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is it normal for hypomanic episodes to feel scary and horrible


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my thoughts are racing, I can't concentrate on anything because I have a 5 second attention span, I feel like the part of me that's "me" is absent and I'm just being controlled by an autopilot while I'm not mentally there. I can't do even basic tasks because my memory issues when I'm like this mean I'll forget about something important. I just want to go back to feeling depressed when everything is slow and I'm in control.

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2 hours ago, catotheyounger said:

my thoughts are racing, I can't concentrate on anything because I have a 5 second attention span, I feel like the part of me that's "me" is absent and I'm just being controlled by an autopilot while I'm not mentally there. I can't do even basic tasks because my memory issues when I'm like this mean I'll forget about something important. I just want to go back to feeling depressed when everything is slow and I'm in control.

I’ve definitely had some similar not fun hypomanic stretches 

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it's weird because like, hypomania is always described in the literature as like this super fun thing that you have to pay for with depression and consequences down the line that bipolar people like because it's fun. But it always just seems miserable and scary and I just want it to be over.

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I've only had a few, but mine were scary each time.  Largely because I was afraid I was going to end up in the hospital, which is a bad thing for me, but also just because of the huge energy spike.  Mixed states are worse, but hypomania is still not fun.  Yes, the stereotype of it as always being good is still present. 

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In the DSM irritability, decrease attention and difficulty sticking with tasks (paraphrase) as possible criteria for mania. There can also be (mania or depression) with mixed features such as irritability and restlessness. The last DSM (I believe) had the term “dysphoric mania” referring to elevated mood but with a lot of the things you’ve mentioned. I had two episodes of this years ago and they were very nasty to manage 

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