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keeping triggers out of topic title


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Please try to avoid "triggers" in your title- if you have one in your post its good to warn like most people do. if the trigger is in the title there is no choice to avoid it.

for example better to title a post "suicidality" rather than "i tried to kill myself by such and such method today"

I know we are here to be sensitive and supportive of eachother. I just was upset when i've found myself triggered by too much info in the title . and them i'm too freeked out to offer any help or support to the person posting)

( btw- i'm not speaking of any post in particular- it has happened a few times)

appreciate the sensitivity- thanks, mrs l

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To quote the new user agreement:

A lot of other sites place great importance on making sure people are not offended or "triggered." We don't. With reasonable exceptions such as the PTSD board, we don't do a lot of walking on eggshells around here. Everyone is encouraged to say what they need to say and not worry about what effect it may have on others.

A lot sites place primary importance on keeping their users safe even if it means that they are not allowed to express extreme emotion while in pain. We are not one of them. We don't play that way. If the title of a post really bothers you, feel free to PM the author and ask them to change it. They would be well within their right to tell you to fuck off though. I know I would.

Besides, everybody has different triggers. To say that something is "triggering" is a lot like saying it's obscene or that it's pornographic. Everyone has their own standard and there can be no way to enforce one without being ungodly pompous.

Bottom line: each person is responsible for their own triggers.

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To follow up on that a bit, If it's obvious that someone is being deliberately triggering, I look at it pretty much the same as if they were to walk up to a stranger on the street and punch them in the face. It's a different matter entirely. It's deliberately hurting others as an outlet for your own pain and there is simply no room for it in any kind of peer support environment.

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If you do find yourself triggered by someone's post, and you feel too upset to respond to it, then that's the best time to start a new topic and post what you're going through. Then someone here can help you until the time you feel strong enough to help others again.

We're here for you as well as you being here for us.

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gee- thanks for the "support". i'm not saying people should not express anything IN their post, but duh- don't you think saying something to the effect of "i just took 5000 mg of lithium and am sitting here waiting to die. is that still considered only "subjectively" triggering.

Well VE- i'd say f- off right back.

( also those of us with or without ptsd frequent other boards too)

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gee- thanks for the "support". i'm not saying people should not express anything IN their post, but duh- don't you think saying something to the effect of "i just took 5000 mg of lithium and am sitting here waiting to die. is that still considered only "subjectively" triggering.

Well VE- i'd say f- off right back.

( also those of us with or without ptsd frequent other boards too)

i do find some topic titles triggering. seeing them over and over can get very wearing. eventually i manage to figure out exactly where they are and avoid them, or like the train wreck phenomenon, keep glancing over -- and eventually notice when it's gone.

but if a member's triggery stuff is only in the post itself, is this any better? because then if the topic isn't triggery, and the content is, then people who would be triggered by the content might stumble into it? of course we can have more control over whether we go into view a topic that seems like it *might* be triggery for us.

i think that the point is that all triggers are subjective.

fwiw, the team is currently discussing the subject triggers and specifically when people post suicidemethods. for instance, one post with an overdose amount was edited to remove that information. people don't need extra information on how to go about killing themselves.

i think part of the point is that there are enough sites to go to where every d*mn thing that people might find tri**ering is edited, spoilered, and removed, and people f*cking banned for trying to f*cking express themselves in order to deal with i**ness and trau*a and a*use they are going through with other people who might understand.

those with ptsd are responsible for their own triggers (and need to find ways to cope with them mainly through working through them rather than just avoidance because we can't always avoid triggers)

just like those with epilepsy are responsible for doing what they can to avoid seizure triggers (freezing or eliminating smileys and flashy .gifs from websites, for example, rather than expecting all sites to stop using these features)

it sucks, when we have to accommodate our own limitations, but expecting others to do it for us can only lead to more frustration because ultimately they won't all do it.

sorry it's not the answer you were looking for.

pj

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gee- thanks for the "support". i'm not saying people should not express anything IN their post, but duh- don't you think saying something to the effect of "i just took 5000 mg of lithium and am sitting here waiting to die. is that still considered only "subjectively" triggering.

The people just posting things like that to get a rise out of everyone else deserve to reap a more

rapid buttload of abuse than an asshole posting under a more sedate topic title.

Then again we really do get folks posting a topic like that while they're working on their suicide plan.

How much is it worth to you for us to tell the person who might seriously be trying to decide between washing

a bottle of pills down with whiskey and a razorblade bath scene that they can't post stuff like that here?

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I think my post must have been highly misunderstood. yeah everybody is responsible for there own shit- no kidding. Honestly i was interested in what other people might think about this-but that opportunity was pretty well lost when the post was moved.

I feel i've been very helpful to many people here and plan to continue to try to do so, but being condescending to and swearing at me or anyone kind stops any viable communication in its tracks.

nice role model VE.

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As present joy pointed out you did opt to delete the mg amount from the posted suicide attempt. this exactly proves my point.

and ve i'm sorry this got heated (for me anyway) but in looking back there really was no reason to jump down my throat and start swearing in your initial response. how about a discussion? or an opinion or a question?

this experience kind makes me wonder if i sent you a hello post would you tell me to fuck off? i don't see that as any different from how this was handled. and yes i do have higher expectations from you because you're in charge. i don't see anything wrong with that.

and you don't have to point out that i'm responsible for my own feeling pissed off, and i do. big time.

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As much as I abhor censorship, I fear wrongful death lawsuits. We draw the line at posting information which could help people intent on suicide successfully pull it off. This can include overdose doses. I don't want someone sitting at home reading and going "ok, she took dose x and is still alive so I better take more." There are euthanasia method websites out there and we're not one of them.

It has nothing to do with triggers.

Your request was contrary to the stated purpose of our community which is why it didn't exactly get a warm reception.

Why are you hung up on the fact that I used profanity rather than what I actually said?

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Here's the situation:

If I am sitting at my keyboard, in a state of extreme emotional distress I may write a triggering topic title. If someone then PMs me and asks me to change it, I would probably end up really pissed off or hurt. Here I am, pouring out my guts to the world about the shit state that I'm in, and someone else wants me to edit what I say. Who thinks rationally when they're having a breakdown?

We're all a little crazy and are going to act accordingly and some of us will rub up against eachother and trigger eachother now and then no matter what. We can make an attempt not to but I think most of these "triggering" topic titles happen when people are in great distress. I don't want people getting to the point where they think they can't post because they might set off someone else.

Anywho.

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