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time is unbearably slow


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The older I get the more med "compliant" I become for the simple reason that my chaotic and insane life has led to poor physical health with two chronic illnesses ( I won't mention now ). I think people are a little wary of getting close to me and don't currently have the usual sick relationship I have with another mentally ill person.

So...this past year I have been pretty good about taking meds and I guess what I'm feeling is stability. It is very slow moving and boring. I can't believe how many hours there are in a day. It really is unbelieveable.

On the other hand, I am exhausted. Maybe this is a new kind of depression for me - mine are usually agitated. I may still be recovering from my last mania/mixed state. It seems like there is no in between for me. I recently quit Risperdal because it was making me too hot and dizzy. I wonder if it was having an anti-depressant effect for me even though it is not known for this. I hate this shit. I'm not scheduled to see pdoc for another 2 weeks.

The slowness of everything is unreal for me. Does any one else get this?

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Life is mundane since I went on meds. I have to prod myself to leave the house. I'm lazy and even apathetic at times. My spikes of depression are almost welcome, just because they are something different. I miss the buzz of hypomania (the happy kind), but know that going there will have me in a sucidal depression soon.

I'll take the mundane anyday.

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I have been taking my meds every day for almost 2 years now and life has been unbearably boring. I barely ever leave the house and have nothing to say. It has gotten a little better since I changed meds last october but not a lot. I just sit and knit and watch tv. I do go out to play tennis every morning for a couple of hours. I also abuse drugs and alcohol out of pure boredom but lets not open that can of worms.

Anyway, I am with you on this one , but at least I am not chasing my husband with knives or saying outrageous things to people that I can't take back, or spending money like I am a friggin Vanderbilt, or screaming at my kids, or sweating with over the top anxiety. I'm very calm...

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For me, the "normal" time are when I am my nicest and most reasonable. I get things done. Some people experience this in hypo. i have no hypo. it is normal straight down to depr3ession or straight up to mania. people don't understand.

but i know what you're saying about it being boring. sometimes i am guilty of self-medicating via alcohol just to feel different. I try running and meditation to get myself into different mind/body states. You might benefit from this kind of stuff too.

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Now that I am stable I feel very even-keel, but I can still accomplish things and I have some normal mood fluctuation, especially in response to specific events.

I think the flat, boring feeling can be related to depression, and/or improper medication. Either way it's probably worth talking to your pdoc about if you haven't already.

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I hate being normal. I don't even clean anymore. I miss writing two screenplays a night, doing rugs, making jewelry, cooking, painting. Now I sit and watch tv. lovely ;) \\

I know what you mean. I am stable and I'm not liking it much. After spending eight hours at work and then three in class, I get home and I don't want to do any of my hobbies or make plans with my friends, I just want to surf the Net or read a book. Okay, I only have class twice a week, but the other days I still have to do schoolwork -- maybe when I'm finally finished with school, I'll be able to do something fun once in a while. I'm only sleeping five or six hours a night and am still quite energetic most of the day, but the problem is that lately I have to waste my energy on completely uninteresting forms of productivity and don't seem to have any left for fun productivity.

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Three words for you-- 'BEING STABLE SUX." Its slow and boring and you have no motivation and I cannot for the life of me figure out why I was so hell-bent to get this way. Oh, yea, I remember--the threat of divorce, ugly fights with kids, threats of violence, the list goes on.

So--I am boring and bored--

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Yah. I self medicate to change it up sometimes by smoking weed - it triggers a three hour hypomania in me. I try to limit it to only occassionally and then it's really potent and I get a lot done. I'm not recommending this to others but it's about the only thing that works for me though I can be a bit impulsive on it, I don't usually get in trouble unless I mix it with alcohol.

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Oh---dancing--I remember that--and going to bars. When I moved to Charleston, we knew (well) SIX PEOPLE who owned bars. Mucho fun--

Sigh--have a really great time for me tonite, you hear me, Loon???

Love, china the boring who will spend the evening sorting thru mounds of old pictures and trying to figure out which cousin is which-- what a thrill--

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