Jump to content

All alone in a foreign country and in grad school, on top of that


Recommended Posts

Could someone recommend what I can do to or someone that I can talk to? I'm a grad student in the US and not originally from here. I am taking meds and also seeing the school consellor once a week, but that's it. Apart from that I have very little interaction of a more personal level. I can make small talk in class with others and all that but once I'm out of the class, where and to whom can I turn?

I am already stressed at school (It seems I might have bitten off more than I can chew, but now there is no turning back) and with the weather starting to change, can feel the onset of the winter blues already. I know I'll be able to handle school better if I have more human contact ( and the worst part is that I will be dealing mainly with animals in my research!). I've thought of joining various clubs, organizations, groups etc but they're full of cheery people who just make me feel worse about myself. Plus with a full schedule, it's hard to make time for such activities.

Any other grad students who feel they're in a similar situation? Woule any one like to exchange emails on a regular basis, to bolster each other's spirits and morale? Maybe even speak on the phone every once in a while. I know this sounds pathetically needy, but I could use all the support I can get.

Please help/advice ..

(And sorry if this message is comes as very vague and illdefined.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Where are you from? Have you had any luck finding expats from your native country anywhere?

I'm from India and and though I have acquaintances from my home country, it's almost impossible to talk about this with them due to the stigma attached with it and also due to the low levels of awareness about the condition, in general.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm in grad school.....and it is overwhelming.........

and friends are VITAL to get you through this.

I don't think you sound needy. I think you sound healthy for reaching out for support.

If you would like, PM me....I would be more than happy to look around for therapy groups or low-key social activites that you are interested in.

Group therapy (I went to one for major depression) was helpful for me because you are surrounded by people who can totally relate with your situation.....and it makes you feel...not so alone.

Hang in there.

School is an adjustment and so is moving to a place where you don't know anyone....it takes time, but I think you are on the right track.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi sk381, welcome.

I congratulate you on recognizing that you need more human contact to keep from slipping as winter approaches. It may be asking too much to expect to find a mental support group dealing with your problem soley for your nationality. Depending on your city size, perhaps their is a national MI group out in town, if not on campus.

Still, I think that your initial urge is correct. Maintaining regular contact with people is necessary even if you can only take it in small amounts.

best,

a.m.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My school has a peer counselling service, in which students who've demonstrated some skill in being nonjudgmental and listening to people sign a confidentiality agreement and take shifts sitting in an office on campus. Anyone who needs to just talk to someone can drop in. If there's something like that on your school, perhaps you could look into it. It's intended for the undergrads at my school, but graduate and postgraduate students are welcomed too. One of their major responsibilities is to provide referrals to other organizations for more specific help, and to inform new students of activities and resources in the area. Is there anything remotely like this offered at your school?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone for your replies. It's very encouraging to hear from others.

I did run a search for NAMI support groups and there seem to be a few of them in the city (I'm in Chicago). Maybe I'll try and go to one of the meetings. But I was speaking to someone who has attended their meetings in the past and they mentioned that most of the members at these meetings tended to be senior citizens. Not that anything is wrong in that, but I was hoping to meet and talk to others closer to my own age. But it is still a worthwile idea to pursue.

I wish our school has something on the lines of what 'lmnop' mentions. That sounds almost exactly what I might need.

Are there help lines that one can call and just talk? Not suicide prevention hotlines or those for emergencies but in case someone needs a listening ear at the othere end?

'dummyround' , I used to experience crushing social anxiety as well but have worked very hard to over come it in the last few years. Depression, though, is proving to be a harder beast to beat.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It may be asking too much to expect to find a mental support group dealing with your problem soley for your nationality.

Absolutely, a.m. I can't imagine such a thing even existing. The last time I was at the counselling center, I saw another guy of the same nationality there and on seeing me, he just got out of there without even making an appointment, I think. I almost guilty and had wanted to stop him but that would have made him even more uncomfortable.

It's taken me a while to come to terms with my diagnosis and speak about it with my family but I don't feel any stigma about it whatsoever, personally. But I can't say that for others. And I've tried to broach the subject with a few friends that I consider 'close'.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...