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Meeting my father for the first time


Whacko Jhacko

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I'm so nervous about meeting my biofather. And it just crossed my mind that maybe he won't want to meet me. But Tommy's going to ask him about it. She said she sees him around sometimes and they used to be good buds. I hope that means he's friendly.

I also wonder why he never came to meet me before. If he does meet me will it be because he really wants to? Does he care? Was he afraid of hurting me before? These are questions not to worry about though. I can either meet him or change my mind.

But something that I cannot get passed, this nagging pain in my chest a symptom of the only question even close to worth worrying about. I'm afraid I'll disappoint this guy who's nothing more than a spunk-injecter (eww the thought of my mother being "injected" just invaded my head and killed what little peace there was). But maybe that isn't so silly. I do wish him to be my father. My actual father; not just by blood. If he doesn't respect me (and I wouldn't blame him) well then that's ruined and it's all my fault.

Here's what I do know about him. He's a blond (like I was when I was born) white guy (as opposed to my malotto biomother) who shares my name and is friends with my Aunt Tommy and... had chances to see me but never has.

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