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i think that, possibly, i don't actually understand what competition is.

i was thinking about competition and decided that the reason i don't compete against anyone but myself is that, besides none of them existing strongly enough in my reality to matter, they can't compete with me because i am so much better than they are. i'm so full of myself it's great lol.

then i thought, but i DO compete with myself. i always want to do better than i did before. only any upset i get is just the triggered "omigod i didn't do better someone is going to kill me" and, while i AM interested in always improving, i'm not actually angry or upset at myself as i go (ignoring the trigger part, which doesn't count).

so i thought, well i do sort of compete against people i deem better than myself. only, it's more like i use them as a picture of what i can be and work towards that. like, i want to dance as well as izzy and my current teacher and my previous teacher (izzy is my future teacher hehehehe). again, there's no anger or being upset. not even any triggery crap. just a "some day" happy sighs when watching them dance.

so i thought, either i'm totally non competitive, which is possible, or maybe i AM competitive but just don't quite understand it.

i have it in my head competitive has to have some degree of anger in it, and drive. is that right?

either way, i think it's quite possible i don't understand what competitive is, as a state of being.

although i think i CAN add it to my list of "things abi doesn't feel and is better off for missing out on" lol.

any ideas?

abifae, who loves using this board to figure out all these things she reads about in books but has never quite "got".

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Oh damn...you are going to make me think again, aren't you? LOL

As far as the teachers go, you are using them as an inspiration...a goal you want to achieve. (I feel the same way....they are awesome dancers!)

Now...competition. I think you do compete, but in a positive way. Some people see competition as a need to destroy others and always be on top. While it would be nice to be the best all the time, I realize that isn't reality and you seem to see that too. In dance class we both use competition as a way to motivate ourselves. If you pick up on a move before me...I think "Damn! I can't let her beat me!" but it is light-hearted..and we often smile at each other (or stick out our tongues...or stop and help each other...whatever...LOL)

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Insecure people make competition into something ugly when it can simply be a way to push yourself and others to a higher level.

The insecure feel a need to "prove" somethig and have their ego and all sorts of crap tied up in to winning.

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Insecure people make competition into something ugly when it can simply be a way to push yourself and others to a higher level.

The insecure feel a need to "prove" somethig and have their ego and all sorts of crap tied up in to winning.

well that isn't too bright. most of them lose most of the time (mathematically, only one winner...)... so aren't they setting themselves up?

abi

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I think the "Chance Twins" provide a good example of competitiveness. The goal need not always be first, most, best.

Ahead of, more than, better than can work just as well.

When being chased by a bear, I only need to be faster than the slowest person in the group.

Then there's Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan. If they'd spent their energies on bettering themselves instead of besting others,

perhaps they'd both have been more successful. In that sort of competition, the only way to win is not to play.

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I compete in Scottish Highland Games, but everyone helps and cheers for each other, even if it will mean they beat you. Mostly people want to do the best they can, but if someone needs help with technique, there is always someone to share their knowledge.

Tommy

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Yeah Tommy, that is exactly the spirit here in the local dance community. It is FRIENDLY competiton.

One of my direct competitors in business is also my friend. We tend to have different specialties, but we do directly compete in a lot of areas. We send each other business all the time because some clients are a better fit for her and vice versa. We spur each other to do better and be more innovative, plus we applaud each other's successes.

When being chased by a bear, I only need to be faster than the slowest person in the group

Hee hee hee

True wisdom yet again from null ;)

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