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Three weird days (TRIGGERS)


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Great aunt died last Thanksgiving (My family only dies on holidays) Left me 30,000 dollars (and another disbersment that I don't have yet) I ASKED them not to send it to me until we had a final amount so that I would not have to go through the legal hassle twice or more. I ASKED them to not send the money with out a lot of prior warning. They said that they would keep it indefinetly for me. Got the check, lost my foodstamps, medicaid and gonna have to pay back my SSDI and SSI this month. Thursday, get a bank account, very stressful, SO stressed because he has to go back to work and get recertified for one of his computer things I dunno...I come home freaking out and with a bottle of wine. Have been off some of my meds because I can't afford them this month. Started having SERIOUS flashbacks with smell-o-rama and everything...drink wine, take some pills. Hours of f*cking flashbacks. Can't think enough to call for help. SO gets home and I have the bawling, screaming waahoogas at him...

Not enough sleep, inspite of Trazadone for me and just not enough for a stressed, overworked sweetie... Friday....More, worster flashies...One of my alters tries to end it by gulping pills and chugging tequila...got sick, didn't die dammit. Go to double tdoc appointments...feel some better. Get notice in the mail that I have to re-certify for foodstamps and medicaid. Too damned tired to care. On heavy drugs all of Saturday. Don't remeber most of the stupid day...sat and stared at pics on Deviant Art. Go pick up some small amount of my missing meds. On way back pick up mail...Another government post...open it. "Welcome to medicare"

Still feel like laying in a mudpuddle and laughing...I really am slipping off the edge... gone barking mad

Morel of story: NEVER EVER, throw up tequila through your nose

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panz,

it seems like you're having a lot of problems with this inheritance and keeping your disability benefits! that shouldn't be. i don't agree with our weird laws, but who am i, just another crazy person!

i don't understand the system either.

your alters seem out of control! does your tdoc work with the alters?

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poor panz!!! you know we're here if ANY of you need to talk. you can pm or post something and we'll get it :)

thanksgiving is a rough time for us because any family get together day is stressful in our family. this is actually the first year i've ever made it through november without a bunch of mental health days off form work. so there's hope ;)

anything we can do to help you out?

abifae

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