Jump to content

Two Brain Halves each say goodnight

Recommended Posts

Since living with my boyfriend (I was married a few years ago but my ex slept like a log so I never did this) I have found that a strange thing happens regularly after going to bed - basically I usually say goodnight (perhaps with a brief cuddle and peck on the cheek) and turn around to get to sleep. This often is almost like on autopilot, like a lot of things seem to be for me. Then (and this happens many times a month usually), up to an hour or more later, it's as if "another me" (but still *me* I have never experienced different personalities, just different modes of experiencing things) wakes up, thinks "OMG I haven't said goodnight!" so I give him a cuddle and say "Night-night!" again and kiss him on the cheek again (or in the eye or ear by accident ;) ), then turn back over and think "Oh bugger I've done it again!"

When this happens usually I also notice that I am sleeping on the opposite side to where I fell asleep, and am more aware on one side of the body (usually one ear tends to hear better/be more sensitive to noise when I fall asleep, so I sleep on that).

I am diagnosed with a mild Autism Spectrum Disorder and "attentional dysfunction" but have over time experienced various funky sleep abnormalities including many hypnagogic and some hypnopompic hallucinations and false awakenings. As a kid I would often go to sleep and then after a while call for my Mum as well, it kind of has a similar feel to it, like the main "me" can only interact on autopilot and wants to be left alone but then that goes to sleep and suddenly the "real" me can express itself (and the real me can be more affectionate too).

This is strange because it only ever happens when going to sleep! I have often experienced what feels like switches in laterality (for example I usually sit exclusively on the right side of the bus and almost completely ignore visual input from the left side of my field of vision, so I have my peace and can look out the window without registering the other passengers), usually when I was in the "other" mode and felt the need to sit on the left hand side of the bus instead, and I'd be aware and interested in the scenery and suddenly *switch* and I am aware only of the interior of the bus an the window to my left just is a pane of glass that I can hardly bring myself to look through.

Nowadays about 75% of the time my right eye is domininant, but a kid on photos for years and years I always had my RIGHT eye turned inwards (and visibly NOT focusing on anything) though, which suggests that for a very long time this was the other way around. I have certainly experienced at some point in my childhood around age 5-7 (this may well coincide with the removal of my tonsils which put an end to chronic ear infections) a "crash" in visual input as if both eyes were suddenly switched on, and my brian just couldn't cope! Before that my memories are more visual and wholesome but after that my visual field collapsed to a spot near my feet and my memories of places etc. consist mostly of an awareness of invisible shapes (like with a blind person) that I can "feel" against my skin but can't picture very well at all.

This is further complicated by the fact that I am short-sighted in my right eye and my lovely brain seems to have split my vision into using the right eye for nearby objects and the left for the rest, which means my binocular vision has never really worked properly. Since taking meds for ADD I do get a lot of "Ah so this is what the world looks like" moments and on the latest combo (300mg modafinil/150mg Bupropion) my vision has been more stable than ever.

Anyone had anything similar to this happen to them or does anyone have a clue if I am right in thinking this is an issue with intrahemispheric communication?

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...