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hiya,

I 've gotten some feed-back from my family that I'm crabby, not myself, and that I sleep too much (hey, when was 12 hours a day too much?).

I don't know how to combat these negative side-effects of this drug, or any AAP. The Zydis is supposed to make me not get fat on Z- let's see about that...

But being a bitch? Can't do that- especially when I get a job...am I just a crabby jobless person? Was I just not in the mood for my cousin visiting yesterday? Am i a total bitch?

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It takes some major effort to be aware of your behaviors, and when you are starting a medication you need to be especially attentive. You have done this many times, so you know that it can take time for side effects to diminish or for you to adjust to them.

Meds can't do all the work, and being bitchy isn't going to solve itself. it's definately possible that there are other factors.

You can either choose medication as an option or not. I would think that someone is less tolerable as an out of control manic or depressed mess. Having and keeping a job long term is pretty much out of the question, from the way you describe your life.

If APs are going to make you "crabby", than the choice is to work with a therapist and your psychiatrist to figure out how to deal with it and get around it or to give into your illness.

You have seemed very hesitant to choose a treatment plan and commit to it and you really need to simplify your life and concentrate on you. If you have to be crabby for a while to do that, at this point you probably need to let other people deal with that for the time being.

There are times when you come first and health is much more important than making other people happy. You have been in crisis more often than not in the past several months which means you need to pick a med and stick with it for a while. If your friends and family complain that you are being a little crabby, maybe you need to give them a reality check and tell them to give you some support, productive criticism, solutions and positive attention until you get something resembling order in your life. Then you all can discuss manners and pleasantries.

Not rules for life. But you need to get back on track one way or another and having people tell you that you are crabby or bitchy or that you sleep to much while trying to get your shit together isn't particularly helpful.

~navy~

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I needed at least 10 hours on seroquel and about that on zyprexa, IIRC.

Do you think you're crabby? Is there anything in particular that you have said or done to make other people say that?

People told me I seemed kinda spaced out on it. It was obvious that I was on something. I think it can be disturbing to some people to see that you're obviously on drugs regardless of why they are taking them. I think that's what "not yourself" means.

If it's helping as much as you say it is, stick with it and let other people deal with it.

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Navy, you're right that I haven't been stable. A large part I think is that my dad's suicide put me into a huge tailspin. I went from being a 4-cycle a year BP who was usually fine and on low drugs to an ultra-cycling, suicidal mess on lots of heavy drugs. And I need to get myself going towards positivity in my own actions and ask my family/friends to help me out in that area too.

And about my treatment? We've tried this and that. Now I have stated that we're sticking with Zyprexa Zydis- I tolerate it well, and even if I gain some weight, as long as it is an acceptable (not an unhealthy) amount, then it is fine. We're just playing with the dose right now. It will be 15 or 20 we think.

Yep VE- it is THEIR problem if they think i'm on something or it bothers them that I need to sleep 10 hours a night. i crash at around 10 and wake up around 8- sometimes i sleep longer, sometimes less. I sometimes feel crabby, but i don't think it is abnormal for me or an abnormal amount for a person. it could just be them, could be med/mood induced. who the heck knows?

i feel much more stable mood-wise.

I think that the counselor at the last inpatient visit I had was right- we get stable, with all our daily routines and make sure we do everything at the same time every day, and that will help our moods. I think I'm just going to focus on the larger areas first, like that I actually do see my pnurse every 3 weeks (I do), my tdoc weekly (I do), get my sleep, eat right (no more sneaking those candy bars!) and get some more exercise.

I have my cousin's puppy and I should just make my crab-ass self play with the puppy instead of crabbing at it. Maybe I'll actually have fun. Maybe I should use this time between jobs to get my routines down and have some fun and stop crabbing!

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