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good mood build up to manic?


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okay. woke up in a good mood. talkative, not rapid, pretty sharp. laid back. later, more talking almost becoming non-stop nonsense.

felt that edge. like it just increased in intensity.

did not get bad. realized i was a nuisance. shut-up. backed off. no problem.

evening. felt normal, but alert. which is good. but, where did hyperness come from?

it was like, felt more active, in a good mood, then builds into hyperness but could back down from it just by shutting up.

***ques: ADD, need more mood stablizer, will resolve with increase in ap?***

ANTI-PSYCHOTIC UPDATE!!!!

i upped my risperdal to 1.5, then 2 because i got to the point where my brain was just mush. yes, i did it myself, but had tried 2 mg before. only before, my brain was blank. but, as you can see from above, i am more talkative but make more sense (welllll...), less mush.

basically, it is reacting completely differently than it did the first time which was year 1/2 ago. in a good way (knock on wood).

i am actually thinking that i want to keep pushing it up to like see if i can get rid of the foggy brain altogether. which i will do under a doctor's care.

so all that turmoil about not being able to take an ap is looking close to being resolved (knock on wood).

QUESTION NOT RELATED TO ABOVE:

i have been on edge for quite awhile. when i am sitting still, i am ancy to do something else. not as bad as the anxiety i have felt before, but still think it could be anxiety. just a general feeling of needing movement (akasthesia? but doesn't feel thaat bad) ***any ideas?***

thank you so much for listening. i am doing much better than i was and feel like i am just trying to tie up loose ends (until it unravels again).

have a spunky day!

kathy

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Yes, been there, done that. Usually for me it comes from nowhere out of a mild depression, and suddenly I'm upbeat, lively, switched on, sarcastic (always a bad sign with me), quick... I'm now very aware of where that could lead, so I can sort of force myself to back off a little, and it seems to work. If I don't catch it at that point, I either have to hope it runs its course or hit the APs (which I'm loath to do). For me (this just happened , BTW) it was triggered by some good news and a sudden release in pressure and stress. I felt like a pressure cooker and the valve had just been opened and everything started to boil over.

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I've had that happen. You think you are just happy, then whoops - you're really manic. Or hypo whatever. Sucks. Also sucks that we can't even enjoy being productive and happy, we have to second guess it and make sure we don't go through the roof. NOT FAIR.

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