Newly diagnosed and confused

[lookaswan4141]

Hi, I'm new here. Newly diagnosed with bipolar disorder after years of being diagnosed with ADHD and severe depression. I'm told this is normal and often happens. I had a question about hypomania. I'm researching and learning more about this and sometimes I think "yes, that is definitely me!" and other times I have a hard time seeing it. My doctor told me I might think that I'm productive or just feeling good during mania and it might not feel like a problem, but then I make poor decisions that I never thought were related- like spending almost all my savings and staying up all night working on random projects- most recently started learning japanese in the middle of the night and stayed up all night memorizing the first script and started a course- among other things over the years.

When I say those things out loud (or type them) I can look at it and say "ok, yes, maybe that diagnosis fits." But right now, I feel evened out and I'm having trouble thinking I couldn't control that. Like I feel like I wouldn't make those decisions again if that makes sense. Is that normal to have a hard time accepting that when you're in a more "normal" (for lack of a better word- if there is one let me know) state?

Hope that made sense! Glad to be here. It's been difficult to just look things up. Glad there are spaces where people can come together and get support.

[CrazyRedhead]

2 hours ago, lookaswan4141 said:

 Glad to be here. It's been difficult to just look things up. Glad there are spaces where people can come together and get support.

Welcome to Crazyboards...!!   I've been a member for 5 years here, and I have found much support......I look forward to seeing you around...!!

I'm not bipolar, but there are other bipolar folks here who will hopefully reply.

Edited December 20, 2021 by CrazyRedhead

[Iceberg]

3 hours ago, lookaswan4141 said:

Hi, I'm new here. Newly diagnosed with bipolar disorder after years of being diagnosed with ADHD and severe depression. I'm told this is normal and often happens. I had a question about hypomania. I'm researching and learning more about this and sometimes I think "yes, that is definitely me!" and other times I have a hard time seeing it. My doctor told me I might think that I'm productive or just feeling good during mania and it might not feel like a problem, but then I make poor decisions that I never thought were related- like spending almost all my savings and staying up all night working on random projects- most recently started learning japanese in the middle of the night and stayed up all night memorizing the first script and started a course- among other things over the years.

When I say those things out loud (or type them) I can look at it and say "ok, yes, maybe that diagnosis fits." But right now, I feel evened out and I'm having trouble thinking I couldn't control that. Like I feel like I wouldn't make those decisions again if that makes sense. Is that normal to have a hard time accepting that when you're in a more "normal" (for lack of a better word- if there is one let me know) state?

Hope that made sense! Glad to be here. It's been difficult to just look things up. Glad there are spaces where people can come together and get support.

ive definitely had some moments of looking back and being like "what the hell was that, that wasn't me" I also have done some stuff that I personally can't justify in my head as something I would never do even when sick- so yes. Also, remember manic symptoms look different for everyone, so it can be hard to fit yourself in a mold... especially when first "discovering" these things 

[survivingbp]

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Edited August 25, 2022 by survivingbp