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Grief for Our Lost Selves


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Some of you know that we lost our first child, and lost another a couple of months ago. I'm still struggling with the grief at times. But the point of this post is to share a poem I wrote for our first daughter.

I don't really know why I'm feeling so compelled to share this poem with all of you. Maybe its because of all the masks we end up wearing as BPs.

After we lost our second child, I was reflecting on this poem and began to realize maybe I wrote it more for myself than I realized.

Anyway, the thought behind it is this.... that we struggle in life and love and seek to "find ourselves" We marry, seek recognition at work, and are devastated when those close to us pass on (those most likely to "know" us and provide a trusting mirror). Why did I grieve so hard for my daughter? Because I never had the chance to "know" her, and she didn't get to know me. At the center of my being ... I need to be "known"

"You are Beautiful, Truly

You are Loved, Truly

Jesus came down and spoke your name,

And Truly, you are known"

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