Nick Post Posted July 3, 2006 Share Posted July 3, 2006 So, I first came to CB around Feb of 2005ish. Couldn't have been 2004. I'm not sure. Basically, the depression I hadn't had since I was a teen came back full force. And rather than coming and going, it stayed. I started altering the type of work I did at work, to accomodate me crying in my work van. And, I really didn't work much anymore. Good think I work for the govt, eh? So, I was here probably in my first five or six months of Lexapro. I went from 10 mg to 20mg in the thirdish month. Then, after a half year, up to 30 mg. Then something weird happened. At 30 mg, I got symptoms similar to the edge of serotonin syndrome. I was literally out of my mind. I could function, but I was always in a confused, dreamlike state. I started tapering down, thinking, partially correctly, that it was the Lex doing this to me. When I got down to 15 mg, which took about two weeks, I was ready to die again. See, with meds, I'm pretty ok. My wife worries bigtime when I'm suicidal. Her and my daughter are all I live for, literally, I would have offed myself long ago if it wasn't for my wife, and with my daughter now, I know I can't do that. I'd mess up her life too. I can't. So, back to the doc, this time we'll try Wellbutrin. I've heard good things about The WB, and I'll say this, it you want to quit smoking, it'll help you. The one main WB side effect I seem to have, assholishenss. I'm very quick tempered on it. I'm in no way depressed, which is nice, but man, I have to keep my emotions in check. And, about two weeks ago, I discovered something. See, it's not just the WB that makes me surly. I think I need to have a glycemic crash about the same time to really reach Hulk like proportions (and, of course, have some sort of bait). So, I experimented, and found out that if I don't eat, I never have my low blood sugarness. In fact, it keeps me a little lethargic and I just don't feel like fighting. Don't worry, I've only lost about 10 lbs. I do eat, when I'm in front of people. But, that's me. No eating disorder, but you know, you always have to look out for that kind of thing. So, hey to those who know me and hi to those who don't. I'm back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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