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This is my first post, I wanted to say hello to everyone on this board. ;)

I was told by one doctor that I have PMDD and put on Zoloft. That didn't seem to work for me. I attempted to sign up for a clinical study for depression and the doctor told me that I have Bipolar2. (this was a couple of months ago) It just hit me a few days ago that I really could be suffering from it .. *sigh* I'm not on medication yet, still searching for a doctor.

Because I can hide behind my computer screen, I have to admit that I'm scared. I know its not like having cancer, but its something that I will have to manage every day. Over the last two years, I have become reclusive and anti-social; this is hard to accept because I used to be a social butterfly. In between the very few "happy days" that I have, I'm filled with rage and am hard to deal with. (my daughter is five and i've been engaged for three years)

...

okay, okay. I think I could write a book .. hah! I would like to make some new friends. People who will understand me and not judge me, nor make fun of me.

*muah* thanks for letting me share ..

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*muah* thanks for letting me share ..

thanks for sharing! tell as much or as little as your comfortable with...

lot's of people here have played musical dx's, sometimes dx changes with a new doc... the advantage of that is that they tell you... and sometimes change with what your pdoc had for breakfast, but you often won't know that for ages, they sometimes just write it on your file and don't tell you...

welcome to cb's

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Friends is what you'll make here. And no-one is judgemental because we all have our own issues.

Welcome to the life sentence of bipolar. There, that got that bit out of the way: when it hit me, it was like being hit by a truck. I just reeled from it for weeks. Now, 18 months or more after the diagnosis, I can accept it OK. I can't remember exactly when I finally came to terms with it, but it was the realisation that what I had was all there was. That was it, take it or leave it. So I just decided to get on with my life, stop apologising for mistakes that my illness had caused. I told those around me that I had to reinvent myself, and I aksed what they wanted. No answer. So I just said, "OK, I'll do it myself, and if you don't like what you seee, you'd better speak up."

So I'm nicely medicated, leading a pretty normal life. My kids joke about me remebering to take my 'mad pills'. I hold down a good job. Once you get a doc and some meds sorted out, you can pick up the pieces, too.

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Good morning!

Thank you all for your replies, it really does mean a lot to me. I look forward to learning from all of you; whether we share the same craziness or not. Much love to all of you!! (i had tears in my eyes by the time i was done reading) <3

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Hi!

Thanks for the PMs.

Dan is totally correct on pdocs and the dx's they hand out. my first pdoc was certain i was just depressed with avoidant issues. even when i would talk of major spending sprees or seeing things (hallucinations)...etc. he said no way i was bipolar....but put me on seroquel anyway.

and then my current pdoc said it was very clear i was bp2 and has helped me immensly. i really like him as he is very patient and always uses a calm & reassuring voice.

welcome & i hope you are also having fun,

december

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