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I’ve considered just letting myself stay awake until I die


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The meds that put me to sleep are ruining my heart health.

I cannot take seroquel.  Heart races out of control.

Zopiclone makes me crash mentally and physically and makes my heart race.

3.5 years ago I was a healthy person with a healthy heart rate.  Not anymore.

I just want to feel like a normal person.

This killing me literally

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6 hours ago, wookie said:

The meds that put me to sleep are ruining my heart health.

I cannot take seroquel.  Heart races out of control.

Zopiclone makes me crash mentally and physically and makes my heart race.

3.5 years ago I was a healthy person with a healthy heart rate.  Not anymore.

I just want to feel like a normal person.

This killing me literally

Have you tried anything else besides Seroquel and Zopiclone?.......I can't take Seroquel either because of the heart side effects (and weight gain). so I get it on that one.

There are other options if these are the only 2 you've tried.

Edited by CrazyRedhead
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15 minutes ago, wookie said:

Trazadone seems useless doesn’t put me out. 

Seroquel is off the menu because of heart effects for me as well.

i may go back on Remeron 

Remeron would be a good one to try if your doc approves....Lower doses seemed to work better for me (15mg).

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3 hours ago, wookie said:

Trazadone seems useless doesn’t put me out. 

Seroquel is off the menu because of heart effects for me as well.

i may go back on Remeron 

Were you taking seroquel at antipsychotic doses or just lower for sleep? 

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15 hours ago, Iceberg said:

Were you taking seroquel at antipsychotic doses or just lower for sleep? 

Both and without the psychosis.  It seems to have fucked my brain totally now I don’t know how to sleep at all.

It also jacks my hr up but no doctor noticed that for 6 months.

I was a completely healthy person 3 years ago with anxiety only

Remeron amps up my heart as well.  With 30mg and 500mg of gabapentin I had trouble breathing.

I used to run marathons and I feel all the medication has pushed me past the point of no return.

For thinking happiness was in a pill I lost my health and my sleep cycle and I have no direction in terms of treatment.  It feels like no one has it right.

Edited by wookie
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53 minutes ago, wookie said:

Both and without the psychosis.  It seems to have fucked my brain totally now I don’t know how to sleep at all.

It also jacks my hr up but no doctor noticed that for 6 months.

I was a completely healthy person 3 years ago with anxiety only

Remeron amps up my heart as well.  With 30mg and 500mg of gabapentin I had trouble breathing.

I used to run marathons and I feel all the medication has pushed me past the point of no return.

For thinking happiness was in a pill I lost my health and my sleep cycle and I have no direction in terms of treatment.  It feels like no one has it right.

Would belsomra be an option?

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3 hours ago, CrazyRedhead said:

@Iceberg, I was thinking the same thing........ @wookie, there is also a med out for insomnia called Dayvigo (came out in late 2019 if I recall).

They told me I'm out of options.  I don't know if this available in Canada.  i'm just going to try to meditating and natural stuff.  I haven't been given any other options.  I'm reluctant as well.  I pressured them into getting me a sleep study.  They had me set up with a sleep coach.

 

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1 hour ago, wookie said:

They told me I'm out of options.  I don't know if this available in Canada.  i'm just going to try to meditating and natural stuff.  I haven't been given any other options.  I'm reluctant as well.  I pressured them into getting me a sleep study.  They had me set up with a sleep coach.

 

I looked it up, and both Belsomra and Dayvigo are available in Canada.....Might be worth asking your doc about them, if you feel comfortable.

Did you already get the sleep study done?........ If so, what were the results, if you don't mind sharing......I had a sleep coach, too at one point, she did give me some helpful info.

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no sleep results.  I was supposedly submitted for one by the hospital but that fell by the wayside.  I don't know what happened because I came back to their care and you'd think someone would let me know.  My guess no requisition was completed.

I basically begged the walk-in doc to send me to a sleep clinic and not the one at our local hospital.  I was told by a counselor to avoid the hospital at all costs because she's heard the same thing before from several people.

So yeah, I've been on hold for a sleep clinic for a while now. At least a year and a half, and again before I moved I was down for a sleep study but then covid came along.

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2 minutes ago, wookie said:

So yeah, I've been on hold for a sleep clinic for a while now. At least a year and a half, and again before I moved I was down for a sleep study but then covid came along.

I'm so sorry to hear that.....I have tremendous empathy for folks with sleep problems....I've been there, and not being able to sleep sucks.

Are you getting any sleep at all...Even a few hours?

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3 hours ago, CrazyRedhead said:

I'm so sorry to hear that.....I have tremendous empathy for folks with sleep problems....I've been there, and not being able to sleep sucks.

Are you getting any sleep at all...Even a few hours?

Unless it's chemically induced.  I took 5 mg of ativan all at once the other day because I wasn't asleep by 5am.  The Zopiclone just makes me non functional throughout the day.  I can't tolerate anything else.

Just maybe giving up my sleep cycle will come back on it's own.  I slept a couple hours in shifts last night because of the Ativan hangover.

Trying meditation, binaural beats.  We'll see what tonight brings.

I'm screwed and I don't care anymore.

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I took 15 mg of mirtazipine I have left over. I read something.  I got like 10 library books.  I meditated, and spoke to someone. I fell asleep sometime after midnight and woke at 10am.  Sorry for being such an overdramatic idiot guys. 

Insomnia just makes me dread lying down.

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1 hour ago, Iceberg said:

Is your pdoc okay with you using the benzo to sleep? ... just wondering if you’ve tried the more “sleep-oriented” benzos 

It's a family doctor prescribing it and probably no

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Wookie, I would encourage you to keep hammering at whoever you need to to get that sleep study. If you have physical issues that are obstructing your sleep, it may be that no medication is going to alleviate it because it may not be treating the actual cause.

Several years ago I had a sleep study done. They called me and asked me to come back in and re-do the study because they thought they had messed up the study. Turned out, no, my sleep really was just that severely fucked. No surprise there, the Cerberus Little Wonder™ Analytic-O-Matic Positronic Brain has always been a bit of a Rube Goldberg Machine From Hell inside.

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