the last three months. They all came home sick. Not with Covid, with other viruses. Because viruses are very hard to avoid when you travel. Four people I know who haven’t traveled have gotten Covid in the last month.

My people are not idiots. We’re all smart. We’re all vaccinated. The old people have had boosters. We believe in science. We’re logical.

Why are they doing this? Why  are they taking the chance? Why don’t they understand what they’re risking?

Neither my brother nor my sister-in-law would be able to do their jobs if what happened to me happened to them. Bad as it’s been for me, it would be worse for them. And despite my periodic exasperation with her, I’d really rather my mother didn’t die. I think if she got respiratory complications, she might, very easily. We both have what the Victorians called “weak chests.” I also love her partner, independent of her, and want him to stick around.

So that was the vent, and here is the question: Do I say something? Do I think they would listen? No. Not really. Will it torture me for the rest of my life if something happens to one of them and I didn’t try to stop them?

Why are they doing this?


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  • Gearhead changed the title to My entire family is about to do a stupid

I think people are getting lax, and tired of restrictions.  Damn I was so wound up when it started I cleaned every door knob and high traffic/ high touch surface with bleach daily. 

I am a lot less concerned now.  But it's still a concern.

My area has had a some really crazy problems including the variant, and anti-masker protest that made me really annoyed.  People have the luxury of being stupid thinking internet research means something.

Edited by wookie
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18 hours ago, Gearhead said:

 Unsurprisingly, their Governor has been issuing deranged diktats doing things like forbidding mask mandates in schools, and their courts have been upholding them. It’s not as bad as it was this summer, but the place is a fetid hole of coronavirus.

Why are they doing this?


I hope I'm not violating any forum rules by saying this, but Governor of Florida is a special kind of stupid, isn't he?.........There is no way I would go to Florida right now, even if it was a family tradition.....One of my friends who lives in Florida was fully vaccinated and still got the coronavirus this past August.....Thankfully, due to his profession (nurse) he has already gotten his booster this month.

I really don't know why your family is doing this, but it's not your fault, Gear.....I understand stubborn family members, believe me.....My sister is a TEACHER in an elementary school, and still refuses to get vaccinated......Thankfully, at least, she is REQUIRED to wear a mask at work....She thinks that masks don't work....**SIGH**......

Her adult son and ex-husband are also unvaccinated, and both got COVID....Ex-husband was hospitalized and almost didn't make it.......She still won't get the vaccine...She's a highly educated woman--I just don't get it with her....

I really don't have much advice, except for I know what you're going through....Sending good thoughts and healing to you.,,,,

Edited by CrazyRedhead
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